借春天寫字花園
看看，想想，寫寫
另類“望子成龍”
Alternative Great Expectations
剛剛讀完多倫多作家David Gilmour的《電影俱樂部》“The Film Club”。書中講述了作者和他兒子一起度過的三年難忘歲月。
I just finished a book called The Film Club by a
Jesse 是作者和他前妻 Maggie 的兒子，父母離婚後他和媽媽住在一起。“他本性善良而高傲，不願意做他不感興趣的任何事情，即使他知道這會給他帶來什麽後果。” Maggie 覺得 Jesse 的生活裏如果有個男人可能會改變這種狀況，於是讓 David 與他的現任妻子 Tina 和 Jesse 住到了一起。但這並沒有使事情好轉， Jesse 仍舊不做作業，逃學。有一天父親讓當時十六歲的兒子仔細想一想他到底還要不要上學。三天之後 Jesse 說他再也不想上學了。父親聽後心裏一沉，但還是同意了兒子的決定，不過提出了他一個條件：你可以不上學，不工作，不付房租，但必須每周看三個由我選擇的電影。 Jesse 喜出望外，立即答應。
Jesse was the author and his ex-wife Maggie's son, who lived with his mother after his parents divorced. “He was a sweet-natured boy, very proud, who seemed incapable of doing anything he wasn’t interested in, no matter how much the consequences worried him.”
Maggie thought if there’s a man in his life, the situation would be changed. So David and his wife Tina moved in with Jesse. But nothing improved, even when Jesse was sent to a private school, he still didn’t do his homework and skipped classes. One day the father let his sixteen-year-old son to think about whether or not he wanted to go to school anymore. After three days, Jesse made a decision of not going to school. David’s stomach fluttered, but he agreed and told Jesse that he wouldn’t have to work, he could sleep for the whole day, he wouldn’t have to pay the rent, and couldn’t use drugs. But there’s one thing he must do: he must watch three films every week with him, the films chosen by him. Jesse almost couldn’t believe this unconventional deal.
於是父子倆開始了他們長達三年的 “ 電影俱樂部 ” 。作者本人曾是個專欄作家，影評家，主持過采訪名人的電視節目，做過電視記錄片。他根據自己幾十年的生活工作經曆，精心挑選了他認為是電影史上最好的一些電影和兒子一起觀看。雖然有些他覺得非常優秀的電影在 Jesse 那裏並沒有得到如期的共鳴，但對電影的探討促使他們展開了一次又一次父子之間的誠摯對話。他們不僅談電影，談角色，談表演，還不可避免地談現實，談青春，談性，談愛情，談工作， 談錢，談人生。
So the father and son started their three-years-long Film Club. David had been a film critic for CBC television, an author, and once hosted TV and radio interviews with publicities and documentary programs. He carefully chose best and proper movies (at least he thought so) for Jesse and watched them together with him. Although for some films, Jesse didn’t see what David had seen and had not been as impressed as David expected. However, movies did open their discussions, honest discussions about the reality, youth, sex, girls, friendship, work, money and life.
在這三年之中， Jesse 先是無所事事，後來做過電話市場推銷員。第一次是為一個詐騙公司推銷一份根本不存在的所謂《救火隊員》雜誌，而後是向美國南部的貧困家庭推銷信用卡。後來他在餐館洗過碗 - 正當做父親的覺得他不會將這種低收入的苦工做長的時候，他被提升為見習廚師。 Jesse 還經曆了讓他幸福，迷茫，傷心欲絕的兩次戀愛。在他痛苦萬分的時候不僅以酒澆愁，更試過用毒品來麻醉自己，有一次用後由於心跳過速而進了醫院。他還迷上了音樂，和朋友一起建起了一個名為 “ 腐敗的懷舊 ”“CORRUPTED NOSTALGIA” 的小樂隊，自寫自唱。
At the beginning of this three year period, Jesse didn’t do anything. Then he got jobs in telemarketing, first for a company promoting an nonexistent magazine “Fireman”, and then for another company selling credit cards to poor families in the deep south of US. After that he washed dishes in a local restaurant, and just when the father doubted how long he could endure low-paying jobs and drudgery, he was promoted to be a prep chef.
Jesse also experienced two love affairs which resembled sitting on a emotional rollercoaster which sent him to the peak of happiness and then to the bottom of deepest agony and misery. He tried to numb his pain by alcohol and even drugs. One overdose sent him to emergency room with a fast heart beat. Jesse always liked music, he and his friends built up a band called “Corrupted Nostalgia”, they performed songs written by themselves.
而 David 在這段期間則遭遇了沒有新工作合約，經濟窘迫，到處求職而不得，甚至還有曾想做一個自行車快遞都被拒絕的經曆。而最使他不安的是他總是在懷疑自己當初同意兒子退學的決定是否正確，是否會斷送了他的一生。在和兒子的交往中也使他常常反省自己。但同時他又感受到了和兒子的關係越來越親密，牢固，超出了一般的父子關係。他能立即感受到 Jesse 的點滴變化， 他發現 “Jesse 已經可以做他不喜歡但又應該做的事，並能把它做好。 ”
For David, it was a difficult time too. He didn’t get any new contracts and was at the brink of bankruptcy. He contacted old friends and colleagues to let them know that he was looking for job. Once he even tried to apply for a bike courier position, but never got a response. The intense and constant worry that continually bothered him was his decision to let Jesse drop out of school, he was afraid that this may destroy Jesse’s future. He was often self-questioning, not only for Jesse’s sake, but also for his own. But in the meantime he could feel that the bond between him and Jesse became stronger and their relationship was beyond father and son. He could feel any slight changes in Jesse immediately, and also found that “when Jesse had to do, he could do even shittiest job and make a go of it”.
在父親的幫助下，在現實生活的磨礪中，在看過的電影的有意無意的絲絲滲入之下， Jesse 慢慢地從一個愛鬧事的少年成長為一個有主見的年輕人。他展現了他的音樂才能，把自己的感情寫到歌裏去。愛情讓他受傷但也讓他成長，他對愛情依然純真。他對電影的知識和自身的理解使他成為一個很不錯的業餘評論家（ David 為了獎賞他對電影的深刻理解，精辟評價和豐富的知識，曾請他在一家高級餐廳裏吃晚飯），知識麵也相對擴大，他的曆史文學水平也都有所提高。三年後他終於覺得自己需要有係統地學習，需要新的知識來充實自己。他做出了重返學校的決定，廢寢忘食地惡補了幾個月後終於進入了大學，開始了他人生的一個新的曆程。
With his father’s help, milled by life and maybe unconsciously influenced by the movies he had watched, Jesse gradually from a wayward lad grew up to be a self-assured young man. He showed his musical talent by pouring his feelings into the songs he was writing. Love had hurt him but also matured him, he still believed in true love. He accumulated rich knowledge of films and his comments were so pinpointed that David rewarded him with a dinner at an expensive restaurant. Movies had also improved his historical and literary knowledge. Three years later, he realized that he needed a systematic study, he needed knowledge to enrich himself. So he made another decision – to go back to school. He signed on a “punishing” three-month crash course and worked hard day and night. Finally, he made it, he entered a university and opened a new chapter of his life.
每一位家長都希望自己的孩子能夠在生活中獲得成功，而作者這種與東方傳統教育習慣方式大相徑庭的做法真使我出乎意料。在讀書過程中，我一邊慶幸自己沒有這麽叛逆的孩子，一邊又半懷疑半佩服作者的大膽做法。他的耐心，他的循循善誘，他對兒子的開放程度都很超出我的想象，也是我所不及的。
Every parent longs for their child to have a successful life. The author’s educational methods to his son is almost opposite to the Eastern way, which really was beyond my expectations. When I read it, I felt so blessed that I don’t have such a rebellious child and meanwhile I doubted but also admired the author’s brave decision. His patience, instructive teaching and openness totally surprised me, and I did learn something from him.
這是一本非常紀實，坦白的書，就像作者和他兒子之間的談話一樣。作者毫不掩飾地展示了 Jesse 在成長過程中所經曆的一切 - 青春的燥動，對異性的認知，對自我價值的承認和否定，以及對未來的迷茫。在對 Jesse 的觀察，幫助，引導過程中也映射了作者本人的人生觀和心路曆程。
This is an honest and frank book, just like the conversations between the father and son. The author revealed everything Jesse encountered during his transformation: adolescent turmoil, feelings towards girls, self-judgment and confusions about the future. It also reflected the author’s own views and insight through his observing and guiding of Jesse.
作者不愧是個資深撰稿人及評論家，文字簡練，凝重而又不失詼諧，對電影的評價，對人物描述往往是一針見血。他在寫到作為父親看到兒子因戀愛而受傷卻無能為力隻能旁觀時的心痛，讓讀者感覺身臨其境，深切體會到了他對兒子的愛。
The author is a really experienced writer and critic. His words are simple, imposing and with humor. His film’s comments and character descriptions are pleasantly concise. His own desperate pain when he saw Jesse hurt by love, but being unable to provide comfort grabs the reader’s heart. His love to Jesse was exposed vividly and completely.
作者在書中介紹了大量的優秀電影，演員和導演。遺憾的是我隻看過其中少數的幾個。
The book also introduced a lot of excellent movies, but unfortunately I have only seen few.
這是我今年看過的非小說類書中最引人入勝的一本。
It is a page-turner and is the most attractive non-fiction book I’ve read this year.
