[ZT] George Carlin on Aging

I think I posted this classic piece by George Carlin here once. But it is so good it is worth a second helping, especially during the holidays when we tend to reflect on life's more important things. Without further ado, here it is:


Enjoy the ride: there is no return ticket
By George Carlin

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

'How old are you?' 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

'How old are you?' 'I'm gonna be 16!' You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the gr eatest day of your life ! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But! Wait!! ! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and make it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into ! Your 80's and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; 'I Was JUST 92.'

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. 'I'm 100 and a half!'
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them.'

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3.Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's family name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them , at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.


Life's journey is not to
Arrive at the grave safely
in a well preserved body,
But rather to skid in sideways,
totally worn out...and screaming

"Holy moly...what a ride!"

所有跟帖： 

• 好文！i always tell people i love them at every opportunity -撅著挺好- ♂ (46 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 16:31:10

• So do I, with slightly better results - -不撅也行- ♂ (192 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 18:19:21

• i love ya, haha -牧也- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 18:28:19

• i lv u, 2! c? i prctc wht i prch. -不撅也行- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 18:47:13

• thank you. one of my winkles just disappeared magically. -牧也- ♀ (43 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 19:00:30

• haha,看來撅家兄弟這方麵運氣都不是很好~~ -撅著挺好- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 23:45:08

• i love ya, haha -牧也- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 18:27:51

• if love can help, more to come, it's free,haha~~ -撅著挺好- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 23:39:22

• 聖誕拜讀莊董帖,明天開始不裝懂. very nice! we luv U!Thanks! -美國老土- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/25/2009 postreply 23:35:14