如雲隨風
悠然 隨意 隨緣
有位閨蜜, 每年一月份都會總結一下過去, 展望一下未來. 每次新年見麵她的第一問都是:"你的new year resolution是什麽?" 而我每次都像是第一次被問一樣, 毫無思想準備的回答她"喲, 沒想啊." 然後在她的注視和等候下, 我隻得抓住腦子裏冒出的第一個念頭"那就be happy吧!" 於是年複一年, 每年的new year resolution都是be happy. 今年還沒等到她發問, 有關快樂的警句和文章就都向我鋪天蓋地而來, 冥冥中感謝上蒼沒有忘記提醒我------- 今年的new year resolution仍然是be happy.
警句
Laugh when you can....
Apologize when you should.....
and let go of what you can't change....
love deeply and forgive quickly....
Life is too short to be anything but happy...
you have to take the good with the bad...
love what you have...
and always remember...that life goes on...
是的, 不管發生了什麽, 明天的太陽仍然會照常升起.
轉貼文章Can money make you happy?
Can money make you happy? An entire quantitative field of study, happiness economics, has grown up around that question.
One of the best studies on the subject was done by economist Angus Deaton and psychologist Daniel Kahneman, winner of a Nobel Prize for Economics. The two, both professors at Princeton University, found that day-to-day happiness increases as income approaches $75,000 a year, but then levels off. The reasoning is that having more money helps us cope with life's problems, so we feel less sad and stressed. At the $75,000-a-year cutoff point, Deaton says, money is no longer as big an issue.
But Deaton and Kahneman distinguish between day-to-day happiness and life satisfaction. People at every income level who see a rise in income consider themselves more successful. So for every 10% rise in income, people gain the same amount of satisfaction, whether they're making $50,000 or $500,000.
The two researchers conclude: “High incomes don't bring you happiness, but they do bring you a life you think is better.”In his book Rush: Why You Need and Love the Rat Race (Hudson Street Press), Todd Buchholz makes a convincing case that striving and achievement, which often correlate with higher salaries, enhance happiness. Buchholz, a former Harvard economics instructor and former White House adviser, says, “The truth is, most people have a deep need to work and to create.”
Note that Buchholz doesn't say owning more stuff makes us happier. Cornell University psychology professor Thomas Gilovich agrees─ at least, he says, more stuff doesn't make us happier for long. Gilovich, the author of , How We Know What Isn't So (The Free Press), explains that possessions give us short-lived pleasure because we're amazingly adaptable. When faced with a bad situation, adaptability can be very helpful─we adjust to the situation and it no longer bothers us as much. But when it comes to material things, such as a big-screen TV, the pleasure we take in them drops quickly. People who seek more stuff end up on "a hedonistic treadmill" he says.
It's much better, says Gilovich, to spend money on doing things rather than buying things. Experiences, such as vacations and barbecues with friends, don't seem to be as easily devalued by our adaptive abilities. “You get a lot more social value out of your experiences,” he says. “When you talk to people about your experiences, it tends to be an enjoyable conversation. You talk about material goods much less."
And our experiences don't lend themselves to easy comparisons, which gives them unique value. Gilovich points out that with a car, for example, comparisons are too easy: “Your car costs less money? It gets better mileage and it's more reliable? Argh! You have a better car than I do!”
But, he says, "What if you went to Bali and I went to Hawaii? Well, Bali's more exotic, but I went to Hawaii with friends and I have my memories, and I'm not worried by that comparison.”
錢鍾書--- 論快樂
在舊書鋪裏買回來維尼Vigny的詩人日記Joural d’un pote，信手翻開，就看見有趣的一條。他說，在法語裏，喜樂bonheur一個名詞是“好”和“鍾點”兩字拚成，可見好事多磨，隻是個把鍾頭的玩意兒Si le bonheur n’tait qu’une bonne denie。我們聯想到我們本國話的說法，也同樣的意味深永，譬如快活或快樂的快字，就把人生一切樂事的飄瞥難留，極清楚地指示出來。所以我們又慨歎說：“歡娛嫌夜短！”因為人在高興的時候，活得太快，一到困苦無聊，愈覺得日腳像跛了似的，走得特別慢。德語的沉悶Langeweile一詞，據字麵上直譯，就是“長時間”的意思。西遊記裏小猴子對孫行者說:“天上一日，下界一年。”這種神話，確反映著人類的心理。天上比人間舒服歡樂，所以神仙活得快，人間一年在天上隻當一日過。從此類推，地獄裏比人間更痛苦，日子一定愈加難度；段成式酉陽雜俎就說：“鬼言三年，人間三日。”嫌人生短促的人，真是最快活的人；反過來說，真快活的人，不管活到多少歲死，隻能算是短命夭折。所以，做神仙也並不值得，在凡間已經三十年做了一世的人，在天上還是個初滿月的小孩。但是這種“天算”，也有占便宜的地方：譬如戴孚廣異記載崔參軍捉狐妖，“以桃枝決五下”，長孫無忌說罰得太輕，崔答：“五下是人間五百下，殊非小刑。”可見賣老祝壽等等，在上最為相宜，而刑罰呢，應該到天上去受。
永遠快樂-這句話，不但渺茫得不能實現，並且荒謬得不能成立。快過的決不會永久；我們說永遠快樂，正好像說四方的圓形，靜止的動作同樣地自相矛盾。在高興的時候，我們空對瞬息即逝的時間喊著說：“逗留一會兒罷！你太美了！”那有什麽用？你要永久，你該向痛苦裏去找。不講別的，隻要一個失眠的晚上，或者有約不來的下午，信仰更有效力，能使你嚐到什麽叫做“永生”的滋味。人生的刺，就在這裏，留戀著不肯快走的，偏是你所不留戀的東西。
快樂在人生裏，好比引誘小孩子吃藥的方糖，更像跑狗場裏引誘狗賽跑的電兔子。幾分鍾或者幾天的快樂賺我們活了一世，忍受著許多痛苦。我們希望它來，希望它留，希望它再來──這三句話概括了整個人類努力的曆史。在我們追求和等候的時候，生命又不知不覺地偷度過去。也許我們隻是時間消費的籌碼，活了一世不過是為那一世的歲月充當殉葬品，根本不會想到快樂。但是我們到死也不明白是上了當，我們還理想死後有個天堂，在那裏──謝上帝，也有這一天！我們終於享受到永遠的快樂。你看，快樂的引誘，不僅像電兔子和方糖，使我們忍受了人生，而且彷佛釣鉤上的魚餌，竟使我們甘心去死。這樣說來，人生雖痛苦，卻不悲觀，因為它終抱著快樂的希望；現在的賬，我們預支了將來去付。為了快活，我們甚至於願意慢死。
穆勒曾把“痛苦的蘇格拉底”和“快樂的豬”比較。假使豬真知道快活，那麽豬和蘇格拉底也相去無幾了。豬是否能快樂得像人，我們不知道；但是人會容易滿足得像豬，我們是常看見的。把快樂分肉體的和精神的兩種，這是最糊塗的分析。一切快樂的享受都屬於精神的，盡管快樂的原因是肉體上的物質刺激。小孩子初生了下來，吃飽了奶就乖乖地睡，並不知道什麽是快活，雖然它身體感覺舒服。緣故是小孩子時的精神和肉體還沒有分化，隻是混沌的星雲狀態。洗一個澡，看一朵花，吃一頓飯，假使你覺得快活，並非全因為澡洗得幹淨，花開得好，或者菜合你口味，主要因為你心上沒有掛礙，輕鬆的靈魂可以專注肉體的感覺，來欣賞，來審定。要是你精神不痛快，像將離別時的宴席，隨它怎樣烹調得好，吃來隻是土氣息，泥滋味。那時刻的靈魂，彷佛害病的眼怕見陽光，撕去皮的傷口怕接觸空氣，雖然空氣和陽光都是好東西。快樂時的你一定心無愧怍。假如你犯罪而真覺快樂，你那時候一定和有道德、有修養的人同樣心安理得。有最潔白的良心，跟全沒有良心或有最漆黑的良心，效果是相等的。
發現了快樂由精神來決定，人類文化又進一步。發現這個道理，和發現是非善惡取決於公理而不取決於暴力，一樣重要。公理發現以後，從此世界上沒有可被武力完全屈服的人。發現了精神是一切快樂的根據，從此痛苦失掉它們的可怕，肉體減少了專製。精神的煉金術能使肉體痛苦都變成快樂的資料。於是，燒了房子，有慶賀的人；一簞食，一瓢飲，有不改其樂的人；千災百毒，有談笑自若的人。所以我們前麵說，人生雖不快樂，而仍能樂觀。譬如從寫《先知書》的所羅門直到做《海風》詩的馬拉梅（Mallarm），都覺得文明人的痛苦，是身體困倦。但是偏有人能苦中作樂，從病痛裏濾出快活來，使健康的消失有種賠償。蘇東坡詩就說：“因病得閑殊不惡，安心是藥更無方。”王丹麓《今世說》也記毛稚黃善病，人以為憂，毛曰：“病味亦佳，第不堪為躁熱人道耳！”在著重體育的西洋，我們也可以找著同樣達觀的人。工愁善病的諾凡利斯（Novalis）在《碎金集》裏建立一種病的哲學，說病是“教人學會休息的女教師”。羅登巴煦（Rodenbach）的詩集《禁錮的生活》（Les Vies Encloses）裏有專詠病味的一卷，說病是“靈魂的洗滌（puration）”。身體結實、喜歡活動的人采用了這個觀點，就對病痛也感到另有風味。頑健粗壯的十八世紀德國詩人白洛柯斯（B.H.Brockes)第一次害病，覺得是一個“可驚異的大發現(Eine bewanderungsurdige Erfindung)”。對於這種人，人生還有什麽威脅？這種快樂，把忍受變為享受，是精神對於物質的大勝利。靈魂可以自主──同時也許是自欺。能一貫抱這種態度的人，當然是大哲學家，但是誰知道他不也是個大傻子？
是的，這有點矛盾。矛盾是智慧的代價。這是人生對於人生觀開的玩笑。
祝你新年快樂！