(mèm´e-rê) (圖)

Memory (mèm´e-rê)

 

What keeps morphing

in the half light of morning

is your shadow ( a body

made of water ( a river

flowing through me

like childhood

Octaves dancing

on my soft

limbs

. . .

Occasionally

pearls of tear drop

& roll onto my lips

where the past resurrected

and that’s all I have now

You

:

an eternal river

taking all my

sorrows

away

*

*

zz

 

 

[z.z.]

u r so humble...

:)

cheers!!

[z.f.]

zz,

老實說我的記憶力很糟糕，我轉頭就能忘記所看的書。。。但我所能記得的是感受和感覺。。。能給我感受和感覺的我想忘也忘不掉。。。因為電腦的儲存功能，我隻是翻到那一頁 ZT 過來罷了:)

所以其實我不是用的 "eyes" picking out the poems with similar themes...

I am de/coding "DNA"....“微明”中。。。（其實很糊塗:）

“I like the DNA de/coding is because this kind of scientific discovery reveals the complexity of human body --- not soul/spirit, of course --- but to know human body [a universe in its own rights] is to appreciate Life, i think....

Aren't you amazed by how our body works? How, for example, the skin can heal itself from a cut/wound??”

[作舟詩集]

zf,

you have keen eyes picking out the poems with similar themes....your mèm´e-rê is amazing.....i too thought of putting such poems together .... thanx!!!

wx000,

trust me, when i see something solid, i know it! such as your translation!

very glad you joined the club :)

sd: "...Lately I have been very busy, no time to carefully read everything. However, as you all know, my heart is with you as always. :) "

Your heart is as pure as water ....thanx :)


lz: "我的童年平靜而美好。生活苦點但全家相依為樂。父親的樣子也如詩所說。
除了這些，還有他一生的坎坷在沉默中泰然的神態。我很想念他。"

Words from the heart!!!!!

mermaid, thanx as always!!

[律周]

謝謝z.f. 作舟的這首詩我也很喜歡。
我的童年平靜而美好。生活苦點但全家相依為樂。
父親的樣子也如詩所說。
除了這些，還有他一生的坎坷在沉默中泰然的神態。
我很想念他。
以前寫過他思念故鄉漢陽的句子：好像是白發如藕，絲斷天山。

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　

[wx000]

“really solid Chinese foundation”？
說到中文水平，實在不敢當。在這裏我是真正的小學生小讀者。
感覺你們的文字很美，而且不僅僅停留於字麵上。謝謝各位大師！

[地中海人魚]

( a river / flowing through me / like childhood

Octaves dancing / on my soft / limbs

an eternal river / taking all my / sorrows / away

a thoughtful and penetrating work!!! beautiful and peaceful!

[z.f.]

sd, “…the heart, the intellect, or (more generally) the soul is susceptible…” :)

lz,你真是一個幸運兒，童年“柔軟晶瑩”:)

讓我想起作舟的另一首詩：

“In My Dream, Father Is Defined by the Taste of Hills“

...
In my dream, childhood is defined
By the taste of bitterness
The sad house with sad
Furniture and sad relatives
Rearranging their sad lives
The girl reads the message
On the bitter wind
What’s lost in the past life
Has found its way back
...

《夢, 父親和山》

夢中, 山的滋味
是父親的定義
他孤獨的身影
融入黯殤的土地
無言，靜止
而我的童年
如女孩竊竊私語
在暖色的雲絮下
悄然流逝

河流在女孩的眼裏
飄. . .

她看見一隻白色的巨鳥
鷹頭鳳翅
向沉默的父親
俯衝而來
想奪走他嘴中
殘留的語言

夢中，苦味
是童年的定義
悲傷的房裏
悲傷的家具
悲傷的親戚
在條理悲傷
的生活

女孩讀著悲風
帶來的音訊
時光流轉
生命輪回

夢中，記憶的滋味
是愛的定義
一團烈火
在巨大的白色
羽翼下誕生
我們不再
擔憂不測的傷害
不再恐懼
驚濤駭浪
會擊倒父親的身影
他平靜泰然
像座不知名的
岩石

[律周]

柔軟晶瑩的童年是
永恒的河唯一帶不走的

[by水滴]

Hi, everyone:

I wish that I had more time to read all your feedbacks and gave you some feedbacks. Lately I have been very busy, no time to carefully read everything. However, as you all know, my heart is with you as always. :)

[y.y.]

a classical version!

[wx000]

zz, i fell "you" in your poem must be somebody very very important in one's life, or simply the eternity. so use "您". a wild guess. thanks for sharing!

you are a real poet.

[z.f.]

哇, wx000, 太棒了!!!

你的翻譯有創化的意境，隻是“您"非“你”...感覺別樣...

...
晃若兒時
隨音曼舞
用我稚嫩的
羽翼
...

很美妙...

...
永恒之川
帶走我一切的
哀傷

最後一句很有氣勢...

真開心 wx000 來分享你的翻譯...

[z.z.]

wow,

wx000, really nice!!!!

you must have had really solid Chinese foundation!!!!

Can you tell me why you chose "您" instead of "你"??

thanx.....really enjoy it!!!

[wx000]

I like zz's this poem.

Adding some H2O,

記憶

晨光冥冥中
不住變幻的
是您的影子（水的
身軀）一條河
流淌過我
晃若兒時
隨音曼舞
用我稚嫩的
羽翼
。。。
時而
晶瑩的珠淚
滾落上我的雙唇
逝去的已複活
而我此刻全部的所有
是您
。
。
永恒之川
帶走我一切的
哀傷

*
*

[z.z.]

"瞎說八道":）???

No! No!

i think what you said is very poetic!!!

very impressed by your feeling toward those Chinese words....!!!

"...比如我一直想為“捕風捉影”平反，在藝術的感覺裏，“捕風捉影”的感覺是很美的。。。另外語言有很多限定，難以跳躍，跳躍的感覺也是很美的..."

yes! this is what poetry is about!!! it is the central function of language!! even though many people don't know "poetry" when they are living in it, speaking it.....

thanks zf for the wonderful feedback!!

[z.f.]

"our mind is actually "restrained" by what we know in our first language...."

是的，因為語言從某種程度上說屬“約定俗成”，而其實每個字有每個字很美秒的“原始”意思，真正的OPEN MIND，應該是詞語沒有褒貶（語言的褒貶來自時間的傷痕）。。。比如我一直想為“捕風捉影”平反，在藝術的感覺裏，“捕風捉影”的感覺是很美的。。。另外語言有很多限定，難以跳躍，跳躍的感覺也是很美的。。。

比如有兩句我從前翻譯成：

過去於唇上複生...
是我此時的所有

我的思維常很跳躍很符合我的感覺，但遵循語言習慣我改成了

於唇上複生的過去
是我此時的所有

這樣一來通順了，一語中底（老實說我不怎麽喜歡詩歌中一語中底的感覺）。。。於我而言，失去了“過去於唇上複生...”與“是我此時的所有”間隔的空間與情感在此間的流淌。。。恍如唇吻著過去。。記憶。。。唇欲吻。。。是我此時的所有。。。

而英文不是我們的第一語言，似乎帶來更多自由，更多的畫麵感，沒有束縛就是自由的感覺。。。人的情感是流淌的。。。人的思維是無限的，但是再無限如圓有圓心。。。知識也是，知識的質點閃光無限。。。所有追求真理的人走著不同的PATH，在同一處匯聚，擴散，匯聚，擴散，匯聚。。。像“fractals”的感覺。。。

You

:

an eternal river

taking all my

sorrows

away


很有意味，每個人都是一條永恒的河流。。。就像海洋河流積雪源頭流淌入海，河流的源頭當然不是高山上的積雪，積雪來自整個環境的轉化，與海洋與風與水與等等自然相連。。。sorrows從何而來？？來自始終的限製。。。

（"瞎說八道":）???

[y.y.]

fully agree, even though it takes a lot of effort to break it since it's deeply rooted in us, it's worth of It . . . . destroying then creating, or creating is destroying :)

[z.z.]

in that sense, the purpose of poetry/art is much easier to be understood....
that is, to break through, to destroy the "frame".....

at least, that's what i think....

cheers!

[y.y.]

yes, our mind is framed :)

a poem has its own music in it . . .follow its melody . . .

[z.z.]

yy,

it's better!!

zf,

it's interesting for you to mention the "圓,無限,很流淌..."

it might have something to do with our sense of language [since English is not our first language]....

in writing Chinese, we are writing the way we were taught, or the stuff we have read in Chinese [school books, i.e.]....so, our mind is actually "restrained" by what we know in our first language....

[z.f.]

隻因為題目“Memory”讓我想起“Locus”，因為“Locus”裏有問“What is memory?。。。”:)

I have had a good nap...thanks...

“i see that the line breaks in the poem provide different ways of phrasing in translation....really interesting!!!”

really interesting!!! 就像一首詩有很多麵一樣。。。很圓。。。很無限。。。很流淌。。。

我的中文很難把握英文那種流淌的感覺。。。

[y.y.]

i don't like that line either . . . :)

是你的影( 一 汪
水(從我身上

[z.z.]

zf,

thank you for bringing up "Locus"!!!! Forgot it already ... :)

really like the creative wording in your translation....maybe you have had a good nap?

:)

i see that the line breaks in the poem provide different ways of phrasing in translation....really interesting!!!

[z.f.]

記憶

在晨曦的微明裏
自如轉化的
是你的影（水做的
身體 (一條河
流淌過我
像孩提的
音樂舞在
我柔軟的
肢體
。。。
偶爾
淚珠滴落
滾動在
我的唇
於唇上複生的過去
是我此時的所有
你
：
一條永恒的河
帶走
我所有的
悲傷
*
*


讓我想起另一首詩 “LOCUS”, 比較一下:)

LOCUS

(language is the needle
(thought is the thread
(the cloth is experience ... (by nick piombino


When you dream
you erase the writings
on the blackboard
of my memory

What is memory?
Is it the blurred words
imprinted after the erasing?
Is it the place
where the needle meets
the cloth?

Lovers meet
in the intervals
of music where day and night
are blurred
seeing and thinking
are blurred

Do you see "birds"
in "forever?"
Do you see "a house by the river"
in "first kiss?"

When time grows old
memory grows backward
younger & younger
each day

Between two unfinished paintings
a ceaseless flow;
Between two undying minds
a complete river...




:3/26/05

[the rain outside
like your murmuring
washing the silk
of my wakefulness]

《心之所在》


筆是針
思是線
衣裳是經曆

-- by nick piombino



在夢裏
你擦去我書寫
在黑板上的記憶

什麽是記憶？
是那抹不去的
模糊的字跡？
還是針與布
相遇之地？

情侶
相逢在音樂的間隙
那裏
晝黑朦朧
所見與所思
業已恍惚

你是否在“永遠”中
見到“飛鳥”？
在“初吻”中
看見“水邊的愛巢”？

當時間老去
記憶卻逆向而行
一日比一日
年輕

兩幅未竟的畫稿之間
流水滔滔不息
兩個永恒的心靈之間
一條完美的河

[z.z.]

hi, yy, zf, how are you guys!

thankyou for the feedback!

nice rendition, yy!!!

"組成的身體(從我身上"... only this line is a lil rough....

but the whole translations flows....good word choices....

cheers!!

[z.f.]

beautiful!!!...yes...breath-taking and enlightening...

a love song flowing...

so happy to read a poem at napping noon...

yy's traslation is very beautiflul too... I will try my version later:)

thanks for sharing...

[y.y.]

回憶

在清晨的微光中
演變的
是你的影(水
組成的身體(從我身上
淌過的河流
如童年
在我柔軟的
肢體上
無聲地
舞
。。。

偶然
淚珠滴落
在我的唇上
滾動 - - -
過去重生
那就是我的
所有

你
：
一條永恒的河流
帶走我所有的
憂傷

*
*

[y.y.]

breath-taking!!!
love it!!!