借著人家酒媽的話茬兒，咱也有可抖落的！

好吃狗一句戲言,酒媽就能一絲不苟地在放大鏡下把自己的五官鑒定了一番,可見不一般！

俺這臉譜最好任,沒一次讓人認錯過!

那年回國，自己認為自己挺酷，裏外穿的是黑的，外加一件拖到膝蓋的皮大衣，流著海軍路戰隊似的發型，眼見得大步流星入了關，連接俺的哥們兒都看到了，隻有幾步就跨出大門時，從後麵冒出倆武警，倒是真客氣：“先生，麻煩您跟我們走一趟！”折騰了半小時，翻了個底兒掉才被放出來，哥們兒見著俺的第一句話就是：“幹嗎呢？不知道現在嚴打呢嗎？肯定把你當販毒的了！”

後來決定來美國，H1B倒是很快就下來了，大老遠趕到哥本哈根取簽證，排了一大早的隊，到了俺，人家簽證官連眼皮都不帶抬的看了看材料，就說可以了，然後在電腦裏輸入些啥後，才愛搭不理地掃了俺一眼，眼神裏掠過一絲怪異的樣子，又掃了一眼電腦屏幕，然後用很低沉但堅定的語氣問俺：
“Did you ever have another names?”
"Not as I know"
"OK, Mr. Sun, I am sorry that I could not give you the Visa today."
"Why not?"
"Well, I found a person in our database who lives in Stockholm, which has the same lastname as yours, is a well-known Chinese mob in the region, we need the clearification from Washington."
"Just because we have the same last name?"
"Well, I could not tell you more about how we make the judgement. I am sorry, once we get the clearification from Washington, we will let you know."
俺招誰惹誰了？


後來結婚，本來租好了limos,但經人介紹認識了一個有收藏老式勞斯萊斯愛好的警察兄弟，俺一時衝動就央求人家借咱車秀秀，人家倒是爽快，當天親自出馬，開著一輛62年的勞斯萊斯來接俺打頭陣，婚禮是在金門公園，這位老兄就一直筆直地站在自己的車旁邊，盡心盡力，可駕不住往來的警察有認識人，就一並停下來和他搭訕，一會兒就站了好幾位，遊客本身就多，有好事者也停下來觀看，後來另一輛車的司機打小報告兒說有遊客看見一圈兒警察站在車隊旁邊，就議論說好像是一個黑社會老大的婚禮，警察是來巡視的！

節前去為聖誕節購物，Macy's裏一個售貨員對俺忒熱情，俺是受寵若驚，結完帳，她才怯怯地問俺：
“You are an actor, right?”
"How do you know?"
"I just saw a movie, I think that you are one of the actor in that movie."
"Really? Which one?"
"So you are an actor?!I knew it! God, what's the name of the movie now? anyway, you were the guy who played the Chinese Mob, right?"
"Sure, why not?!"