隨筆
隨筆，聊天
列出一些中國人在英語寫作中常見的“毛病”。這些也是我以前常犯的“毛病”，也
是我經常看見中國人在英語寫作中犯的“毛病”。例句取自一些英語書籍(類似的例
子在中國人文章中很多)，當然也是英美人常犯的“毛病”。這裏所說的“毛病”，
不是詞匯用法和語法方麵的問題。
1) I went to the library in the afternoon. I took out a book that was on
the reading list. Then I went home to eat supper. I did not open the book
until after supper. Then I discovered that it was the wrong volume. I was
greatly annoyed. I should have looked at the book when I took it out. I
had nobody to blame but myself.
上麵的寫法冗長乏味。較好的寫法如下：
1-1) In the afternoon, I went to the library to take out a book on the reading
list. Then, armed with my book, I went home for supper. Opening the book
after supper, I was greatly annoyed; it was the wrong volume. To take out
a book without looking at it was just like me. I had nobody to blame but
myself.
2) Formerly, science was taught by the textbook method, while now the laboratory method is employed.
寫作者總是認為變一變表達式比較好。在這裏選擇相同的表達式表示寫作者堅定一
致的看法。較好的寫法如下：
2-1) Formerly, science was taught by the textbook method; now it is taught
by the laboratory method.
3) [In the present paper I propose to deal with] one type of interdisciplinary
curriculum [which] can be built upon material ...
方括號中是冗餘部分，可以不要。這種冗餘寫法在科技論文中常見。
4) Our country had vast resources but seemed almost wholly unprepared for
war. But within a year it had created an army of four million.
一個 but 緊接另一個 but ，形成“對比--對比”的不好結構。重新安排句子後，
較好的寫法如下：
4-1) Our country seemed almost wholly unprepared for war. But it had vast
resources. Within a year it had created an army of four million.
5) Your cover letter should include information about your present employment
and why you want to change jobs.
寫法要對稱和均衡。較好的寫法如下：
5-1) Your cover letter should include information about your present employment and explain why you want to change jobs.
6) He has worked for the bank for many years, is knowledgeable about all
areas of banking, and will be an excellent addition to top management.
相同的問題如 5)。較好的寫法如下：
6-1) Employed by the bank for many years and knowledgeable about all areas
of banking, he will be an excellent addition to top management.
7) Most married actors either worked a second job, appeared in commercials
or their wives worked.
句子係列失去控製。最後部分應改一下， 如：
7-1) Most married actors either worked a second job, appeared in commercials
or had wives who worked.
8) The skier swished over the crest, his skis chattering across the ice granules
the morning sun had yet to melt. He pumped his arms for added speed, and
he shouted his enthusiasm into the cavernous morning cold ...
一般寫作都強調使用主動語態。但適當地使用被動態可以避免單調：
8-1) The skier swished over the crest, his skis chattering across the ice
granules that had not been melted by the morning sun. Speed was increased
by pumping his arms, and he shouted his enthusiasm into the cavernous morning cold ...
