How Does One Stop An Obsession

欲罷不能

I realized about two years ago that I needed to spend more time on improving my verbal and written English instead of putting all my spare time solely on correcting the pronunciation problems, and I have been trying to do so in the past two years, only in vain.

Whenever I read something, I end up reading it aloud; When I check the meaning of a new or uncertain word, I notice that I am spending so much time, sometimes hours, in verifying its correct pronunciation and then mimicking the audio from the dictionary; And watching shows on TV/Youtube or listening to the radio usually become checking the pronunciation rules, online or from books offline.

I am willing to spend reasonable amount of time and efforts in English learning, but don't want to be obsessed, especially don't want to be stuck in perfecting pronunciation single mindedly. I have a lot of things to manage in life, and many of them are more important than studying the language.

So I decided I need to get rid of my obsession. And I turned to the online resources for help. When I googled "How can I stop ... ", I found the lyrics of this song, "How Do I Stop Loving You", sung by Engelbert Humperdinck. I was so struck by the similarity between my obsession to English Pronunciation and the feeling of the guy in the song to his losing lover. hmmm ...

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HOW DO I STOP LOVING YOU
WRITERS ARTIE BUTLER, NORMAN MARTIN
 
I'm trying so hard to forget you.
And leave the life we had behind.
And there are times I feel the day has come,
I've chased you from my mind.
But I'm afraid there's always something,
That sets me back and makes me see.
You're more than just a memory in the past,
You're still a part of me.
So how do I stop loving you?
Forget things that we used to do?
Forget all the dreams that we shared?
And how my life was knowing you cared?
Why do I end up where I start, each time I try?
Just tell me how I can forget,
So I can say goodbye...
I'm tired of all the lonely evenings,
And all the many times I've cried.
 
I'm tired of wondering what I might have done to keep you by my side.
And reaching out across your pillow,
I start remembering you're gone.
And though I know that we can never be,
The pain in me goes on.
So how do I stop loving you?
Forget things that we used to do?
Forget all the dreams that we shared,
And how my life was knowing you cared?
Why do I end up where I start, each time I try?
Just tell me how I can forget,
So I can say goodbye...
So how do I stop loving you?
Please tell me why...
I find it so hard to forget.
And hard to say... Goodbye.
Goodbye...