Bravo! The newly found voice is vocal and graceful!

回答: The Power of WritingNewVoice2011-08-22 18:44:37

It's really risky to critisize other's writing, but I cannot resist the temptation to help polish this gem. Here are just a few humble thoughts:

1) ..., and it has a hidden power that can make a message more memorable and create an impact that is long-lasting. --> and it has a hidden power that can make a message more memorable, and an impact long-lasting.

2) It seemed that it was the end of the world --> It seemed to be the end of the world

3) As in Chinese, I felt more comfortable writing than speaking in English. --> As in Chinese, I felt more comfortable at writing than speaking in English.

所有跟帖: 

Excellent comments! Thank you! -NewVoice- 給 NewVoice 發送悄悄話 (159 bytes) () 08/24/2011 postreply 07:07:31

請您先登陸,再發跟帖!