七）最後的騎士的大蒜名言
堂吉訶德的心上人杜爾西娜（Dulcinea）是一位一位身強力壯、嗓門奇大、性格潑辣的村婦，卻被堂吉柯德視為公主或貴婦人，並稱為"托博索的杜爾西娜”。
小說《堂吉柯德》第二卷第十章，堂吉柯德對桑喬講了一段令人發笑的話：“桑喬，你覺得怎麽樣？那些魔法師有多麽恨我啊！你看，他們竟然惡毒到這個程度，剝奪我見到意中人本來麵目的快樂。事實上，我天生就是不幸的人，是逆境之箭瞄向的目標。你也看到了，桑喬，這些背信棄義的家夥不滿足於改變我的杜爾西娜的模樣，他們還把她變成了像那個令人討厭的粗鄙農婦的樣子，同時剝奪了她作為貴婦人所特有的東西，也就是那種鮮花和香水的香氣。我必須告訴你，桑喬，當我把杜爾西娜抱上她的哈克尼馬的馬背上時（也就是你說的那種馬，雖然對我來說它看起來像一隻母驢），我聞到了一股生蒜味，差點把我熏死了。”
（注：hackney，哈克尼馬，是14世紀在不列顛島開發的一種既強壯又有魅力而且小跑出眾的馬，用作一般用途的騎乘馬。）
（ “How now, Sancho? thou seest how I am hated by enchanters! And see to what a length the malice and spite they bear me go, when they seek to deprive me of the happiness it would give me to see my lady in her own proper form. The fact is I was born to be an example of misfortune, and the target and mark at which the arrows of adversity are aimed and directed. Observe too, Sancho, that these traitors were not content with changing and transforming my Dulcinea, but they transformed and changed her into a shape as mean and ill-favoured as that of the village girl yonder; and at the same time they robbed her of that which is such a peculiar property of ladies of distinction, that is to say, the sweet fragrance that comes of being always among perfumes and flowers. For I must tell thee, Sancho, that when I approached to put Dulcinea upon her hackney (as thou sayest it was, though to me it appeared a she-ass), she gave me a whiff of raw garlic that made my head reel, and poisoned my very heart.” ）
杜爾西娜的滿身蒜味暴露了她的低賤的村婦身份，因為當時的貴族女人是抗拒食大蒜的。
第二卷第三十一章，公爵夫人的保姆和桑喬發生了爭吵，情節如下：
“婊子養的！”，保姆怒不可遏，說道，“我年紀老不老，我自己會告訴上帝，用不著告訴你，你這個滿身蒜味的無賴！”她說得很大聲，公爵夫人都聽到了，轉過身來，看到保姆如此激動，眼睛發紅，就問她跟誰在吵架。
“和這位好人吵架，”保姆說：“他特別要求我去把他那隻在城堡門口的驢子放進馬廄,還舉例說，不知是在什麽地方— 幾位夫人在恭候蘭斯洛特，有女仆照看他的驢。還有，到了最後，他說我老。”
（“Son of a bitch,” said the duenna, all aglow with anger, “whether I’m old or not, it’s with God I have to reckon, not with you, you garlic-stuffed scoundrel!” and she said it so loud, that the duchess heard it, and turning round and seeing the duenna in such a state of excitement, and her eyes flaming so, asked whom she was wrangling with.
“With this good fellow here,” said the duenna, “who has particularly requested me to go and put an ass of his that is at the castle gate into the stable, holding it up to me as an example that they did the same I don’t know where—that some ladies waited on one Lancelot, and duennas on his hack; and what is more, to wind up with, he called me old.” ）
（注：Lancelot， 蘭斯洛特，是亞瑟王的圓桌騎士團的成員之一。他出現在很多法國小說和文學作品中，他被描述為亞瑟王最偉大最受信任的騎士）。
通過閱讀這部小說的英文版本，我發現西班牙人用“滿身蒜味”（garlic-stuffed）來咒罵鄉巴佬。
第二卷第三十五章，堂吉柯德與桑喬發生了爭執，也用了“滿身蒜味”一詞。情景如下：
“順其自然吧！”桑喬說：“別說打三千鞭子，就是打三鞭子，也和我用匕首捅自己三刀一樣疼。那個魔鬼用這種方法來解除魔法！我看不出我的臀部與魔法有什麽關係。上帝啊，如果梅爾林大人找不到另外的方法解除托博索的杜爾西娜夫人所遭受的魔法，還是讓她帶著魔法進墳墓吧。”
“但是我會帶著你，滿身蒜味的小醜，”堂吉柯德說：“然後把你綁在樹上，一絲不掛，就像你母親剛把你生出來那樣。打你六千六百鞭子，而不是三千三百鞭子，而且要打得結結實實的，即使你掙紮三千三百次也掙脫不了。別再和我頂嘴，否則我就宰了你。”
“By all that’s good,” exclaimed Sancho at this, “I’ll just as soon give myself three stabs with a dagger as three, not to say three thousand, lashes. The devil take such a way of disenchanting! I don’t see what my backside has got to do with enchantments. By God, if Senor Merlin has not found out some other way of disenchanting the lady Dulcinea del Toboso, she may go to her grave enchanted.”
“But I’ll take you, Don Clown stuffed with garlic,” said Don Quixote, “and tie you to a tree as naked as when your mother brought you forth, and give you, not to say three thousand three hundred, but six thousand six hundred lashes, and so well laid on that they won’t be got rid of if you try three thousand three hundred times; don’t answer me a word or I’ll tear your soul out.”
第二卷第五十章，桑喬的老婆特雷莎和女兒桑奇卡聽說桑喬當了總督後，非常開心，想坐馬車去京城。母女之間有一段開心的對話，如下：
“為什麽不呢，媽媽！”桑卡奇說； “對上帝來說，今天就是今天，而不是明天。即使別人看見我和媽媽坐在車上，說，‘你們看那個垃圾，那個滿身蒜味的家夥的女兒，舒舒服服地坐在馬車上，像個女教皇！’讓他們去踩爛泥吧，我可得乘車，腳不沾地。背後說人壞話的人永遠倒大黴。‘反正我暖和了，他們隨便笑吧。’我說的對嗎，媽媽？”
“你說得太對了，孩子，”特雷莎說。 “所有這些好運，以後還會更多，我的好桑喬都向我預言過了。你看著吧，我的女兒，他還會讓我當上伯爵夫人……”
（“And why not, mother!” said Sanchica; “would to God it were to-day instead of to-morrow, even though they were to say when they saw me seated in the coach with my mother, ‘See that rubbish, that garlic-stuffed fellow’s daughter, how she goes stretched at her ease in a coach as if she was a she-pope!’ But let them tramp through the mud, and let me go in my coach with my feet off the ground. Bad luck to backbiters all over the world; ‘let me go warm and the people may laugh.’ Do I say right, mother?”
“To be sure you do, my child,” said Teresa; “and all this good luck, and even more, my good Sancho foretold me; and thou wilt see, my daughter, he won’t stop till he has made me a countess……)
母女的對話進一步證明桑喬是很喜歡吃大蒜的。
這部巨著裏被後人引用最多的關於大蒜的名言，是堂吉柯德對桑喬的那句勸誡：“不要吃大蒜和洋蔥，免得他們從氣味中發現你是鄉巴佬。”（Eat not garlic nor onions, lest they find out thy boorish origin by the smell）。這句話出現在第二卷第四十三章，堂吉柯德口若懸河，教育桑喬如何做一個好總督和上等人。塞萬提斯（Miguel de Cervantes ，1547-1616)通過堂吉柯德之口表達了作者本人對領導藝術的見解。現將部分金句翻譯如下：
“誰聽了堂吉柯德上述這番話，不會把他當成一個足智多謀、見識遠大的人呢？不過，就像這部巨著經常記述的那樣，他隻有在談到騎士精神時才胡說八道，而在討論其他話題時，他的見解清晰公道，所以他時時出現言行不符的情況。但他給桑喬的第二部分忠告時，他表現出一種活潑的幽默感，充分展現著他的智慧和愚蠢。”
（Who, hearing the foregoing discourse of Don Quixote, would not have set him down for a person of great good sense and greater rectitude of purpose? But, as has been frequently observed in the course of this great history, he only talked nonsense when he touched on chivalry, and in discussing all other subjects showed that he had a clear and unbiassed understanding; so that at every turn his acts gave the lie to his intellect, and his intellect to his acts; but in the case of these second counsels that he gave Sancho, he showed himself to have a lively turn of humour, and displayed conspicuously his wisdom, and also his folly. ）
“桑喬全神貫注地聽著，努力地將這些忠告記在腦子裏，以便遵照這些話做個好總督。堂吉柯德接著說道：
‘關於如何管理你自己和你的家，桑喬，我給你的首要任務是保持清潔，要剪指甲，不要像某些人那樣，留著長長的指甲，無知地以為長長的指甲使他們的雙手更美，似乎他們疏於切割的多餘物是指甲，而不是捉捕蜥蜴的獵鷹的爪子 – 一種肮髒和悖逆天道的陋習。’
‘不要衣冠不整、邋邋遢遢的，桑喬。因為衣冠不整是精神不振的一種征兆，除非是故意用邋遢和懈怠來騙人的，就像人們對凱撒大帝的普遍看法那樣。”
（Sancho listened to him with the deepest attention, and endeavoured to fix his counsels in his memory, like one who meant to follow them and by their means bring the full promise of his government to a happy issue. Don Quixote, then, went on to say:
“With regard to the mode in which thou shouldst govern thy person and thy house, Sancho, the first charge I have to give thee is to be clean, and to cut thy nails, not letting them grow as some do, whose ignorance makes them fancy that long nails are an ornament to their hands, as if those excrescences they neglect to cut were nails, and not the talons of a lizard-catching kestrel—a filthy and unnatural abuse.
“Go not ungirt and loose, Sancho; for disordered attire is a sign of an unstable mind, unless indeed the slovenliness and slackness is to be set down to craft, as was the common opinion in the case of Julius Caesar. ）
“謹慎地確認你的職位的價值。如果你想給你的傭人們做製服，給他們大方實惠的，不要花裏胡哨的。把這些服裝分給你的傭人和窮人，也就是說，如果你做六件製服，分三件給傭人，三件給窮人，這樣你在天堂和人間都有人伺候了。那些目空一切的人從不會想到這種做衣服的辦法。
“不要吃大蒜和洋蔥，免得他們從氣味中發現你是鄉巴佬。走路要慢，說話要從容，不過不要小聲得像說給自己聽，因為所有的裝腔作勢都是不好的。”
“飲食要節製，尤其晚飯要吃得更少，因為身體健康全靠胃消化得好。
（“Ascertain cautiously what thy office may be worth; and if it will allow thee to give liveries to thy servants, give them respectable and serviceable, rather than showy and gay ones, and divide them between thy servants and the poor; that is to say, if thou canst clothe six pages, clothe three and three poor men, and thus thou wilt have pages for heaven and pages for earth; the vainglorious never think of this new mode of giving liveries.
“Eat not garlic nor onions, lest they find out thy boorish origin by the smell; walk slowly and speak deliberately, but not in such a way as to make it seem thou art listening to thyself, for all affectation is bad.
“Dine sparingly and sup more sparingly still; for the health of the whole body is forged in the workshop of the stomach. ）
“喝酒要節製，要記住酒喝多了不容易保守秘密，又誤事。”
“注意，桑喬，吃東西時不要狼吞虎咽，不要在別人麵前打嗝。”
（“Be temperate in drinking, bearing in mind that wine in excess keeps neither secrets nor promises.
“Take care, Sancho, not to chew on both sides, and not to eruct in anybody’s presence.” ）
……….
“同樣，桑喬，”堂吉柯德說，“你說話時不要混入那麽多俗語。雖然俗語是簡短的格言，但你確實經常牽強附會說了太多，聽起來不像格言，更像胡說八道。”
（“Likewise, Sancho,” said Don Quixote, “thou must not mingle such a quantity of proverbs in thy discourse as thou dost; for though proverbs are short maxims, thou dost drag them in so often by the head and shoulders that they savour more of nonsense than of maxims.”）
……
“你騎馬時，身子不要懶洋洋地往後仰，也不要直著兩條腿或不夾馬肚子，騎馬時不要像騎你的驢子那樣吊兒郎當的。有些人騎馬像紳士，有些人就像馬夫。
“不要貪睡，不早起的人浪費了一個白天。記住，桑喬，勤奮是成功之母，相反的，懶惰永遠達不到既定目標。
“我現在要給你的最後一個忠告，盡管並不能使身體得到改善，但我希望你永遠記住它，因為我相信，它對你的作用將不亞於我已經給你的那些忠告。這就是- 永遠不要參與有關家世的爭執，至少不要互相比較，一比就會有高低，被你比下去的會憎恨你，比你高的也不會抬舉你。”
“你應該穿緊身長褲，配長緊身外套，鬥篷也要長些。千萬不要穿肥馬褲，因為紳士和總督穿肥馬褲都不好看。 ”
(“When thou ridest on horseback, do not go lolling with thy body on the back of the saddle, nor carry thy legs stiff or sticking out from the horse’s belly, nor yet sit so loosely that one would suppose thou wert on Dapple; for the seat on a horse makes gentlemen of some and grooms of others.
“Be moderate in thy sleep; for he who does not rise early does not get the benefit of the day; and remember, Sancho, diligence is the mother of good fortune, and indolence, its opposite, never yet attained the object of an honest ambition.
“The last counsel I will give thee now, though it does not tend to bodily improvement, I would have thee carry carefully in thy memory, for I believe it will be no less useful to thee than those I have given thee already, and it is this—never engage in a dispute about families, at least in the way of comparing them one with another; for necessarily one of those compared will be better than the other, and thou wilt be hated by the one thou hast disparaged, and get nothing in any shape from the one thou hast exalted.
“Thy attire shall be hose of full length, a long jerkin, and a cloak a trifle longer; loose breeches by no means, for they are becoming neither for gentlemen nor for governors. )
（注： Dapple是桑喬的驢子的名字）
