great piece of writing! My suggestions...

I stopped envying what I do not have, but feel grateful with what I do have.--> I stopped envying what I do not have, but felt grateful with what I do have.?

 

Upon reading Carpediem’s essay on his marriage taking away his loneliness, --> Upon reading Carpediem’s essay on how his marriage taking away his loneliness?  

I thought I could write something down about --> I thought I could also write something down about?

what my marriage has brought me --> what my own merriage has brought to me?

I no longer mouthing along Annie Lennox’s --> I no longer mouth along Annie Lennox’s (however, not sure on the usage of "mouth along")

所有跟帖： 

• Thanks a lot! see my response. -非文學青年- ♀ (2289 bytes) () 08/07/2011 postreply 17:12:50

• The first one is changed to this: -非文學青年- ♀ (267 bytes) () 08/07/2011 postreply 17:22:03

• another one... -同學小薇- ♀ (287 bytes) () 08/07/2011 postreply 18:58:54

• Good catch! Thanks! -非文學青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 08/08/2011 postreply 00:39:37