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流淚的蝴蝶 (zt)

(2006-10-18 21:00:55) 下一個

 戀愛三年了,林和紫準備在秋天結婚.紫在新房裏架了一台縫紉機.要把從布料中心淘來的一塊粉色的緞子做成窗簾.快做好的時候,紫的手指突然被針尖紮破了,不由失聲叫了出來,林心痛地用窗簾包住她受傷的手指。放開手,那塊窗簾染上了一塊粉紅色的血跡.紫聽老人說過,辦正經事的時候,見血是不好的預兆,她的心便有了細細毛毛的折痕.端詳了那塊血跡很久,用針在上麵繡了一隻粉紅色的蝴蝶.   
    窗簾終於做好了,林站在椅子上準備將它掛上去,卻突然摔下來,昏倒在地上。林患的是癌症,醫生要紫做好心理準備,說可能性最在的是林就此昏睡不醒,變成植物人.那以後,紫每天除了照顧林,就是祈禱,希望仁慈的上帝救救她生命中不可缺少的愛人.一天紫在夢想中仿佛聽到有人說:如果你願意變成一種動物三年,你的愛人就可以醒過來.好,我願意,隻要你能救他。請把我變成一隻蝴蝶吧.紫感覺自己的身體變得輕盈,然後兩隻手臂變成了一對翅膀,輕輕一扇,就飛上了天空.這真是一個美麗的夢。忽然紫聽到護士夕的聲音:他醒了,他醒了。他醒了,紫想問她是不是林醒了?卻發現已經不能發出聲音了,再一看自己在半空中......原來她真的變成一隻蝴蝶。  

    紫放低翅膀,停在林病房的玻璃窗上,看到林坐起身,四處尋覓,喊出的第一個字是:紫。紫的心裏一下快樂起來,她拚命地扇動翅膀想引起林的注意,她想他一定會認出她來......隻是可惜,沒有人會注意到一隻蝴蝶振動翅膀的頻率,包括林.原來,世上最遠的距離,不是天各一方,不是生離死別,而是我就在你麵前,你卻無法認出我。  
    林傻傻地坐在床上發呆,護士夕勸他出去走走,但林象聽不見一樣,沒有任何回應。一愁莫展夕發現了紫,指著她對林說:你看多漂亮的蝴蝶啊,我們出去看蝴蝶吧.蝴蝶想到了那個在窗簾上繡蝴蝶的女子,林一下從床上跳下來說:我要去看蝴蝶.接下來的每一天,夕都會陪林到病房外的花園走走,有時候在椅子上坐下來,林對夕講他和紫三年來一起走過的點點滴滴。說到動情處,林會忍不住聲音哽咽地問夕:紫到底去了哪裏?這時,紫都會飛落到他的肩上。  


    林的身體一天天好起來,而紫卻不能在陪伴林了,因為秋天來了,她必須飛到另一個溫暖的城市去,不然她會凍死的.在他們本來要結婚的時候。   
  第二年夏天,紫迫不及待地飛到這個城市。正好聽到林和夕的談話,卻不再是有關自己的內容,而是一些逗笑的輕鬆話題。紫看到林不時偏過頭看夕,那眼神裏有令紫心悸的炙熱。紫感覺一陣眩暈,輕輕地落在林的肩膀。她多想能象從前那樣依在他的胸前,聽他的心跳。突然,林伸出手臂攬住夕的肩膀。紫的心中一陣銳痛。盡管那隻是顆小小的蝴蝶的心髒。夕一偏頭,看到落在林肩膀上的紫,輕輕地驚歎:多美的蝴蝶啊。林轉過頭,一下捏住了紫的翅膀,將紫拿到夕的麵前說:喜歡嗎?我把它做成標本送給你。紫心頭一涼,但她不想掙脫,哪怕是死在愛人的手下,為的是取悅另一個女子,她也不想逃走,因為是無論做一個女子,還是做一隻蝴蝶,也無論生死,她的一切都會為這個男人而存在。不,快放了它吧。如果把它做成標本,它的愛人找不到它會傷心死的。夕說,你真是一個善良的女子。林看著夕的眼睛。紫看到那雙眼裏折射出的光芒,刺痛了她,以至於在被林鬆開雙翅後忘記了飛翔,一下子跌在草地上。夕:哎呀了一聲,從地上撿起紫,把她捧在手心裏,對林說:看,你把它弄痛了。林說:它隻是一隻蝴蝶,怎麽會痛呢?看啊,蝴蝶哭了。夕看到紫眼裏有很小卻晶瑩的水滴在閃爍。而林已無心看這隻蝴蝶,他側過身輕輕地吻夕的臉龐,紫翅膀一振,飛離了這個城市。淚水竟然落了一地。  

    第三年的夏天,紫都不想在到林的城市裏去了。但她還是忍不住去了。她飛到曾經和林準備結婚的新房,第一眼就看到自己繡了蝴蝶的窗簾,心尖滑過一絲疼痛。門開了,紫看著夕挺著大肚子走進來,林在後麵嗬護著她.紫靜靜落在窗簾上那塊血漬繡的蝴蝶上,看著林將夕扶坐在沙發上。“看,多神奇的蝴蝶!”夕發現了紫,指給林看,“它正巧落在那隻繡的蝴蝶上。”林走到窗前,紫閉上眼睛,等待林用手來捉自己。最愛的人啊,我願意承受一切,隻要是你賜予的。好久,都沒有動靜。紫睜開眼睛,她幾乎窒息,林蹲在她的身邊,凝視著她。他的呼吸撲麵而來,那麽久違,那麽熟悉,那麽輕而易舉地讓一隻蝴蝶流淚了。   

  “我看到了,蝴蝶真的會流淚。”林的眼裏全是迷離,伸手去撫摸紫的身體。紫輕輕地扇動翅膀,轉過身將臉在林的指尖上輕輕地磨蹭。“我覺得,它像一個人。”不知何時走到林身邊的夕輕輕說:“像一個人?”林震了一下,回過頭看夕。夕的眼眶濕了,咬著下唇點點頭。林轉過頭看紫,正在這時,紫揚起翅膀飛出了窗子。   
    三年終於過去了。神準備將這隻可憐的蝴蝶變回自己,紫阻止了神,說:“我不想變回人去打擾他的幸福了。” 
   
    這年秋天,夕為林生了一個女兒,取名“蝴蝶”,但他們再也沒有看見過那隻會流淚的粉紅色蝴蝶。
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愛,是奉獻,是犧牲,是為他想,是給他自由。
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Crying Butterfly

Lin and Zi had been in love for more than three years. They prepared to get married in Fall. Zi setup a sewing machine in the bedroom and managed to make a curtain using a block of pink cloth. Unfortunately, Zi's finger was stuck by the needle when the curtain was almost done. Hearing Zi’s screaming, Lin quickly wrapped her finger  with the curtain, which left a pink blood stain. There was a saying that seeing blood before wedding was a bad sign, would lead bad luck. So Zi could not drive away the thought that something bad would happen. She looked at the blood stain for a while and embroider a pink butterfly on it.

The curtain was finished. Lin stood on a chair and tried to hang it on. All of a sudden, Lin fell off on the floor and lost his consciousness. Lin was sent to hospital. The doctors told Zi that Lin might sleep forever and might not gain his consciousness back anymore because he had a fatal and incurable disease. Apparently, Lin would be in vegetative state forever. From then on, Zi prayed for Lin everyday except taking care of him in the hospital. She Hoped that God would save Lin, her lover, who was the most important and precious one in the world.

One day, she seemed to hear that somebody said to her in her dream:” If you'd like to change yourself to an animal for three years, your lover Lin would wake up." "Great, I 'd love to do it as long as you could save him. Please turn me to a butterfly." Zi felt her body was getting lighter and her arms changed to wings. She flied into the sky. This was a wonderful dream. Suddenly, Zi heard one of the nurses was shouting happily:” He is awake. He is awake." Zi wanted to ask if Lin woke up. But she could not speak anymore. She looked at herself flying in the sky. She realized that she was really a butterfly now.
 
Zi retracted her wings and stopped on the window. She saw Lin sat up and tried to look for her everywhere. The first word Lin spoke out was Zi. Zi was excited. She shook her wings eagerly and tried to get Lin's attention. She believed Lin would recognize her. Unfortunately, Lin did not notice the butterfly. The farthest distance in the world was neither we were on the other side, nor we were separated by death,but you could not recognize me even I was right in front of you.    

Lin was sitting on the bed absent-minded. The nurse Xi persuaded him to walk for a while. But Lin seemed to hear nothing and did not respond. Xi was frustrated. She saw Zi, the butterfly, and said to Lin:"How pretty the butterfly is! Let's go and enjoy the butterflies outside." Lin jumped off the bed excitedly and said:” I want to see the butterflies." On the following days, Xi walked with Lin in the garden. Sometimes they sat down on the bench and Lin would tell Xi about the life, which he shared with Zi. Sometimes Lin could not stop asking sadly:” Where is Zi on earth?" Whenever it happened, Zi, the butterfly, would stop on his shoulder. 

Lin was getting better. But Zi could not be with him because the Fall was coming, when they were supposed to get married. She had to leave for a warm city, otherwise she would die from cold.

Zi could not wait to fly back to this city in the following Summer. When she saw Lin, he was telling Xi some jokes. Zi knew Lin would not talk about her anymore. Zi noticed that Lin looked at Xi from time to time. Zi could read the desire and care in his eyes. Zi felt dizzy and stopped on Lin's shoulder. How eager she was to lean on his chest, listen to his heartbeat like before. Suddenly, Lin held Xi's shoulders. Zi felt sharp pain in her heart, although that was only a little butterfly's heart. Xi turned her head and saw the butterfly on Lin's shoulder. Xi admired:” How beautiful the butterfly is!"Lin turned his head and held the butterfly's wings promptly. He gave the butterfly to Xi and said:” Do you love it? I will make it a specimen." Zi was depressed but she didn't try to fight. She gave up to flee away even she would probably be killed by her beloved man, even he would fawn over another woman. She told herself:" no matter I would be a girl or a butterfly, no matter I would be alive or dead, I would sacrifice for this man and all what I do would be for him." "No, please let her go. If you made it a specimen, her lover would be dead without her." Xi said to Lin. "You are so kind hearted." Lin looked deep into Xi's eyes. Zi saw the love flashes in his eyes, which hurt her deeply, and she even forgot to fly away and fell off to the grass after he set her free.  Xi screamed and held Zi in her hands carefully from the grass and said to Lin:"See, you hurt her." Lin replied:” She is only a butterfly. How can she feel any pain?" ""Look, the butterfly is crying." Xi saw a tiny clear teardrop in Zi's eyes. However, Lin was unwilling to see the butterfly. He turned around and kissed Xi's cheeks gently. The butterfly shook her wings vigorously and left this city. Her tears dropped on the grass.

In the third year, Zi could not stop coming back to Lin's city again. She flew to the new house, in which Lin and she prepared to get married. The first thing entered into her eyes was the curtain, on which was embroidered a pink butterfly. She felt painful in heart. The door was open. Coming pregnant Xi. Lin was trying to protect her behind. Zi quietly stopped onto the blood-stained embroidered butterfly. Lin helped Xi to sit on the loveseat. "Look, how miraculous the butterfly is!" Xi found Zi and showed to Lin. "She is just standing on the embroidered butterfly." Lin walked to the window. Zi closed her eyes "My love, I love to bear anything as long as it is what you give me." She waited for a while but nothing happened. Zi opened her eyes and could hardly breathe. Lin was squatting beside her and staring at her. Zi could feel his breath. How familiar it was! It could easily make a butterfly cry.
"Yes, I see, the butterfly is really crying." Lin touched Zi's body gently. Zi shook her wings slightly and rubbed Lin's finger with her face. "I feel she is like somebody." Xi said gently. "She is like somebody?" Lin shocked and looked at Xi. Xi nodded with tears in her eyes. Lin turned around and looked at Zi while Zi unfolded her wings and flew out of the window.

Three years passed. God wanted to change the pity butterfly back to herself. Zi stopped God:” I don't want to be a human being anymore. I want them live happily after."

Xi gave birth to a baby girl named "Butterfly" in Fall. Since then, they never saw the crying pink butterfly anymore.


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