兒子的困惑

兒子在長大。那個小腦瓜大概一天到晚的轉個不停。時不時，會冒出一些讓人捧腹的東西來。

(I)“I don't want to go to a college.”

上周五，一到家，媽媽就告訴我，兒子在回家的路上，給媽媽說：“I don't want to go to a college.”

俺趕緊問正在一個人玩牌的兒子：“What's going on?”

他回答說：“You said to J.J. that it's very expensive for going to a college.”

想起來了， 幾天前， 我帶他們去買東西， 和女兒談起過上大學的事。他也聽到了。知道“free”對兒子有魔力， 就說：“If you arealways No. 1 in your school, you might get a FREE ride for college--no need to pay anything.”

“Really?”

“That's why I always ask you and J.J.to study hard.”
。。。。。。

希望這是他學習的動力喲。

(II). “What am I going to be?”

上周一天早晨起來， 問老爸：“So, you are going to be old someday, right?”

“Right. When you grow up, I will be old.”

“ Then, J.J. will have her own family, her kids. right?”

“Right.”

“You will be a grandpa, mom will be a grandma. What am I going to be?”

“An uncle。”

“What? Is an uncle older than a grandpa?”

暈到！

（III）“I am not sure (whether)I am one of her boyfriends.”

鄰居有個女兒，和我家的兒子差不多大，經常來串門。從小就笑話他們是boyfriend/girlfriend。小時候不懂，還說“就是”呢。最近，女孩子開始懂點事，而我們家的兒子還沒明白過來。那天， 媽媽問兒子：“Is M. (女孩名）still your girlfirned?"

“I am not sure now. She has many boyfriends. I am not sure (whether) I am one of her boyfriends。”

捧腹。還好不吃醋呢。

（IV）“I will give you 10 dollars everyday to buy McDonald's..”

兒子總是想著從爸爸這裏搞點錢，放他的錢包裏。老爸會說：“This is my money. I better save for myself--you know, when I am old and can't work, I have to have money to buy food for myself.”

“ Don't worry, daddy. When you are old, I will give you 10 dollars everyday to buy McDonalds.”

不錯， 還有十塊錢呢。就不知道到那時，他是否能自作主張。

(V)“Daddy and J.J. are the richest people in the world.”

財迷兒子最喜歡數他的錢。他有７０多塊錢，放在一個大錢袋裏，時不時要拿出來數數。家裏的現金，是媽媽保管，他知道在那裏，也會去“幫”媽媽數。他把那些現金當成媽媽的錢。他經常發現媽媽的錢比他的還少。“Poor mom.” 他經常會對媽媽這樣說。

打聽J.J.和爸爸在銀行裏的錢，是他的業餘“愛好”，也可能著急媽媽沒錢了，誰買吃的。上周在飯桌上又來打聽。老爸在看學校來的東西，隨口就答了：“１０ thousand dollars.”

兒子跟著就問J.J.的錢， 老爸頭也沒抬，說：“３ thousand.”說完了， 才反應過來，抬頭一看兒子， 兒子是一臉的驚訝和羨慕：“Wow, Daddy and J.J. are the richest people in the world.”

嗯， 看來知道他那７０塊錢是小數目了。以後和爸爸討價還價會更勤了。

(9/11/2006)