I run and run, almost just one step away to reach to the final line, suddenly I fell…. All of sudden, the world was stopped and kept quiet. No it was not kept quiet to be exact it was I who couldn’t hear it at one moment. I almost could feel the disappointment of my teacher; I heard the familiar yelling voices from all over the cheer noise when I jump out from the start position. But now… Why it was me fell, I should have been the number 2! Imagine a second grade little thin girl represent her class in the school 100 meters running competition but fell at the spot right before the final line. Even though everyone was assured her it was ok. But it definitely felt not so ok.
Now after many years past, I’m now standing on the magical career path again. Try to achieve something sincerely all by my own effort! It is almost too late, there is not much time left, I’m already at my middle age. I lost the precious 10 years trying to re-take off from my career after boarding at the Nordic land. Start all over from the first step at the ladder of success. The past stairs that gave me a steady and good life was left away, because I wanted to experience something unexpectable and exciting. I am searching and searching on the right direction. The stress life brought me some reconginization. But instead, I found myself more and more busy; I am living in a circle of the word “work!” I used to pay attention to fashions; I used to pay attention to the nutrition element of daily food. But now I don’t have time. I lost my weight, not because of exercising, I got stomach. I gained a few more wrinkle on the part of used to be very smooth skin, on my neck, at the corner of eye. I don’t have time to go Movie Theater, to go exhibition on Sunday! I don’t have time to enjoy a piece of beautiful music with my family. I’m lost, I’m sacrifice my life lots of joy to gain the vague success that is still not clear in front of me.
What is the point of being alive? Is it by a showing off woman with all these stress on the shoulder?
We don’t keep a hobby because we have to. In life we have choice. We can choose on which way you live. You may live a relaxed and enjoyable life without taken too much stress. You may live at a bright light with lots of attentions from other ones. But all your choice has a price to pay. To choose a relaxed life you lost the respect and power that you can control on other one lives. The other way would make you lost your true personality. You become coldness and lost the compassion. Instead to be honesty you learned to be cunning. But you have money and power!
So what is the point of being success?
When a life was just born, it is all so clean and pure and beautiful within the life. The skin of an infant is so soft and clean. Like the purest thing at all over the world. Along the growth, the one learned skills and become a useful force to contribute to the world. In order to get more success, the one learned to use tricks and to lie, to hurt and to fetch. It is an ugly world but a profitable life. Then the one is satisfied and waiting for the last day of the life.
Along the growth, we forgot to love, to be loved and to live.
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