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So, from the very beginning, he bred bad feeling in the house; and at Mrs. Earnshaw’s death, which happened in less than two years after, the young master had learned to regard his father as an oppressor rather than a friend, and Heathcliff as a usurper of his parent’s affections and his privileges; and he grew bitter with brooding over these injuries. I sympathised a while; but when the children fell ill of the measles, and I had to tend them, and take on me the cares of a woman at once, I changed my idea. Heathcliff was dangerously sick; and while he lay at the worst he would have me constantly by his pillow: I suppose he felt I did a good deal for him, and he hadn’t wit to guess that I was compelled to do it. However, I will say this, he was the quietest child that ever nurse watched over. The difference between him and the others forced me to be less partial. Cathy and her brother harassed me terribly: he was as uncomplaining as a lamb; though hardness, not gentleness, made him give little trouble. He got through, and the doctor affirmed it was in a great measure owing to me, and praised me for my care. I was vain of his commendations, and softened towards the being by whose means I earned them, and thus Hindley lost his last ally: still I couldn’t dote on Heathcliff, and I wondered often what my master saw to admire so much in the sullen boy; who never, to my recollection, repaid his indulgence by any sign of gratitude. He was not insolent to his benefactor, he was simply insensible; though knowing perfectly the hold he had on his heart, and conscious he had only to speak and all the house would be obliged to bend to his wishes. As an instance, I remember Mr. Earnshaw once bought a couple of colts at the parish fair, and gave the lads each one. Heathcliff took the handsomest, but it soon fell lame, and when he discovered it, he said to Hindley— “You must exchange horses with me: I don’t like mine; and if you won’t I shall tell your father of the three thrashings you’ve given me this week, and show him my arm, which is black to the shoulder.” Hindley put out his tongue, and cuffed him over the ears. “You’d better do it at once,” he persisted, escaping to the porch (they were in the stable): “you will have to: and if I speak of these blows, you’ll get them again with interest.” “Off, dog!” cried Hindley, threatening him with an iron weight used for weighing potatoes and hay. “Throw it,” he replied, standing still, “and then I’ll tell how you boasted that you would turn me out of doors as soon as he died, and see whether he will not turn you out directly.” Hindley threw it, hitting him on the breast, and down he fell, but staggered up immediately, breathless and white; and, had not I prevented it, he would have gone just so to the master, and got full revenge by letting his condition plead for him, intimating who had caused it. “Take my colt, Gipsy, then!” said young Earnshaw. “And I pray that he may break your neck: take him, and be damned, you beggarly interloper! and wheedle my father out of all he has: only afterwards show him what you are, imp of Satan.—And take that, I hope he’ll kick out your brains!” Heathcliff had gone to loose the beast, and shift it to his own stall; he was passing behind it, when Hindley finished his speech by knocking him under its feet, and without stopping to examine whether his hopes were fulfilled, ran away as fast as he could. I was surprised to witness how coolly the child gathered himself up, and went on with his intention; exchanging saddles and all, and then sitting down on a bundle of hay to overcome the qualm which the violent blow occasioned, before he entered the house. I persuaded him easily to let me lay the blame of his bruises on the horse: he minded little what tale was told since he had what he wanted. He complained so seldom, indeed, of such stirs as these, that I really thought him not vindictive: I was deceived completely, as you will hear. |
所以從一開始，他就沒給這家裏帶來好感。沒過兩年，俄韶太太去世了，這時小少爺已經體會到把他父親看成壓迫者而不是當朋友，而把黑思克裏夫當作一個篡奪他父親的情感和特權之人。他煩悶地想著這些委屈，心裏越發覺得痛苦。有一陣我還同情少爺，但當孩子們都出麻疹時，我得照顧他們，擔負起一個做女人的責任，我就改變想法了。黑思克裏夫病得非常嚴重。他病得最厲害時，他總是要我常常守在他枕畔。我料想他是覺得我為他付出很多，還猜不出我是情非得已。無論如何，我得說——做保姆的從未照顧過像他這樣安靜的孩子。他與別的孩子不同，迫使我不得不少偏一點心。闞思和她哥哥把我磨得要命，他卻像個羊羔似的沒有絲毫抱怨——盡管他不夠寬厚，冷酷麻木卻令他並不給人添什麽麻煩。 他活過來了，大夫肯定地說這得多虧了我，並且稱讚我照顧得好。我因為他的讚賞而得意洋洋。因為照顧這個孩子而贏得讚賞，我對他也就變得心軟了。就這樣亨得利失去了他最後一個同盟者。不過我還是不能疼愛黑思克裏夫，我常常很好奇在這鬱鬱寡歡的孩子身上，我的主人不知道看出哪一點會讓他這麽喜歡。根據我的記憶，這孩子可從來沒有過任何感激的表示以報答他的寵愛。這孩子對他的恩人並非無禮，他隻是無動於衷。盡管這孩子完全知道他在主人心中所占的位置，而且很明白隻要他一開口，全家就不得不服從他的意願。舉個例子，我記得有一次老爺在教區的集市上買來一對小馬，給他們一人一匹。黑思克裏夫挑了那最漂亮的一匹，可是不久它跛了，當他一發現這種情況，他就對亨得利說： “你得和我換馬。我不喜歡我那匹了。你要是不肯，我就告訴你爸爸，你這周打過我三次，還要把我的胳膊給他看，現在還一直發青，直到肩膀上都有呢。” 亨得利伸出舌頭，又摑了他幾個耳光。 “你最好現在就換，”他堅持著，逃到門廊上（他倆那會兒是在馬號裏）又堅持說： “你非換不可，要是我說出來你打我，你可要連本帶息再挨一頓揍。” “滾開，你這狗東西！”亨得利大叫道，拿稱土豆和幹草的鐵秤砣嚇唬他。 “你扔啊，”他答道，站著不動，“我要告訴他，說你怎麽吹牛，等他一死你就要把我趕出家門，看他會不會馬上把你趕出去。” 亨得利真扔了，打在他的胸口，他倒了下去，可又馬上踉蹌地站起來，喘不上來氣，臉也白了。要不是我上前阻止，他真要到主人跟前，隻要把他當時的情況說明白，說出是誰惹的禍，那就會完全報了這個仇。 “吉普賽，把我的馬牽走吧，”小俄韶說，“我但願這匹馬會把你的脖子跌斷。把它牽走，你個挨刀的，你個討吃要飯的流浪漢，把我爸爸所有一切都騙去吧。隻是以後可別叫他看出你是什麽東西，小魔鬼。你給我聽好了——但願我的小馬把你的腦漿踢出來！” 黑思克裏夫去解馬韁繩，把它牽到自己的馬號裏去。他正走過馬的身後，亨得利停止謾罵，上去把他打倒在馬蹄下，也沒有停下來查看一下他剛才所說的願望是否已經實現，就快速跑掉了。我非常驚奇地看見黑思克裏夫如何冷靜地掙紮起來，繼續做他要做的事——換好馬鞍和其他要做的事情，然後在他進屋以前，先坐在一堆幹草上，壓一壓剛才這重重的一拳所引起的惡心。我隻是簡單勸他說，把這些傷痕歸罪於馬——既然他已經得到他所想要的，編個故事撒個謊他也不在乎。的確他很少拿這類事情去告狀，我原以為他不會記仇。我是完全被他蒙騙了，以後你就會知道我說這話的意思。 |
