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從迎來第一場雪的興奮到今年不尋常的過於頻繁落雪的埋怨 ，同事們因為知道我從加州搬來不久，常和我開玩笑怎麽沒把加州陽光帶來？
一場雪接一場雪，隔壁辦公室的同事給我寄來下麵的故事，我讀完哈哈大笑， 翻成中文如下：
搬去新澤西
八月十五號：
搬到新澤西。哇， 如此美麗！北望湖水，如此壯觀！等不及看到湖麵被白雪覆蓋的樣子，我會愛上這裏。
十月十四號
澤西毫無疑義是世界是最美的地方。樹上的樹葉開始變得紅橘相間。在公園裏漫步時看見幾隻優雅的鹿，它們真是這個地球上最奇妙的動物。這裏像個天堂，我愛死了這裏！
十一月十號
獵鹿的季節就要開始了。我難以想象竟然有人會射殺這種高貴的動物。我希望早點兒下雪。我熱愛這片土地。
那些紅紅黃黃的落葉已經像一塊雜色的地毯鋪在我家的後院。美麗極了！清理院子成了在清新涼爽的的空氣中鍛煉身體的機會。
十一月十五號
啊，更多的落葉，更多的運動和鍛煉。
十一月十八號
我的上帝啊！怎麽還有這麽多樹葉啊！還是等到他們全落完再清理吧。
十一月二十五號
終於等到這一天樹上所有的葉子都落了下來。今天終於清理完畢。
我的脊椎科醫生建議我明年最好請一位花園工。 我手上有四個水泡感染了，唉，也許應該記著戴手套。
十一月三十號
真TMD的見鬼了！這許多樹葉從哪裏來的？昨晚隻不過刮了點小風，今天草坪就被它們覆蓋了。哦，讓它們（樹葉）呆在那兒到明年春天吧。
十二月十三號
昨晚終於下雪了！當我醒來時發現整個世界披上一層白色的毯子。窗外的風景像一張明信片。我們出去鏟雪清理了走道和車道還打了雪仗。 鏟雪車過來了，大概我們還得把車道的盡頭的餘雪再鏟一次。
多美的地方啊！我愛澤西！
十二月十四號
昨晚又下雪了！我好開心哦！鏟雪車又把積雪弄到我們的車道上了。
但是，我還是很喜歡這裏。
十二月十八號
昨晚又下雪了！車道上都是雪，我出不去了，無法去上班。
我厭倦了鏟雪。去TMD的鏟雪車。
十二月二十二號
昨晚又TMD下雪了！好像又回到與落葉奮戰那樣，我的雙手如今到處都是鏟雪鏟出來的水泡。我總是忘了戴手套。我想那個見鬼的鏟雪車就躲在我家附近的某個角落，一等到我把車道的雪鏟完，他就出現了！真 TNND!
十二月二十五號
聖誕快樂！
更多該死的雪！如果那個開鏟雪車的人落在我的手裏，我發誓我一定宰了那個婊子養得他！
真搞不懂他們為什麽不多撒點鹽把那路上的鬼雪融化了。
十二月二十七號
昨晚又TMD下雪了！除了鏟車道上的雪幾乎足不出戶。手套鏟雪都鏟濕了，我的手長了凍瘡。醫生說還好不嚴重，很快就會好的。我們根本出不了家門，車子都陷在雪裏。天氣預報說今晚還要降大約十英寸的雪，你知道十英寸的雪要鏟多少雪鍬嗎？
十二月二十八號
那個鬼天氣預報根本不準！雪下了34英寸！照這樣下去，積雪大概要到夏天才能全部消融。鏟雪車被困在路當中了，那個龜兒子竟然問我借雪鍬。我告訴他我已經因為鏟雪損壞了六把雪鍬，誰知這最後一把也毀在他的手裏！
一月四號
今天終以可以走出家門了！去商店裏買了一些食物，卻在回家的路上，我的車被一頭鹿迎頭撞上。 三千美金的損失！這該死的鹿！真希望它們十一月份獵鹿的季節中全部被獵人殺光！
五月三號
把車開的修理行。車子被一個冬天路上撒的鬼鹽腐蝕得麵目全非千瘡百孔。
五月十號
搬去弗羅裏達的村落。我不能想象任何精神正常的人要住在這被老天都遺棄的新澤西！
讀完上麵的文字，我樂不可支，我的美國同事問我有沒有同感，我說對於秋天的美麗和落葉的折磨，還真是感同身受，今天的冬雪尤其得多，我倒沒有文章的作者反映那麽強烈，從不敢在雪地裏開車到無所畏懼，我也經曆了許多“驚險”的體驗！不過我問這位在新澤西住了一輩子的美國人，他怎麽看，為什麽還住在這裏？他說他生在此長在此，早已習慣！這裏是他的家！他問我有一天會不會像文章的作者搬到弗羅裏達去？我哈哈大笑回答：“要搬，我也不去弗州！那裏的颶風太多嚇人！我還是回我的加州去！”同事也哈哈一笑說：“加州整天地震，我也怕怕！”嘿嘿，真可謂蘿卜青菜，各有所愛吧！
Moved to New Jersey
August 15
- Moved to a new home in Jersey . It's so beautiful here.
The lake to the north looks so majestic.
I can hardly wait to see it snow covered.
I'm going to love it here.
October 14
I Jersey is definitely the most beautiful place on earth.
The leaves have turned all the colors and shades of red and orange.
Went for a ride through the park and saw some deer. They are so
graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful animals on earth.
This must be paradise, I LOVE IT HERE.
November 10
Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous animal,
hope it will snow soon. I love it here.
Those red and orange leaves have covered my yard. Looks like a magnificent
multi-colored carpet. HOW BEAUTIFUL. Raking and cleaning up the yard will
be an opportunity for invigorating exercise in the cool crisp air.
November 15 -
Ah, more leaves and more exercise.
November 18 -
Jesus, still more leaves. Guess it's best to wait until they've all fallen before I rake again.
November 25 -
Finally, all of the trees lost their leaves and today's final raking it's over for this season.
Chiropractor suggested I use a lawn maintenance service next year.
Only four blisters became infected. Should probably remember to use gloves.
November 30 -
What the f--k? Where did all of those leaves come from?
A little wind last night and the lawn is covered again.
Oh well, they'll just have to wait until spring.
December 12 -
It snowed last night, FINALLY. Woke up to find everything blanketed in white. It looks like a postcard.
We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. Had a snowball
fight (I won) and when the snowplow came by and we had to shovel the end of the driveway again.
What a beautiful place. I Love Jersey
December 14 -
More snow last night, I love it. The snowplow did his trick to the driveway again.
I Love it here.
December 19 -
More snow again last night. Can't get out of the driveway to get to work.
I'm exhausted from shoveling. F---ing snowplow.
December 22 -
More of that white sh-t fell again last night. As if dealing with the leaves weren't bad enough, now I've got blisters
all over my hands from shoveling, must remember to wear gloves. I think the snowplow hides around the corner
and waits until I'm finished shoveling the driveway. The a--hole.
December 25 -
Merry Christmas.
More frigging snow. If I ever get my hands on that son-of-a-bitch who drives the snowplow.
I swear I'll kill the bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt the f---ing ice.
December 27 -
More white sh-t last night. Have been inside for three days except for shoveling out the driveway
after that plow goes through every time.
F---ing gloves got wet and then froze on my hands. Doctor said it was just a mild case of frostbite, disfiguration
is probably only temporary. Can't go anywhere, car is stuck in a mountain of white sh-t. The weatherman says to
expect another 10 inches of the sh-t tonight. Do you know how many shovels full of snow 10 inches is?
December 28 -
The f---ing weatherman was wrong. We got 34 inches of that white sh-t. At this rate it won't melt 'till summer.
The plow got stuck up the road and the bastard came to the door and asked to borrow a shovel. After I told him
I'd already broken six of them shoveling all the sh-t he pushed into the driveway, I broke my last one on his f---ing head.
January 4 -
Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food and on the way back I hit a damned
deer that ran in front of my car.
Did about $3000 damage. F---ing beast should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed them all last November.
May 3 -
Took the car to the garage in town. The thing is rusting out from all the f---ing salt they put all over the roads.
May 10 -
Moved to The Villages in Florida .
I can't imagine why anyone in their right mind would ever live in that God-forsaken state of New Jersey
>我是自己通知老板說我今天在家上班
Me too, and they all knew I cannot drive on snow ...
這點上就看出還是月亮是好同誌！我是自己通知老板說我今天在家上班，同不同意我都賴在家裏了。可能因為大家都知道我新來乍到，都滿體諒我的。：）
還好我住公寓，落葉或積雪都會讓我更愛新澤西。窩心的是，每每雪天上班出門前一秒鍾查伊妹兒，總也盼不到老板發出的在家工作的消息。
英語中很多"F"字眼，我都翻成了"TMD","TNND",感覺不那麽太過...:) 我可以把原文放在中文的後麵，希望不會引起有些人的反感。
Could you please send me the English version? Thanks ...
Who cares about the earthquake! I can't imagine I get up 2 hours early to clear out the snow before I go out!