生活裏的數學

朋友發來Email，看了以後不僅笑出聲來。又到周末了，希望這篇也能給其他朋友帶去同樣的效果。
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OFFICE MATH (辦公室數學)
Smart boss + smart employee = profit ( 精明的老板＋精明的雇員＝帶來利潤 )
Smart boss + dumb employee = production ( 精明的老板＋愚蠢的雇員＝生產成果 )
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion ( 愚蠢的老板＋精明的雇員＝促進銷售 )
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime ( 愚蠢的老板＋愚蠢的雇員＝加班加點 )

ROMANCE MATH ( 浪漫數學 )
Smart man + smart woman = romance ( 精明的男人＋精明的女人＝浪漫愛情 )
Smart man + dumb woman = affair ( 精明的男人＋愚蠢的女人＝婚外私通 )
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage ( 愚蠢的男人＋精明的女人＝結婚生活 )
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy ( 愚蠢的男人＋愚蠢的女人＝身懷六甲 )

HAPPINESS MATH ( 幸福數學 )
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little
( 要想與一個男人幸福地相守，你必須對他理解多點，愛的少點 )
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all
( 要想與一個女人幸福地生活，你必須盡量愛她多點，而不要試圖去理解她 )

CHANGE MATH ( 變化數學 )
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't
( 女人嫁給一個男人，希望他會發生改變，而他卻做不到 )
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does
( 男人娶一個女人，希望她不會變化，而她卻改變了 )

DEBATE MATH ( 爭論數學 )
A woman has the last word in any argument
( 女人對任何爭論都擁有最後的決斷 )
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
( 任何問題在男人提出來之後都會變成一場新的爭論 )

SHOPPING MATH ( 購物數學 )
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs
( 男人總是花 20 塊錢買他需要的價值10 塊錢的東西 )
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need
( 女人總是花 10 塊錢買她不需要的價值20塊錢的東西 )

LONGEVITY MATH ( 長壽數學 )
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
( 已婚男人比單身男人活得長，但已婚男人往往比單身男人更願死去 )

GENERAL MATH ( 通俗數學 )
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband
( 女人在找到老公之前總是為未來擔心 )
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife
( 男人在找到老婆之後才開始擔心未來 )
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend
( 成功男人的標誌是他掙的錢足夠他太太花費 )
A successful woman is one who can find such a man
( 成功女人的標誌是她找到了這樣的先生 )




PLEASE SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW CAN HANDLE IT.

( 請把這送給一個聰明、需要開心的女人 , 請把這送給一個聰明、可以消解本意的男人 )