文學城的朋友 bmdn 將我的原文翻譯成英文，英文功底非常好，能得到網友心心相印的友情支持，我深為感動。略作修改，加入博客收藏。
我深有同感，因此翻譯成英文，但願沒有曲解原意。是否貼出去，隨你的便。---- bmdn
Roar of an Enraged Mother
As the year full of busy and non-stop working days nearing its end, I was looking forward to a respite on the coming weekend, spending some time with my children, having a happy and relaxed holiday, and getting ready for the new year. Then there came the news of the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary in Connecticut. Suddenly, my heart was stabbed hard, at the most delicate and tenderest part of one’s life. Working hard like a bee at work and home, I have everything around me well organized. All of a sudden, I lost the drive and desire to complete my tasks. The harsh realization that we maybe helpless in preventing our children from being slaughtered like this tortures me and devours my soul. In the past three days, I have been restless day and night, I am not able to concentrate, my mind keeps wondering, and I feel like that I’ve lost my sense and become a zombie.
At night, children were in sound sleep, I was sitting in front of my computer. The aches and heaviness in my heart were indescribable. I logged on and by reading the postings in the Child Education Forum of WXC, I found some solace, as if I’ve found my lost comrades after a long march in the dark. I know that sharing with my fellow sisters of mothers’ hearts, I was not alone in bearing the unbearable in our lives. All those who believe that these kind of things cannot happen to them are fooling themselves. After the tragic kills at the Virginia Tech, I knew that things like that would happen again. Every day we pay a lot of attention to the health and safety of our children. But a mother’s instinct always reminded me that danger and evil maybe hidden in a corner nearby. What happened at Sandy Hook Elementary validated the inescapable nightmare that lingers in the hearts of many mothers. Today, we are confronted with the nightmare, which has become real. Sandy Hook touched our most sensitive nerves, because our children embody the spirit and essence of our true American Dream. The sound of the gun shots at Sandy Hook shattered and pulverized my American Dream. This is a genuine American domestic terrorism. I felt as if my soul already fled me.
Living in the South, I know full well that banning guns is a utopian impossibility. Yet I have never been able to comprehend why the weapons that can be used to cause a large scale massacre in a very short time are not prohibited. The Assault Weapons Ban enacted in 1994 during the Clinton administration expired in 2004 after 10 years. President Bush wanted to renew the act, but for unknown reasons Congress didn’t submit a new bill. President Obama did only lip service in his first term on this subject and he had no intention and did nothing. When I saw him wiping away tears during his speech on TV, anger flamed in my heart. Mr. President, your facile acting is scornful, your inability is disdainful, and your tears are disgustful, what have you done?! We need a leader like New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg, who doesn’t boast empty and highfalutin speeches, and who possesses the courage, capability, and experience as a leader. After the Colorado movie theater shooting, Bloomberg publically criticized the two Republican presidential candidates on their silence on guns. Just yesterday, Bloomberg made three proposals on reforming the gun laws. Since the massacre at Sandy Hook, Republicans have all kept silent, which is the best indication to the question of gun control. Their silence shows that the idea that they proclaim as Pro-Life is just a pure lie.
A nation that cannot protect the lives of her children, that permits a person with mental illness to kill at will, doesn’t deserve to maintain international peace! That a nation cannot even ensure the basic safety of its citizens, and yet still boast its democracy and liberty of its people, must be the fantasy of a fool!
Heaps of flowers, numerous teddy bears, prayers at churches, candle light vigils, faces in shock, bodies hugging each other, all these seem to have become a routine, which is played over and over again after each massacre. Soon after, all these disappear from the public’s eye sights. Nothing can reclaim the life of a child. The routines have become a way for survivors and others to sympathize, instead of commemorating the children. I fell numb and tired, knowing that this is a nation that is very adept at soothing itself. Two States have passed laws that legalize marijuana. Drugs can be used to relieve any pain and anything unbearable, and thereafter people feel normal again. Everyone continues to evade from reality and solutions for real problems.
I saw on TV a mother being interviewed, her six year old daughter was killed, the first thing she did when she got home was to rush to her daughter's bedroom and threw herself onto her daughter’s bed, because the scent of her daughter remains. I was crushed again, I couldn’t stop my tears.
And it was also yesterday, I seem to see some light at the end of a dark tunnel. I really hope that this time the light is real and not a hallucination. Joe Scarborough, the host of MSNBC’s Morning Joe, delivered a 10 minute commentary with a heavy heart. He said he is a conservative republican, Sandy Hook changed his thinking on gun rights. He was a four term state representative in Florida and has an NRA rating A. On ideology, he has always been for the rights of gun owners, but this time, he finally admitted that the tragedy at Sandy Hook changed his long held believes on guns. He said, “The entertainment industry doesn’t have the absolute right to glorify violence, poison the minds of the youth, our Bill of Rights shouldn’t give the gun manufactures the absolute right to sell to anyone military style high powered semiautomatic weapons” (from translation, not original quote). West Virginia Governer Joe Manchin is also an ardent supporter of gun rights, he also said that there must be a discusson on the Assault Weapons Ban. He also received the highest NRA rating A. It’s hard to change a culture, but the hardest part is actually to change people’s mind. When people change their minds, icebergs can melt.
We have to wait and see if Sandy Hook can become the tipping point or a watershed event on gun control in America. Needless to say, even if we come up with new and more stringent legislation, the lives of 20 innocent children have been sacrificed. Angels came down to the world, but they left us too early, with their wings clipped too early by the evils of this world. I hope the tragedy at Sandy Hook can wake up the conscience of the politicians and the gun owners. What kind of freedom, democracy, and rights do we really want?
This Christmas, I am in no joyful mood. Mourning with a heavy heart will be the theme of this holiday. My coworkers knocked on my door and sent me presents, yet I was not in the mood to receive it. I had to be honest with them. I am sorry. I can’t say Merry Christmas. This is a Christmas for mourning. I do not want to escape. I cannot escape from this country, the home we have been fighting for over twenty years. We cannot escape, so I would rather choose to be miserable. I would rather choose to demand answer and justice with anguish and outrage.
