to original author: windhome4- overcome "loser" mentality is the

many people have made lots of good post. hope all those are helpful to you.

- i want to point out a couple of things here, first, you have to get over the "loser" complex. if you feel you are loser, then you are. Jobs and good life are always there waiting for "winners" not "losers".

- you have to explore what made you feel like a "loser" and then work on that to get over that "loser mentality" and also "victim" mentality. some people always blame their "misfortune" for "other people" or "other circumstances". that may make them feel better because their "misfortune" or "unluckiness" is all caused by "others", such as pregnancy, parents, hu*****and and job market, college major, immigration status, language barriers etc.

-sometimes, we can not change the circumstances, but we can change our attitude. Once our attitude has changed, we would look at those "negative" circumstances differently and we will be able to either accept them or turn them to something more positive.

-Rather than focusing on the "bad"things-unexpected pregnancy, families obligation, wrong major etc, try to think of something "good" too- parents' support, a good family with kids and a hu*****and who is willing to support the family etc. Many people don't have that. they could be single mother, without anyone helping them. At least, you can afford not to work now, many people don't have that luxury, if they dont' work, they will have foreclosure, and they would not know where is the "next meal". compared to those, you are a thousand times better.

-unless really driven by money issue, otherwise, try to avoid hopping around those short term "labour" jobs you mentioned, which lasted from a few days, to a few weeks, to a few months. those will only make you feel more like a loser, because they don't fit you. you feel that you are "better" for those jobs, so they make you feel "bad". And many employers of those busiensses (restaurants, small retails) could be quite mean, they would pay you minimum wage (even lower than that) and work you like a dog. That would really make you feel miserable and make you feel like a "loser". you end up feeling like "i am really a loser, i can't even mob the table clean enough and fast enough". And those employers will be quick to point those out to you and put you down-that will break you down mentally. so avoid those. (don't get me wrong, those jobs could be good jobs and decent jobs for many, but they are appaerntly not suitble for you).

-once you get over the "loser" mentality, then consult a career counselor or some professonals, and have a plan for your career or whatever.

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• 回複：to original author: windhome4- overcome "loser" mentality is -windhome4- ♀ (624 bytes) () 07/07/2010 postreply 10:11:04