撤退的風, etc -- 露易絲.格呂克

 

露易絲.格呂克
(Louise Gluck)
新當選的美國國會圖書館桂冠詩人露易絲.格呂克1943年生於紐約，在哥倫比亞大學師從絲坦利.庫尼茨，後在威廉姆絲學院獲得了法律學位，畢業後曾在哥達德學院教書。出版有詩集《七個時代》（TheSevenAges2001），《新生》（VitaNova1999,獲得《波士頓圖書評論》主辦的“賓漢詩歌獎”），《草地》（Meadowlands1996），《野鳶尾》（TheWildIris1992,獲普利策詩歌獎和美國詩歌協會“W．C．威廉姆絲詩歌獎”），《阿拉若山》（Ararat1990,獲R．C．羅比特國家詩歌獎），《阿喀琉絲的勝利》（TheTriumphofAchilles1985,獲美國的全國書評獎）。格呂克還出版過一些評論及散文集。1999年當選為美國詩歌學會理事。2003年8月28日，美國國會圖書館在華盛頓宣布，普利策獎得主、著名女詩人露易絲.格呂克當選為新的美國國會圖書館桂冠詩人。

撤退的風

當我做成你們,我就愛著你們.
現在我憐憫你們.

我給了你們所需的一切:
大地之床,藍天毛毯—

隨著我進一步遠離你們
我就更加看清楚你們.
你們的心靈如今應很闊大
它們不該是
多嘴的小東西—

我給了你們每一樣禮物,
蔚藍的春之晨,
時間之多你們都不知該怎樣利用—
你們索要更多的禮物,那個為
另外的生物準備的禮物.

不論你們希望什麽,
你們將不會在花園中在成長的植物中,
找到你們自己.
你們的生活不象它們那樣是循環的:

你們的生活是鳥兒飛翔
在平靜中開始和結束—
開始和結束,以類似這
弧形從白樺樹
至蘋果樹.

Retreating Wind

When I made you, I loved you.
Now I pity you.

I gave you all you needed:
bed of earth, blanket of blue air--

As I get further away from you
I see you more clearly.
Your souls should have been immense by now,
not what they are,
small talking things--

I gave you every gift,
blue of the spring morning,
time you didn't know how to use--
you wanted more, the one gift
reserved for another creation.

Whatever you hoped,
you will not find yourselves in the garden,
among the growing plants.
Your lives are not circular like theirs:

your lives are the bird's flight
which begins and ends in stillness--
which begins and ends, in form echoing
this arc from the white birch
to the apple tree.

 

恐懼埋葬

在那空場地,在早晨,
那具屍體等待著認領.
幽靈坐其旁,在一塊小岩石上—
沒什麽再來給它身形.

想著那屍體的孤獨.
夜晚在修剪過的場地上踱步,
它的影子緊緊連接著四周.
如此一個漫長的旅途.

已見村莊那微顫的燈光
不為它停留依舊掃掠在路上.
它們看來還很遠,
那些木門,麵包和牛奶
象重物放在桌子上.

The Fear Of Burial

In the empty field, in the morning,
the body waits to be claimed.
The spirit sits beside it, on a small rock--
nothing comes to give it form again.

Think of the body's loneliness.
At night pacing the sheared field,
its shadow buckled tightly around.
Such a long journey.

And already the remote, trembling lights of the village
not pausing for it as they scan the rows.
How far away they seem,
the wooden doors, the bread and milk
laid like weights on the table.

 

晨歌

你想知道我如何打發我的時間?
我走在前麵的草坪,假裝
除草.你應該知道
我從不跪下除草,從不自
花床拉起幾簇三葉草;其實
我正在尋找勇氣,尋找我的生活
會改變的證據,盡管
需要花很久時間,檢查
每一簇以尋找象征性的
葉子,很快夏日將終,葉子
已經轉變,總是病樹
在先,這將死的化為
亮黃色,而幾隻暗色的鳥表演
樂聲唱晚.你想看我的手嗎?
現仍是空空的就象在第一個音符上.
或是那要點沒有
標記總是連續不斷.

 

Matins

You want to know how I spend my time?
I walk the front lawn, pretending
to be weeding. You ought to know
I'm never weeding, on my knees, pulling
clumps of clover from the flower beds: in fact
I'm looking for courage, for some evidence
my life will change, though
it takes forever, checking
each clump for the symbolic
leaf, and soon the summer is ending, already
the leaves turning, always the sick trees
going first, the dying turning
brilliant yellow, while a few dark birds perform
their curfew of music. You want to see my hands?
As empty now as at the first note.
Or was the point always
to continue without a sign?

 

榆木

整天我都在試圖區分
需要和欲望。現在，於黑暗中，
對我們，木材的營造和設計者，
我隻有感到苦澀悲傷，
因為我一直不變地
注視著這些榆木
和看到扭曲苦痛
的過程，靜止的樹
是痛苦的，並理解到
它不會做成形除了扭曲之狀。

Elms

All day I tried to distinguish
need from desire. Now, in the dark,
I feel only bitter sadness for us,
the builders, the planers of wood,
because I have been looking
steadily at these elms
and seen the process that creates
the writhing, stationary tree
is torment, and have understood
it will make no forms but twisted forms.

 

畫像

一個孩子畫著一幅人體輪廓。
她畫她所能畫的，但全是空白，
她不能在那填入她知道的東西。
在無支撐的線條內，她知道
生命正在消失；她切換
一個又一個背景。象個孩子
她轉向她的母親。

而你畫那顆心
用以抵付她創造的空虛。

Portrait

A child draws the outline of a body.
She draws what she can, but it is white all through,
she cannot fill in what she knows is there.
Within the unsupported line, she knows
that life is missing; she has cut
one background from another. Like a child,
she turns to her mother.

And you draw the heart
against the emptiness she has created.

 

奧德修斯的決定

那偉大的人返回到海島上。
現在他不會死於天堂
也不再聽到
橄欖林中天堂的琵琶，
在清澈池水邊蒼柏之下。時代

現在開始，他再次聽見
敘事大海的脈搏，
當黎明拉起後最為強健。
帶我們來這裏的
會帶我們離去；我們的船
在遭難的港口水中搖擺。

現在符咒終止了。
使他回到他的生活，
大海隻能向前洶湧澎湃。

(注：奧德修斯是荷馬史詩奧德賽中的英雄。)

Odysseus' Decision

The great man turns his back on the island.
Now he will not die in paradise
nor hear again
the lutes of paradise among the olive trees,
by the clear pools under the cypresses. Time

begins now, in which he hears again
that pulse which is the narrative
sea, ar dawn when its pull is stongest.
What has brought us here
will lead us away; our ship
sways in the tined harbor water.

Now the spell is ended.
Giove him back his life,
sea that can only move forward.

 

一個怪念頭

我要告訴你一些事：每天
人都在死。而那僅是開始，
每天，在殯儀館，出生新寡婦，
新孤兒。他們兩手合攏而坐，
試著去決定這新的生命。

然後他們在墓地，其中有人
是第一次。他們驚恐哭泣，
有時不哭。有人走過來
告訴他們下一步做什麽，可能
說幾句話，有時
將土投入敞開的墓穴裏。

而那以後，每個人都回到房裏，
裏麵突然滿是來訪者。
那寡婦坐在長沙發上，非常莊嚴，
人們排隊走近她，
有時握她的手，有時擁抱她。
她找些話對每個人說
感謝他們，感謝他們的到來。

在她內心，她卻想讓他們離去。
她想返回墓地，
返回醫院的病房裏。她知道
這是不可能的。但她唯一的希望，
是讓時光倒流。而隻是一點點，
不需遠溯至結婚和初吻之際。

A Fantasy

I'll tell you something: every day
people are dying. And that's just the beginning.
Every day, in funeral homes, new widows are born,
new orphans. They sit with their hands folded,
trying to decide about this new life.

Then they're in the cemetery, some of them
for the first time. They're frightened of crying,
sometimes of not crying. Someone leans over,
tells them what to do next, which might mean
saying a few words, sometimes
throwing dirt in the open grave.

And after that, everyone goes back to the house,
which is suddenly full of visitors.
The widow sits on the couch, very stately,
so people line up to approach her,
sometimes take her hand, sometimes embrace her.
She finds something to say to everbody,
thanks them, thanks them for coming.

In her heart, she wants them to go away.
She wants to be back in the cemetery,
back in the sickroom, the hospital. She knows
it isn't possible. But it's her only hope,
the wish to move backward. And just a little,
not so far as the marriage, the first kiss.

 

四月

沒人的絕望象我的一般—

在這花園中沒有你想那種事，
製造向外標誌的地方；顯然
那男人鏟除整個一片森林，
那女人拖拖遝遝，拒絕換衣服
或洗她的頭發。

難道你以為我在乎
如果你跟另一個人交談？
可我的意思是讓你知道
我期望兩個更好的生物
被賦予了頭腦；不然
你們實際上會互相關照
至少你們會理解
悲傷被分攤
在你倆之間，在你所有的仁慈裏麵，
對於我去認識你，就如深藍
標記著野海蔥，白色標記著
木紫羅蘭。

April

No one's despair is like my despair--

You have no place in this garden
thinking such things, producing
the tiresome outward signs; the man
pointedly weeding an entire forest,
the woman limping, refusing to change clothes
or wash her hair.

Do you suppose I care
if you speak to one another?
But I mean you to know
I expected better of two creatures
who were given minds: if not
that you would actually care for each other
at least that you would understand
grief is distributed
between you, among all your kind, for me
to know you, as deep blue
marks the wild scilla, white
the wood violet.

野鳶尾

在我的痛苦之端
有門一扇。
聽我說：你稱之為死亡
我記得。
頭頂，噪聲，鬆枝變幻。
然後皆無。微弱的太陽
閃爍在幹枯的地麵。
生存可怕
因知覺
被葬於地下黑暗。
後來結束：令你恐懼，存在
為靈魂而不
能言，突然終結，堅硬的大地
略彎。可我感覺是鳥兒
疾飛在低矮的灌木林間。
是你不記得了
遷移自另一個世界
我告訴你我能夠再說一遍：不論什麽
從忘卻回歸都返回
去尋找一個聲音：
來自我生命的中心
一個巨大的源泉，在蔚藍的
海水上幽影深藍。

The Wild Iris

At the end of my suffering
there was a door.
Hear me out: that which you call death
I remember.
Overhead, noises, branches of the pine shifting.
Then nothing. The weak sun
flickered over the dry surface.
It is terrible to survive
as consciousness
buried in the dark earth.
Then it was over: that which you fear, being
a soul and unable
to speak, ending abruptly, the stiff earth
bending a little. And what I took to be
birds darting in low shrubs.
You who do not remember
passage from the other world
I tell you I could speak again: whatever
returns from oblivion returns
to find a voice:
from the center of my life came
a great fountain, deep blue
shadows on azure sea water.

瑟西的威力

我從未把任何人變成豬。
有人是豬；我使他們
看來象豬。
我討厭你的世界
讓外表喬裝內在。你的人不壞；
懶散的生活
養成了他們的習性。作為豬
他們已變得溫和
由於我和我的
女士們的嗬護。
然後我逆轉符咒，向你展示我的
仁慈和威力。我看到
我們在此能夠快樂
作為男人和女人
他們的需求很簡單。同時
我預見了你的離去
你的人因我的幫助敢於迎戰
咆哮凶猛的大海。你想
幾滴眼淚就讓我傾覆？我的朋友，
每位女魔本質上都是
實用主義者；沒有人看本質而不
麵對局限。如果我隻想占有你
我能扣留你為囚徒。

(注：瑟西為荷馬史詩[奧德賽]中的女魔。)

Circe’s Power

I never turned anyone into a pig.
Some people are pigs; I make them
Look like pigs.
I'm sick of your world
That lets the outside disguise the inside. Your men weren't bad men;
Undisciplined life
Did that to them. As pigs,
Under the care of
Me and my ladies, they
Sweetened right up.
Then I reversed the spell, showing you my goodness
As well as my power. I saw
We could be happy here,
As men and women are
When their needs are simple. In the same breath,
I foresaw your departure,
Your men with my help braving
The crying and pounding sea. You think
A few tears upset me? My friend,
Every sorceress is
A pragmatist at heart; nobody sees essence who can't
Face limitation. If I wanted only to hold you
I could hold you prisoner.

瑟西的痛苦

我非常遺憾
愛你的這些年不管
你在與不在，遺憾
那法律，那神召
阻止我持有你，大海
一塊玻璃板，太陽漂白的
希臘船美神；如何
我能有魔力假如
我沒有意願
將你改變：雖然
你愛我的身體，
雖然那時你發現
我們所擁有的激情在
一切禮物之上，在那獨特瞬間
超越榮譽和希望，超越
忠誠，以那結合的名義
我拒絕你
因你妻子而有的這般情感
會讓你同她
度過餘年，我拒絕你
再次上床
如果我不能有你。

Circe's Torment

I regret bitterly
The years of loving you in both
Your presence and absence, regret
The law, the vocation
That forbid me to keep you, the sea
A sheet of glass, the sun-bleached
Beauty of the Greek ships: how
Could I have power if
I had no wish
To transform you: as
You loved my body,
As you found there
Passion we held above
All other gifts, in that single moment
Over honor and hope, over
Loyalty, in the name of that bond
I refuse you
Such feeling for your wife
As will let you
Rest with her, I refuse you
Sleep again
If I cannot have you.

坦白

說我沒有恐懼—
那不是真的。
我害怕患病，蒙羞。
象任何人一樣，我有我的夢想。
但我已經學會將它們藏起，
使自己不致於滿足：所有快樂
都引發命運之神生氣。
它們是姐妹，野人—
最終它們沒有情感
隻有妒忌。

Confession

To say I'm without fear--
It wouldn't be true.
I'm afraid of sickness, humiliation.
Like anyone, I have my dreams.
But I've learned to hide them,
To protect myself
From fulfillment: all happiness
Attracts the Fates' anger.
They are sisters, savages--
In the end they have
No emotion but envy.

馬

什麽馬能給你
我不能給你？
我注視你當你孤寂，
當你騎進奶牛場後的田地，
你的手掩藏在那匹母馬的
暗色鬃毛裏。
於是我知道你沉默背後的含義：
蔑視我，憎恨婚姻。然而，
你還是要我觸摸你；當新娘哭泣
你大喊大叫，可當我看你時我
沒見有孩子在你的身體裏。
那麽有什麽！
什麽也沒有，我想。隻是匆忙
搶在我死前去死。
在一場夢中，我注視你騎馬
越過幹涸的田地
然後下馬：你們倆一起走；
在黑暗裏，你們沒有影子。
但我感覺到它們正朝我而來
因為在夜裏它們到處去，
它們是主人主宰自己。
看著我。你以為我不明白？
什麽是動物
即使沒走過這無聊的一生？

Horse

What does the horse give you
That I cannot give you?
I watch you when you are alone,
When you ride into the field behind the dairy,
Your hands buried in the mare's
Dark mane.
Then I know what lies behind your silence:
Scorn, hatred of me, of marriage. Still,
You want me to touch you; you cry out
As brides cry, but when I look at you I see
There are no children in your body.
Then what is there?
Nothing, I think. Only haste
To die before I die.
In a dream, I watched you ride the horse
Over the dry fields and then
Dismount: you two walked together;
In the dark, you had no shadows.
But I felt them coming toward me
Since at night they go anywhere,
They are their own masters.
Look at me. You think I don't understand?
What is the animal
If not passage out of this life?

早期黑暗

你們如何能說
大地會給我喜悅？每樣生出的
東西都是我的負擔；我不能成功
是由於你們大家。

而你們會願意向我口述，
你們樂於告訴我
誰是你們當中最寶貴的，
誰長得最象我。
你們還舉出純生命
為例展示，超然—
你們為之奮鬥力爭

當你們不能理解自己
你們又怎麽能夠理解我？
你們的記憶不夠
強有力，它不會
返回至足夠久遠—
不要忘記你們是我的孩子。
你們遭難不是因為你們相互接觸
而是因為你們被出生，
因為你們要求了
有別於我的生命。

 

Early Darkness

How can you say
earth should give me joy? Each thing
born is my burden; I cannot succeed
with all of you.

And you would like to dictate to me,
you would like to tell me
who among you is most valuable,
who most resembles me.
And you hold up as an example
the pure life, the detachment
you struggle to acheive--

How can you understand me
when you cannot understand yourselves?
Your memory is not
powerful enough, it will not
reach back far enough--

Never forget you are my children.
You are not suffering because you touched each other
but because you were born,
because you required life
separate from me.

 

紅罌粟

偉大的是
沒有
頭腦。情感：
噢，我有那些，它們
統治我。我有
一個君主在天
叫作太陽，為他
開放，示給他
我自己心中的火，火焰
如同他的存現。
若不是一顆心怎能
這般榮耀？啊我的兄弟姐妹們，
你們曾經象我嗎，在很久之前，
在你們是人以前？你們
允許自己一度開放，不會再
開放？因為的確
我現在正以你們的
方式說話。我說
是因我花落葉殘。

 

The Red Poppy

The great thing
is not having
a mind. Feelings:
oh, I have those; they
govern me. I have
a lord in heaven
called the sun, and open
for him, showing him
the fire of my own heart, fire
like his presence.
What could such glory be
if not a heart? Oh my brothers and sisters,
were you like me once, long ago,
before you were human? Did you
permit yourselves
to open once, who would never
open again? Because in truth
I am speaking now
the way you do. I speak
because I am shattered.

 

 

七個時代

在我的第一個夢裏世界出現了
鹹的，苦的，禁止的，甜蜜的
在我的第二個夢裏我降格了
我曾是人，我不可能僅看一個東西
因我是野獸
我不得不觸摸，包容它
我藏在樹叢中
我在田野裏勞作直到田野光禿—
時間
絕不再來—
幹枯的麥束，小箱
無花果和橄欖
我甚至以我可憎惡的人的方式愛過幾次
並象每個人我把那成就稱作
性愛自由
即使愚蠢荒謬
麥子被聚集存放，最後的
果子被烘幹；時間
被貯藏，從未使用過，
難道它也終結了？
在我的第一個夢裏世界出現了
甜蜜的，禁止的
但卻沒有花園，隻有
原始要素
我曾是人
我不得不乞求降格
鹹的，苦的，要求的，先買權的
而象每一個人，我占取，我被占取
我夢到
我被出賣了
地球在一個夢中被給予了我
在一個夢中我擁有了它。

The Seven Ages

In my first dream the world appeared
the salt, the bitter, the forbidden, the sweet
In my second I descended
I was human, I couldn't just see a thing
beast that I am
I had to touch, to contain it
I hid in the groves,
I worked in the fields until the fields were bare --
time
that will never come again --
the dry wheat bound, caskets
of figs and olives
I even loved a few times in my disgusting human way
and like everyone I called that accomplishment
erotic freedom,
absurd as it seems
The wheat gathered and stored, the last
fruit dried: time
that is hoarded, that is never used,
does it also end?
In my first dream the world appeared
the sweet, the forbidden
but there was no garden, only
raw elements
I was human:
I had to beg to descend
the salt, the bitter, the demanding, the preemptive
And like everyone, I took, I was taken
I dreamed
I was betrayed:
Earth was given to me in a dream
In a dream I possessed it

 

瑟西的哀情

最終，我自己使
你妻子明白作為
一個神我會，在她自己的房中，在
艾薩斯，有聲音
沒有身體：她
暫停下她的編織，她的頭
轉向右，又轉向左
盡管肯定沒有希望
找出任何發聲的
物體：我懷疑
她將返回到她的織布機
帶著她目前所知。當
你再看見她時，告訴她
這就是一個神如何告別：
如果我永遠在她的腦海中
我就會永遠在你的生活中。

Circe's Grief

In the end, I made myself
Known to your wife as
A god would, in her own house, in
Ithaca, a voice
Without a body: she
Paused in her weaving, her head turning
First to the right, then left
Though it was hopeless of course
To trace that sound to any
Objective source: I doubt
She will return to her loom
With what she knows now. When
You see her again, tell her
This is how a god says goodbye:
If I am in her head forever
I am in your life forever.

 

願望

記得那次你許了願嗎？

我許好多願。

那次有關蝴蝶
我對你說了謊。我總想知道
你想要什麽。

你認為我想要什麽？

我不知道。想要我回來，
想要我們最終以某種方式在一起。

我想要我一直想要的。
我想要另一首詩。

The Wish

Remember that time you made the wish?

I make a lot of wishes.

The time I lied to you
about the butterfly. I always wondered
what you wished for.

What do you think I wished for?

I don't know. That I'd come back,
that we'd somehow be together in the end.

I wished for what I always wish for.
I wished for another poem.

 
(Louise Gluck)
新當選的美國國會圖書館桂冠詩人露易絲.格呂克1943年生於紐約，在哥倫比亞大學師從絲坦利.庫尼茨，後在威廉姆絲學院獲得了法律學位，畢業後曾在哥達德學院教書。出版有詩集《七個時代》（TheSevenAges2001），《新生》（VitaNova1999,獲得《波士頓圖書評論》主辦的“賓漢詩歌獎”），《草地》（Meadowlands1996），《野鳶尾》（TheWildIris1992,獲普利策詩歌獎和美國詩歌協會“W．C．威廉姆絲詩歌獎”），《阿拉若山》（Ararat1990,獲R．C．羅比特國家詩歌獎），《阿喀琉絲的勝利》（TheTriumphofAchilles1985,獲美國的全國書評獎）。格呂克還出版過一些評論及散文集。1999年當選為美國詩歌學會理事。2003年8月28日，美國國會圖書館在華盛頓宣布，普利策獎得主、著名女詩人露易絲.格呂克當選為新的美國國會圖書館桂冠詩人。

撤退的風

當我做成你們,我就愛著你們.
現在我憐憫你們.

我給了你們所需的一切:
大地之床,藍天毛毯—

隨著我進一步遠離你們
我就更加看清楚你們.
你們的心靈如今應很闊大
它們不該是
多嘴的小東西—

我給了你們每一樣禮物,
蔚藍的春之晨,
時間之多你們都不知該怎樣利用—
你們索要更多的禮物,那個為
另外的生物準備的禮物.

不論你們希望什麽,
你們將不會在花園中在成長的植物中,
找到你們自己.
你們的生活不象它們那樣是循環的:

你們的生活是鳥兒飛翔
在平靜中開始和結束—
開始和結束,以類似這
弧形從白樺樹
至蘋果樹.

Retreating Wind

When I made you, I loved you.
Now I pity you.

I gave you all you needed:
bed of earth, blanket of blue air--

As I get further away from you
I see you more clearly.
Your souls should have been immense by now,
not what they are,
small talking things--

I gave you every gift,
blue of the spring morning,
time you didn't know how to use--
you wanted more, the one gift
reserved for another creation.

Whatever you hoped,
you will not find yourselves in the garden,
among the growing plants.
Your lives are not circular like theirs:

your lives are the bird's flight
which begins and ends in stillness--
which begins and ends, in form echoing
this arc from the white birch
to the apple tree.

 

恐懼埋葬

在那空場地,在早晨,
那具屍體等待著認領.
幽靈坐其旁,在一塊小岩石上—
沒什麽再來給它身形.

想著那屍體的孤獨.
夜晚在修剪過的場地上踱步,
它的影子緊緊連接著四周.
如此一個漫長的旅途.

已見村莊那微顫的燈光
不為它停留依舊掃掠在路上.
它們看來還很遠,
那些木門,麵包和牛奶
象重物放在桌子上.

The Fear Of Burial

In the empty field, in the morning,
the body waits to be claimed.
The spirit sits beside it, on a small rock--
nothing comes to give it form again.

Think of the body's loneliness.
At night pacing the sheared field,
its shadow buckled tightly around.
Such a long journey.

And already the remote, trembling lights of the village
not pausing for it as they scan the rows.
How far away they seem,
the wooden doors, the bread and milk
laid like weights on the table.

 

晨歌

你想知道我如何打發我的時間?
我走在前麵的草坪,假裝
除草.你應該知道
我從不跪下除草,從不自
花床拉起幾簇三葉草;其實
我正在尋找勇氣,尋找我的生活
會改變的證據,盡管
需要花很久時間,檢查
每一簇以尋找象征性的
葉子,很快夏日將終,葉子
已經轉變,總是病樹
在先,這將死的化為
亮黃色,而幾隻暗色的鳥表演
樂聲唱晚.你想看我的手嗎?
現仍是空空的就象在第一個音符上.
或是那要點沒有
標記總是連續不斷.

 

Matins

You want to know how I spend my time?
I walk the front lawn, pretending
to be weeding. You ought to know
I'm never weeding, on my knees, pulling
clumps of clover from the flower beds: in fact
I'm looking for courage, for some evidence
my life will change, though
it takes forever, checking
each clump for the symbolic
leaf, and soon the summer is ending, already
the leaves turning, always the sick trees
going first, the dying turning
brilliant yellow, while a few dark birds perform
their curfew of music. You want to see my hands?
As empty now as at the first note.
Or was the point always
to continue without a sign?

 

榆木

整天我都在試圖區分
需要和欲望。現在，於黑暗中，
對我們，木材的營造和設計者，
我隻有感到苦澀悲傷，
因為我一直不變地
注視著這些榆木
和看到扭曲苦痛
的過程，靜止的樹
是痛苦的，並理解到
它不會做成形除了扭曲之狀。

Elms

All day I tried to distinguish
need from desire. Now, in the dark,
I feel only bitter sadness for us,
the builders, the planers of wood,
because I have been looking
steadily at these elms
and seen the process that creates
the writhing, stationary tree
is torment, and have understood
it will make no forms but twisted forms.

 

畫像

一個孩子畫著一幅人體輪廓。
她畫她所能畫的，但全是空白，
她不能在那填入她知道的東西。
在無支撐的線條內，她知道
生命正在消失；她切換
一個又一個背景。象個孩子
她轉向她的母親。

而你畫那顆心
用以抵付她創造的空虛。

Portrait

A child draws the outline of a body.
She draws what she can, but it is white all through,
she cannot fill in what she knows is there.
Within the unsupported line, she knows
that life is missing; she has cut
one background from another. Like a child,
she turns to her mother.

And you draw the heart
against the emptiness she has created.

 

奧德修斯的決定

那偉大的人返回到海島上。
現在他不會死於天堂
也不再聽到
橄欖林中天堂的琵琶，
在清澈池水邊蒼柏之下。時代

現在開始，他再次聽見
敘事大海的脈搏，
當黎明拉起後最為強健。
帶我們來這裏的
會帶我們離去；我們的船
在遭難的港口水中搖擺。

現在符咒終止了。
使他回到他的生活，
大海隻能向前洶湧澎湃。

(注：奧德修斯是荷馬史詩奧德賽中的英雄。)

Odysseus' Decision

The great man turns his back on the island.
Now he will not die in paradise
nor hear again
the lutes of paradise among the olive trees,
by the clear pools under the cypresses. Time

begins now, in which he hears again
that pulse which is the narrative
sea, ar dawn when its pull is stongest.
What has brought us here
will lead us away; our ship
sways in the tined harbor water.

Now the spell is ended.
Giove him back his life,
sea that can only move forward.

 

一個怪念頭

我要告訴你一些事：每天
人都在死。而那僅是開始，
每天，在殯儀館，出生新寡婦，
新孤兒。他們兩手合攏而坐，
試著去決定這新的生命。

然後他們在墓地，其中有人
是第一次。他們驚恐哭泣，
有時不哭。有人走過來
告訴他們下一步做什麽，可能
說幾句話，有時
將土投入敞開的墓穴裏。

而那以後，每個人都回到房裏，
裏麵突然滿是來訪者。
那寡婦坐在長沙發上，非常莊嚴，
人們排隊走近她，
有時握她的手，有時擁抱她。
她找些話對每個人說
感謝他們，感謝他們的到來。

在她內心，她卻想讓他們離去。
她想返回墓地，
返回醫院的病房裏。她知道
這是不可能的。但她唯一的希望，
是讓時光倒流。而隻是一點點，
不需遠溯至結婚和初吻之際。

A Fantasy

I'll tell you something: every day
people are dying. And that's just the beginning.
Every day, in funeral homes, new widows are born,
new orphans. They sit with their hands folded,
trying to decide about this new life.

Then they're in the cemetery, some of them
for the first time. They're frightened of crying,
sometimes of not crying. Someone leans over,
tells them what to do next, which might mean
saying a few words, sometimes
throwing dirt in the open grave.

And after that, everyone goes back to the house,
which is suddenly full of visitors.
The widow sits on the couch, very stately,
so people line up to approach her,
sometimes take her hand, sometimes embrace her.
She finds something to say to everbody,
thanks them, thanks them for coming.

In her heart, she wants them to go away.
She wants to be back in the cemetery,
back in the sickroom, the hospital. She knows
it isn't possible. But it's her only hope,
the wish to move backward. And just a little,
not so far as the marriage, the first kiss.

 

四月

沒人的絕望象我的一般—

在這花園中沒有你想那種事，
製造向外標誌的地方；顯然
那男人鏟除整個一片森林，
那女人拖拖遝遝，拒絕換衣服
或洗她的頭發。

難道你以為我在乎
如果你跟另一個人交談？
可我的意思是讓你知道
我期望兩個更好的生物
被賦予了頭腦；不然
你們實際上會互相關照
至少你們會理解
悲傷被分攤
在你倆之間，在你所有的仁慈裏麵，
對於我去認識你，就如深藍
標記著野海蔥，白色標記著
木紫羅蘭。

April

No one's despair is like my despair--

You have no place in this garden
thinking such things, producing
the tiresome outward signs; the man
pointedly weeding an entire forest,
the woman limping, refusing to change clothes
or wash her hair.

Do you suppose I care
if you speak to one another?
But I mean you to know
I expected better of two creatures
who were given minds: if not
that you would actually care for each other
at least that you would understand
grief is distributed
between you, among all your kind, for me
to know you, as deep blue
marks the wild scilla, white
the wood violet.

野鳶尾

在我的痛苦之端
有門一扇。
聽我說：你稱之為死亡
我記得。
頭頂，噪聲，鬆枝變幻。
然後皆無。微弱的太陽
閃爍在幹枯的地麵。
生存可怕
因知覺
被葬於地下黑暗。
後來結束：令你恐懼，存在
為靈魂而不
能言，突然終結，堅硬的大地
略彎。可我感覺是鳥兒
疾飛在低矮的灌木林間。
是你不記得了
遷移自另一個世界
我告訴你我能夠再說一遍：不論什麽
從忘卻回歸都返回
去尋找一個聲音：
來自我生命的中心
一個巨大的源泉，在蔚藍的
海水上幽影深藍。

The Wild Iris

At the end of my suffering
there was a door.
Hear me out: that which you call death
I remember.
Overhead, noises, branches of the pine shifting.
Then nothing. The weak sun
flickered over the dry surface.
It is terrible to survive
as consciousness
buried in the dark earth.
Then it was over: that which you fear, being
a soul and unable
to speak, ending abruptly, the stiff earth
bending a little. And what I took to be
birds darting in low shrubs.
You who do not remember
passage from the other world
I tell you I could speak again: whatever
returns from oblivion returns
to find a voice:
from the center of my life came
a great fountain, deep blue
shadows on azure sea water.

瑟西的威力

我從未把任何人變成豬。
有人是豬；我使他們
看來象豬。
我討厭你的世界
讓外表喬裝內在。你的人不壞；
懶散的生活
養成了他們的習性。作為豬
他們已變得溫和
由於我和我的
女士們的嗬護。
然後我逆轉符咒，向你展示我的
仁慈和威力。我看到
我們在此能夠快樂
作為男人和女人
他們的需求很簡單。同時
我預見了你的離去
你的人因我的幫助敢於迎戰
咆哮凶猛的大海。你想
幾滴眼淚就讓我傾覆？我的朋友，
每位女魔本質上都是
實用主義者；沒有人看本質而不
麵對局限。如果我隻想占有你
我能扣留你為囚徒。

(注：瑟西為荷馬史詩[奧德賽]中的女魔。)

Circe’s Power

I never turned anyone into a pig.
Some people are pigs; I make them
Look like pigs.
I'm sick of your world
That lets the outside disguise the inside. Your men weren't bad men;
Undisciplined life
Did that to them. As pigs,
Under the care of
Me and my ladies, they
Sweetened right up.
Then I reversed the spell, showing you my goodness
As well as my power. I saw
We could be happy here,
As men and women are
When their needs are simple. In the same breath,
I foresaw your departure,
Your men with my help braving
The crying and pounding sea. You think
A few tears upset me? My friend,
Every sorceress is
A pragmatist at heart; nobody sees essence who can't
Face limitation. If I wanted only to hold you
I could hold you prisoner.

瑟西的痛苦

我非常遺憾
愛你的這些年不管
你在與不在，遺憾
那法律，那神召
阻止我持有你，大海
一塊玻璃板，太陽漂白的
希臘船美神；如何
我能有魔力假如
我沒有意願
將你改變：雖然
你愛我的身體，
雖然那時你發現
我們所擁有的激情在
一切禮物之上，在那獨特瞬間
超越榮譽和希望，超越
忠誠，以那結合的名義
我拒絕你
因你妻子而有的這般情感
會讓你同她
度過餘年，我拒絕你
再次上床
如果我不能有你。

Circe's Torment

I regret bitterly
The years of loving you in both
Your presence and absence, regret
The law, the vocation
That forbid me to keep you, the sea
A sheet of glass, the sun-bleached
Beauty of the Greek ships: how
Could I have power if
I had no wish
To transform you: as
You loved my body,
As you found there
Passion we held above
All other gifts, in that single moment
Over honor and hope, over
Loyalty, in the name of that bond
I refuse you
Such feeling for your wife
As will let you
Rest with her, I refuse you
Sleep again
If I cannot have you.

坦白

說我沒有恐懼—
那不是真的。
我害怕患病，蒙羞。
象任何人一樣，我有我的夢想。
但我已經學會將它們藏起，
使自己不致於滿足：所有快樂
都引發命運之神生氣。
它們是姐妹，野人—
最終它們沒有情感
隻有妒忌。

Confession

To say I'm without fear--
It wouldn't be true.
I'm afraid of sickness, humiliation.
Like anyone, I have my dreams.
But I've learned to hide them,
To protect myself
From fulfillment: all happiness
Attracts the Fates' anger.
They are sisters, savages--
In the end they have
No emotion but envy.

馬

什麽馬能給你
我不能給你？
我注視你當你孤寂，
當你騎進奶牛場後的田地，
你的手掩藏在那匹母馬的
暗色鬃毛裏。
於是我知道你沉默背後的含義：
蔑視我，憎恨婚姻。然而，
你還是要我觸摸你；當新娘哭泣
你大喊大叫，可當我看你時我
沒見有孩子在你的身體裏。
那麽有什麽！
什麽也沒有，我想。隻是匆忙
搶在我死前去死。
在一場夢中，我注視你騎馬
越過幹涸的田地
然後下馬：你們倆一起走；
在黑暗裏，你們沒有影子。
但我感覺到它們正朝我而來
因為在夜裏它們到處去，
它們是主人主宰自己。
看著我。你以為我不明白？
什麽是動物
即使沒走過這無聊的一生？

Horse

What does the horse give you
That I cannot give you?
I watch you when you are alone,
When you ride into the field behind the dairy,
Your hands buried in the mare's
Dark mane.
Then I know what lies behind your silence:
Scorn, hatred of me, of marriage. Still,
You want me to touch you; you cry out
As brides cry, but when I look at you I see
There are no children in your body.
Then what is there?
Nothing, I think. Only haste
To die before I die.
In a dream, I watched you ride the horse
Over the dry fields and then
Dismount: you two walked together;
In the dark, you had no shadows.
But I felt them coming toward me
Since at night they go anywhere,
They are their own masters.
Look at me. You think I don't understand?
What is the animal
If not passage out of this life?

早期黑暗

你們如何能說
大地會給我喜悅？每樣生出的
東西都是我的負擔；我不能成功
是由於你們大家。

而你們會願意向我口述，
你們樂於告訴我
誰是你們當中最寶貴的，
誰長得最象我。
你們還舉出純生命
為例展示，超然—
你們為之奮鬥力爭

當你們不能理解自己
你們又怎麽能夠理解我？
你們的記憶不夠
強有力，它不會
返回至足夠久遠—
不要忘記你們是我的孩子。
你們遭難不是因為你們相互接觸
而是因為你們被出生，
因為你們要求了
有別於我的生命。

 

Early Darkness

How can you say
earth should give me joy? Each thing
born is my burden; I cannot succeed
with all of you.

And you would like to dictate to me,
you would like to tell me
who among you is most valuable,
who most resembles me.
And you hold up as an example
the pure life, the detachment
you struggle to acheive--

How can you understand me
when you cannot understand yourselves?
Your memory is not
powerful enough, it will not
reach back far enough--

Never forget you are my children.
You are not suffering because you touched each other
but because you were born,
because you required life
separate from me.

 

紅罌粟

偉大的是
沒有
頭腦。情感：
噢，我有那些，它們
統治我。我有
一個君主在天
叫作太陽，為他
開放，示給他
我自己心中的火，火焰
如同他的存現。
若不是一顆心怎能
這般榮耀？啊我的兄弟姐妹們，
你們曾經象我嗎，在很久之前，
在你們是人以前？你們
允許自己一度開放，不會再
開放？因為的確
我現在正以你們的
方式說話。我說
是因我花落葉殘。

 

The Red Poppy

The great thing
is not having
a mind. Feelings:
oh, I have those; they
govern me. I have
a lord in heaven
called the sun, and open
for him, showing him
the fire of my own heart, fire
like his presence.
What could such glory be
if not a heart? Oh my brothers and sisters,
were you like me once, long ago,
before you were human? Did you
permit yourselves
to open once, who would never
open again? Because in truth
I am speaking now
the way you do. I speak
because I am shattered.

 

 

七個時代

在我的第一個夢裏世界出現了
鹹的，苦的，禁止的，甜蜜的
在我的第二個夢裏我降格了
我曾是人，我不可能僅看一個東西
因我是野獸
我不得不觸摸，包容它
我藏在樹叢中
我在田野裏勞作直到田野光禿—
時間
絕不再來—
幹枯的麥束，小箱
無花果和橄欖
我甚至以我可憎惡的人的方式愛過幾次
並象每個人我把那成就稱作
性愛自由
即使愚蠢荒謬
麥子被聚集存放，最後的
果子被烘幹；時間
被貯藏，從未使用過，
難道它也終結了？
在我的第一個夢裏世界出現了
甜蜜的，禁止的
但卻沒有花園，隻有
原始要素
我曾是人
我不得不乞求降格
鹹的，苦的，要求的，先買權的
而象每一個人，我占取，我被占取
我夢到
我被出賣了
地球在一個夢中被給予了我
在一個夢中我擁有了它。

The Seven Ages

In my first dream the world appeared
the salt, the bitter, the forbidden, the sweet
In my second I descended
I was human, I couldn't just see a thing
beast that I am
I had to touch, to contain it
I hid in the groves,
I worked in the fields until the fields were bare --
time
that will never come again --
the dry wheat bound, caskets
of figs and olives
I even loved a few times in my disgusting human way
and like everyone I called that accomplishment
erotic freedom,
absurd as it seems
The wheat gathered and stored, the last
fruit dried: time
that is hoarded, that is never used,
does it also end?
In my first dream the world appeared
the sweet, the forbidden
but there was no garden, only
raw elements
I was human:
I had to beg to descend
the salt, the bitter, the demanding, the preemptive
And like everyone, I took, I was taken
I dreamed
I was betrayed:
Earth was given to me in a dream
In a dream I possessed it

 

瑟西的哀情

最終，我自己使
你妻子明白作為
一個神我會，在她自己的房中，在
艾薩斯，有聲音
沒有身體：她
暫停下她的編織，她的頭
轉向右，又轉向左
盡管肯定沒有希望
找出任何發聲的
物體：我懷疑
她將返回到她的織布機
帶著她目前所知。當
你再看見她時，告訴她
這就是一個神如何告別：
如果我永遠在她的腦海中
我就會永遠在你的生活中。

Circe's Grief

In the end, I made myself
Known to your wife as
A god would, in her own house, in
Ithaca, a voice
Without a body: she
Paused in her weaving, her head turning
First to the right, then left
Though it was hopeless of course
To trace that sound to any
Objective source: I doubt
She will return to her loom
With what she knows now. When
You see her again, tell her
This is how a god says goodbye:
If I am in her head forever
I am in your life forever.

 

願望

記得那次你許了願嗎？

我許好多願。

那次有關蝴蝶
我對你說了謊。我總想知道
你想要什麽。

你認為我想要什麽？

我不知道。想要我回來，
想要我們最終以某種方式在一起。

我想要我一直想要的。
我想要另一首詩。

The Wish

Remember that time you made the wish?

I make a lot of wishes.

The time I lied to you
about the butterfly. I always wondered
what you wished for.

What do you think I wished for?

I don't know. That I'd come back,
that we'd somehow be together in the end.

I wished for what I always wish for.
I wished for another poem.