王國鵬
一天，和一位英國朋友閑聊。他問我：“中英兩國，你較喜歡哪個國家?” 我稍作思索後，回答說：“說實在，兩地都有喜歡的地方。不過，當初我要是知道中國發展得如此迅速，我也許會留在中國，不會到這裏來。”
上世紀八十年代，中國的許多大城市卷起一陣“讀書出國風”’。到了八十年代後期，這股風升級成了“出國熱”，讀不讀書也希望到國外走走。一九八八年秋，在幾個要好的朋友的鼓勵下，我也不知不覺地加入了這行列。經過幾個月的準備之後，我終於於一九九八年踏出了國門，從此離開了生我養我的國土以及伴陪我一起長大的朋友和多年同甘共苦的同事，隻身來到萬裏迢迢的英國。一年多後，我又辦理手續把妻子擔保了過來。就這樣，我們便在異國他響開始了新的生活。一轉眼，快十五年過去了。
十五年在歷史的長河裏隻不過是一舜間，然而這卻是人生中的青壯時期，是無比寶貴的時光。這十五年裏，我曾在餐館做過雜工，又做過外賣店生意，接著到本地人的公司做過短工，後來又轉行做進出口生意。這期間雖沒多大成就，但憑著不怕吃苦、隻求兩餐溫飽的精神和省衣節食的持家美德，這日子還算是過得去的。
記得初抵英國時由於文化背景、飲食習慣及語言等方麵的不同，我在生活上的確遇到了許多不便之處。在中國，人們習慣早餐吃粥粉麵或點心，而這裏則吃烤麵包、麥片、雞蛋和鹹肉等幹量似的食品。喝茶也有差別，中國人泡茶從不加糖不加奶。當然這些還算不上是什麽樣的障礙，你不想吃西餐那就自己動手做麵，不就解決問題了嗎？最頭疼的還是求職。英國的生活水準比中國的高出好幾倍，沒有固定的收人是無法長久頂下去的，所以我一安頓下來就忙著去找工作。但凡是曾經在英國求過職的人都知道，外國拿來的工作經驗是沒多大用途的；即使是一般的職位也得看你有否本地的工作經驗。所以中國來的求職者隻有到中餐館找尋工作。在中國我本來是在政府部門工作的，平時連廚房也很少進過去，現在倒當起廚工來，這種落差是很大的。所以在廚房打工的日子裏，開頭真有點想不通、吃不消，笨手笨腳的常鬧笑話。好在老板是開明人，同事又熱心幫助，再加上自己認真地去熟識業務，不久也就漸漸上了手。兩個月後老板還給我加了點工資，而且說這是破例給半職的夥計加薪。我自己的遭遇總的說來還不算太壞。反而我的一些朋友比我吃的苦頭還多。有位曾經在國內當翳生的朋友，就曾被他的老板的兒子挖苦過。一天，小老板問他：“喂，大陸是否沒飯吃，要不你吃這麼多？” 朋友聽了心裏不是滋味。後來他自己開了一間餐館，娉請工人時他要先請來見工的人吃飯，吃不下三碗飯的人他不要。
人們都說在家千日好，出門一朝難。生活在異鄉的人，大凡都會感到孤獨無援。起初，我們也遇到同樣的問題，常常在困難的時刻不知找誰幫忙。所以出門靠朋友這句話很實在，大家互相照顧，風雨同舟。日子久了，我們找到了華人社區中心，開始參加些公益活動，同時也得到不少幫助，避免了許多麻煩。但近年英國的經濟不太景氣，政府的負擔日益繁重，給社區的資助也漸漸減少。各地社區機構大都麵臨基金短缺的困難，華人社區也不例外。這不論對新移民老華僑，都是很不幸的事。
再看中國那邊，隋著經濟的不斷發展，國民收入漸漸提高，老百姓的生活水平與十多年前我離開時的情況相比已大大不一樣。以前的那些朋友、同事都紛紛搬進了新的房子，不少人還買了汽車，而且還是名貴牌子的。有的人還顧用了一個甚至幾個管家工人，大小家務和小孩全都由工人操勞。而他們自己下班後就到餐館舞廳或俱樂部去，跳交際舞啦，唱卡拉奧凱啦，按摩錘骨啦，坐桑拿沐啦… … 都是頭等的享受。有幾次我約他們一起上館子，“買單”’ 都是他們搶著來，硬說我是“來賓”，不準我破費。說實在，不比還不說，相比起來，在這裏我每天除了上班之外，回家後還得做大堆大堆的家務，包括做飯洗衣照顧小孩等，哪來空閑的時間去消遣呢。不說你不信，十幾年來我連電影也很少去看，桑拿按摸就更不貼邊了。所以每當跟那邊的朋友提起我的現狀時，他們都拿我來開玩笑，說我在“修道行苦僧”。記得出國前有親人對我說：“你命中要出國，而且走得越遠越好”。現在，我走得夠遠的了，但“好”字還沒出現。如今，即使想回去碰碰運氣重新謀發展，又非要“如今邁步從頭越”，談何容易。所以我想還是入響隋俗，落葉生根罷了。既來之，則安之，我要在這片土地上繼續耕耘，靜待黎明，希望“好”運氣早日出現。
Tie
One day, I was chatting with an English friend. He asked me, ‘Which country do you like best, Britain or China?’ ‘To be frank’, I said after a brief thought, ‘I like both countries. But had I known that China would become what it is today, I would probably have chosen to stay there’.
In the early1980s, lots of young people in China wanted to go abroad to pursue their studies. Until the late 1980s, even non-students wanted to leave the country to try their luck. In the autumn of 1988, with the help of some friends, I too found myself joining the departing party. After a few months of preparation, I at long last made the exit, leaving behind the land where I had spent my youthful years, and my close mates, relatives and colleagues, to come to Britain - on the other side of the globe. One year later, I applied for my wife to come over as well. From then on, we began to settle in a new homeland, where we have lived for the past fifteen years.
Fifteen years are a short period in history. But this is probably the most spectacular and precious period of a person’s life. During the past fifteen years, I have worked in various places. First I worked in a restaurant; then I run a takeaway food shop, and later worked for a short while in a non-Chinese firm. Eventually I ended up doing imports and exports business. I have done nothing spectacular though, except that being able to feed the mouths. On the whole life has been okay. After all we have worked very hard.
I remember when I first arrived, I did actually face quite a few problems, due to the fact that I had come from a different cultural background, that I did not speak much English and that I had been accustomed to eating rice but not much else all along. In China we used to have noodles, dim-sum and the like for breakfast, here I had to familiarize myself with bread, cornflakes, eggs, ham and so on. Even the way people make their tea is different. But of course these are after all minor things. Sooner or later you would have to be accustomed to all these anyway. Just like if you don’t want to have bread for breakfast, you can always prepare noodles instead. And that isn’t really a big problem. What caused headache most was finding work. The living standard in the UK is much higher than that in China so the cost of living is high. Without a job you simply cannot survive. So as soon as I found a place to stay I began to find work. But finding employment in the UK is not as easy as it sounds. The experience that you bring in from other countries does not always help. Even ordinary vacancies require the job-seeker to have some UK gained experience. That’s why most people from China eventually end up working in the catering industry. Before coming over here I worked in a local government department. I had hardly gone in the kitchen, let alone working in it. So when I eventually found a job in a Chinese kitchen, I really did feel bad. For the first few months I was simply coping, as I made many mistakes and even became a laughing stock for the others who also worked there. Unfortunately my boss was quite kind to me, and the colleagues were on the whole helpful. To make up my lack of skills I worked very hard too. After a few months I gradually became familiar with what I was doing. My boss was happy to see me making progress and decided to raise my wage a bit, which was rather usually as he said he had never raised a part time worker’s wage before within such a short period of service. So my own experience in the kitchen wasn’t entirely negative. By contrast some of my friends had even more problems. One person, in particular, who had been a doctor in China before coming over here, had once been humiliated by his boss’s son, who asked him: ‘Hey. Did you have enough to eat in China? I wonder why you eat so much?’ My friend felt embarrassed. Later he opened a restaurant of his own. When he interviewed job applicants for his kitchen, he would check if they could eat a lot. Whoever failed to finish three bowls of rice would not be offered the job.
There is saying that ‘No place like home’. Most people living faraway from their home feel alienated. This was exactly what we felt when we firs came, when we could find nobody to ask for help. Truly it is necessary to have friends when you are out there, so that you can seek support and offer support when possible. So later when we found a Chinese community centre we would involve ourselves in the activities; from there we were able to seek further assistance elsewhere. Lately though the UK’s economy has not been particularly good, so that the government is in short of resources. For this reason there are less and less funds for the voluntary sector. This means most grassroots community organisations are facing financial problems. It is rather unfortunate for ethnic minority groups like ourselves.
Meanwhile, in China, the economy there has been developing quite fast over the years. Average income has gone up so that in general people’s living standard has gone up, too. Many of my former colleagues have moved into new houses; quite few of them have had their family car, even luxury ones. Some of them even hire domestic helpers to handle the chores, so that they don’t have to do anything after work. Instead they spend time in dance halls and restaurants, massage salons, enjoying a rather luxury life style. When I visited them in China, they treated me with big dinners in expensive hotels. Compared with my life over here, theirs is really colourful. Here I would I have to do lots of chores, like cooking, washing up and looking after the children. I hardly I have time for what they are having over there in China. Indeed over the past ten years I had hardly had time for cinema, let alone massage and so on. So every time I talk about my life here they would laugh at me and brand me a ‘poor monk in the temple’. I remember just before I was leaving China, someone from my extended family told me my fortune and said that ‘you fate rests beyond the ocean and the farther you go, the richer you will become’. Well, apparently I am now outside China; but I have yet to taste the luck of being loaded with cash. So sometimes I do think of going back to China and start things anew. But starting things from scratch is no easy job. It seems I may have to abandon the idea altogether and resign to the prospect of opportunities here. Whatever difficulties I may face, I should remain positive, waiting for a brighter future and hoping for the best to come.
By Robin Wang Translated by Cao Yuan
