127.(組詩)歲月微瀾之四:難言的霧霾
文/黎曆
東方 曾經神秘的大地
現代的足音纏繞亙古的寧靜
煙囪 毫不吝嗇
吐出億萬年曆史的殘骸
陰霾飄浮 為都市鋪下
一道若即若離的倒影
為時代虛幻出
真實的海市蜃樓
陽光被視為稀有的物種
大鱷吞噬生命的鬱蔥
一隻縞枯的手 向入侵的資本
交出祖輩清澈的眼眸
海邊 一葉虛弱的肺
吸納載滿銅幣的淫風
吐出翻滾利潤的濁流
江河早已失去記憶
掏空往事與月光
煙囪的巨毫
在此岸 潑灑窒息的濃墨
卻在彼岸 飾潤湛藍的天空
盡管影子與影子
在擁擠的路上重疊
盡管呼吸與呼吸
在熙攘的生命之間放遠
一盞落滿塵埃的燈
依然刺破層層霧影
照耀遠逝的流水
和守望的青山
2025-05-01
Gemini的詩評
這首題為《難言的霧霾》的詩,是組詩《歲月微瀾》的第四首,以其深沉的筆觸和強烈的意象,描繪了現代化進程中東方古老大地所承受的生態困境與人文失落。詩人黎曆以其獨特的視角,將具體的環境問題——霧霾,提升到了對時代、曆史和人性的深刻反思層麵。
以下是我對這首詩的一些評論:
1. 宏大的曆史敘事與尖銳的現實批判:
詩歌開篇就將“東方”這一具有曆史厚重感的概念與“現代的足音”對立起來,暗示了現代化進程對傳統寧靜的衝擊。“煙囪毫不吝嗇/吐出億萬年曆史的殘骸”一句,以極具力量的意象,將工業汙染比作對曆史文明的摧毀,其“億萬年”的誇張更凸顯了汙染的深重和不可逆性。
2. 霧霾的多重象征意義:
霧霾不僅僅是自然現象,在詩中更具象征意義。“陰霾飄浮/為都市鋪下一道若即若離的倒影/為時代虛幻出/真實的海市蜃樓”,描繪了霧霾籠罩下城市景象的模糊與虛幻,也暗示了現代社會在快速發展中可能出現的迷失與不真實感。這種“真實的海市蜃樓”既指環境的惡化是真實存在的,也暗示了繁榮景象背後可能隱藏的虛假與脆弱。
3. 對自然、生命與人文價值的侵蝕:
“陽光被視為稀有的物種/大鱷吞噬生命的鬱蔥/一隻縞枯的手/向入侵的資本/交出祖輩清澈的眼眸”,這一段將環境汙染與資本擴張聯係起來。“大鱷”象征著貪婪的資本力量,它吞噬的不僅是綠色的生命,更是“祖輩清澈的眼眸”,象征著傳統價值觀、純真和對美好環境的記憶的喪失。“縞枯的手”則暗示了在資本麵前,個體和傳統力量的無力和無奈。
4. 個體與環境的共命運:
“海邊/一葉虛弱的肺/吸納載滿銅幣的淫風/吐出翻滾利潤的濁流”,詩人將個體的生命體驗與環境汙染緊密相連。“虛弱的肺”直接承受著汙染的侵害,而“載滿銅幣的淫風”則形象地描繪了經濟利益背後肮髒的代價。“吐出翻滾利潤的濁流”則揭示了經濟發展與環境汙染之間的惡性循環。
5. 對地域差異與社會不公的暗示:
“江河早已失去記憶/掏空往事與月光/煙囪的巨毫/在此岸/潑灑窒息的濃墨/卻在彼岸/飾潤湛藍的天空”,這一段暗示了汙染的地域性轉移和社會的不公。汙染集中在一岸,而另一岸卻享受著藍天,這種對比令人深思,揭示了發展中可能存在的犧牲與不平等。
6. 個體在困境中的堅守與希望:
詩歌的後半部分,雖然描繪了擁擠與疏離的現代生活,但“一盞落滿塵埃的燈/依然刺破層層霧影/照耀遠逝的流水/和守望的青山”,象征著在困境中依然存在著微弱但堅韌的希望。這盞燈,即使落滿塵埃,也依然努力照亮著過去的美好(遠逝的流水)和未來的期盼(守望的青山)。
7. 語言的凝練與意象的生動:
整首詩語言凝練,意象鮮明而富有張力。“現代的足音纏繞亙古的寧靜”、“億萬年曆史的殘骸”、“真實的海市蜃樓”、“載滿銅幣的淫風”、“窒息的濃墨”、“落滿塵埃的燈”等意象都極具表現力,引發讀者的深刻聯想。
整體而言,《難言的霧霾》是一首具有強烈現實關懷和深刻人文思考的詩歌。詩人通過對霧霾這一具體現象的描繪,展現了現代化進程中環境的惡化、傳統價值的失落以及個體生命的脆弱。詩歌的批判性與反思性並存,結尾處的一絲光亮則為讀者保留了希望。這不僅僅是對環境問題的控訴,更是對時代發展模式的深刻質詢。
英文版
(Poetry Series) Ripples of Time IV: The Unspeakable Smog
By Lily
The East—once a land of ancient mystery,
now echoes with the footsteps of modern days.
Chimneys, without restraint,
exhale the relics of a billion silent years.
Haze floats low, laying over the city
a reflection that flickers and fades,
miraging the age
with a truth made of illusion.
Sunlight—now a rare species—
as primeval green is devoured by giant predators.
A withered hand offers
our ancestors’ clear-eyed gaze
to the invading hunger of capital.
By the sea, a frail lung
inhales winds reeking of copper coins,
then exhales a churning tide
of profit and pollution.
Rivers have long forgotten themselves,
drained of memories and moonlight.
The chimney, a colossal brush,
splatters suffocating ink across this shore
while painting azure skies for the other.
Though shadow merges with shadow
on crowded, narrow roads,
though breath evades breath
in jostling, restless lives—
a lamp, layered in dust,
still pierces the folds of haze,
lighting the vanished stream,
and the watchful green of distant hills.
Many 1, 2025
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Translator’s Note
on “Ripples of Time IV: The Unspeakable Smog”
This poem, the fourth in the Ripples of Time series by Chinese poet Li Li, navigates the blurred border between ecological lament and spiritual persistence. Rooted in the industrial haze of modern urban China, it critiques the environmental degradation and moral erosion brought by unchecked capital expansion, while evoking a deep historical consciousness. The smog, here, is not merely a meteorological condition but a metaphorical veil cast over memory, identity, and truth.
Through vivid imagery—choking chimneys, profit-laced winds, forgotten rivers—the poet crafts a world both suffocating and strangely luminous. The final image of a dusty lamp breaking through the layers of haze offers a glimmer of endurance, a quiet act of witnessing. In translating this work, I sought to preserve both its lyrical cadence and its critical voice, ensuring that its resonance could cross not only linguistic boundaries but also cultural and environmental ones.
This poem invites us to see not only the damage we cause but the lights we still keep lit.