如果世界我做主-by小朋友紫鴨梨

紫鴨梨小朋友是瑞寶寶的女兒，今年不足9歲。她有個自己的博客，沒事就愛滔滔不絕的寫。沒有文學細胞的孩子爹看了紫鴨梨文采飛揚想象力充沛的文章，就和公雞看見雞蛋裏孵出一隻大象來一樣震驚, 同時也非常自豪，的確是他的女兒並且和他一樣聰明。我也覺得小女孩兒真不錯，真是一代勝過一代。

轉一些她的小文章，很有意思，大家周末愉快！

If I were in charge of the world

If I were in charge of the world,
I'd cancel vegetables,
Busy weekends,
All sickness,
And also my sister when she is crying.

If I were in charge of the world,
Gymnastics would be easier,
Mamma Lucia would be cheaper,
And also sleepovers would happen more often.

If I were in charge of the world,
You wouldn't be sad,
You wouldn't have 1970's fashions,
And also you wouldn't have bedtimes,
Or "I want water, Purple Pear" (My little sister's daily request)
You would not even have to drink milk.

8/7/2009

A.P.P. Vegetable

I invented A.P.P. Vegetable. It was named after my name, Awesome Purple Pear. I invented it on Sunday October 26th, 2008. I invented it because it will make you stay healthy and you will always get an A+ or B+ if you eat it. I invented at my house. A.P.P. Vegetable needs carrots, salad, ranch, and boiling hot water. First, you would pour the boiling hot water in the pot. Next, you would dip ten carrots in the ranch. Third, you need to put the carrots in the pot. Fourth, you dump two ounces of salad in the pot. Last, you turn on the heat, and you wait for ten minutes. Your A.P.P. vegetable is now ready. You can start eating. One pound of A.P.P. vegetable costs a dollar. If you want to try, come to 111222333 Hunter Woods St., Richmond, VA. You can also buy one pound there.

1$=1lb.

Oct. 2008

A letter from the president purple pear

Dear American Citizens,

As 50th president of the United States I will have a team, special field trips, and math programs.

I would like my mom to be the first female vice president. My mom is good at math, so she can help the country with the money. I would like her to help collect taxes. I think we should spend money on sports' programs. I would like a gym in the white house. There will be mats, uneven bars, and a cheese mat. There will also be an outdoor gym with slides, hangliders, and swings. My younger sister, C will be in charge of the outdoor gym. My dad will help my mom. My grandma will be the White House cook. She will cook lots of Chinese food.

As president of the United States of America, I would have many field trips for kids. The first field trip would be going to the Big Apple Circus. The circus has horses, ponies and dogs. The Big Apple Circus has jugglers, clowns, and acrobats. The next field trip would be going to the highest mountains in Virgina. The highest mountains are called Shenandoah. As president I want some kids to take a field trip to the moon. They will put on big white suits.

There will also be a lot of math programs. I want kids to learn mulitplication. Kids should learn fractions, so when they grow up they can measure things. They should learn about time, so they can read time when they grow up. And use it wisely. The kids should learn about money, so when they grow up they know what a dime, nickel, penny, and quarter is. When they buy stuff they give the right amount.

I bet kids that love to learn will grow up and get into a good college and get a good job.

Your President

Awesome Purple Pear

 

 

 

 

[明亮]

aptamer，嗬嗬，我也喜歡頭一首詩。

紅月，嗬嗬，很可愛，還是第二代移民更幸福燦爛一些。

陳默，嗬嗬，大家就想找個茬打鬧一番呢。你玩得好不好？

歌兒，歡迎你來錦上添花，你可以站到大胸大痣那列隊伍裏，那邊人少，你去吧沒事。

[aptamer]

哈哈

最愛那首詩。真有文采!

[藍山紅月]

哈哈，這紫鴨梨小姑娘實在太可愛了。。。

[陳默]

哈哈，這裏太熱鬧了！

紫鴨梨這小姑娘實在是太有才了！太可愛了。~~~

歌兒在國內腐敗得很吧？抓住問個好！

[歌兒]

嗬嗬，我來趕個熱鬧的尾巴，順便錦上添花一下，我就是那’大痣無胸‘類的。百花齊放啦！:)

[明亮]

哈哈哈哈，真是熱鬧啊，怎麽就從紫鴨梨拐到胸啊，痣啊，還要扔進去洗澡，聽上去根本就是我在熬雞湯的一些步驟，我肉老不行了，賣不出好價錢，小豐滿，小餅子嫩，真的，我見過照片。
三豐子你總結得很精辟，鼓掌。還有我晚上熬雞湯了，farm market買的土雞，真香啊，要說做飯還得靠原料，是美人穿什麽衣服都好看，清雞湯不穿衣服也誘人啊。
行了，明兒都好好玩吧，夏天眼看尾巴越來越短了。愉快愉快。

[阿小餅]

回複三豐子的評論:我知道，看得最明白的還是您。讚！：）

[三豐子]

阿餅是胸無大痣，小豐滿是胸大無痣。

值得欣慰的是，總算沒人，胸無痣大，大痣無胸，大象無形

[畫大餅]

回複三豐子的評論:我剛才出去了。這會子才看見您的貼。
向毛先生保證，小豐滿那是特異功能，那啥，您要不給開個課題研究一下。：）

[mycereal]

小豐滿：你見了那個啥，也許會犯錯誤的，嗬嗬。

[南山鬆]

紫鴨梨真棒.

這因紫鴨梨引起的糾紛也太熱鬧了,我一邊笑去了.

[三豐子]

小心著涼啊，底下兩位千金。。。

[畫大餅]

回複小豐滿的評論:他奶奶的，不得了啊

好事兒全讓你占了。。。。

你扒拉明大亮，我扒拉你，然後如此泡製。。。其他的我就不說了。。。反正是大把大把的錢擋不住的來我家啦。。。。

[小豐滿]

憤怒報複版：

如果世界由我說了算
我要明亮的一切財物
和她本人
財物留下
人扒光
扔浴缸裏 洗叭洗叭
再撈出來 擦叭擦叭
拿點脂粉 抹叭抹叭
賣到山裏 換點錢花
裸照留下 城門上掛

叫你欠我版權費！！

[明亮]

麥片，好，讓你女兒也寫幾句，一定也不錯的。

[明亮]

小豐滿，我經過僧推月下門的推敲，改成了：如果世界我做主。我覺得這樣更體現主人翁的氣魄，有誰主沉浮的意思，哈哈，你更搶不到版權費了。

畫大餅，你不如叫畫元寶。:)))

[mycereal]

紫鴨梨太牛了，文采熠熠啊！

我帶著女兒一起看的，她倒是認認真真地仔細地讀了，嗬嗬。

樓下的畫大餅好！

[畫大餅]

豐滿豐滿小豐滿，這個名兒挺好！謝謝啦：）

[阿小餅]

回複小豐滿的評論:
真是奇了，丫頭，怎麽隔著個屏幕，都能看穿我，俺真的是：胸無大痣啊。
趕緊找帥哥看去，看穿他們，一定要看穿他們。。。然後寫報告：）

[明亮]

哈哈，小豐滿，我也得用蘭花指指著你說“呸，還版權費”，要不是我辛苦把紫鴨梨的鴨梨體抄襲過來，你長這麽大想過這個“世界我說了算”這個命題沒有？你回去檢討去吧。

[小豐滿]

to明亮:

估計這世界一時半會兒不會由我說了算，所以我那些零也沒啥想頭了。那啥，那版權費啥的，你能考慮一下嗎？既然都說我貪得無厭了，那我就破罐破摔了。

to小餅：

叫我怎麽說呢，這個白日夢吧，資源是無限的。我有了，你也可以有，反正大家都真沒有。不是我說你，胸無大誌，快把名兒改成畫大餅，那多氣派。

[明亮]

對，小豐滿，你這個翻譯好，如果世界由我說了算。準確，霸氣。我把標題照你這個改改。

[明亮]

哈哈，小餅子，你可太太太那啥了，為這些後麵的掛的零姐妹們可別傷了和氣，這個說實話你們把銀行賬戶告訴我，我閉著眼就給你們把0像加汽油一樣加滿了。告你們沒多大用，還是家裏存一水缸鑽石管用的。

[明亮]

小豐滿，哈哈，打倒你這個貪得無厭的財迷。我就沒你那麽貪心，加上5個零就足夠了。再要一群像鴨梨這樣好玩的孩子圍著我轉。世界就太美好了。

小幸兒，紫鴨梨看起來邏輯也不錯，一，二，三，四的數得很清楚啊。

花朵，哈哈，美女S對她媽媽說她家孩子屬於基因突變。我周末陪個遠道來的朋友，就在DC城裏轉悠了。


小餅子，嗬嗬，是啊，我小時候不愛吃也得吃，哪裏想得到要寫個鴨梨體反抗一下啊。你好好培養你家小餅子，我看他眼珠賊亮，腦子也特好使，遺傳你。

小泥山，嗬嗬，APP得樂壞了，這麽多阿姨過來誇她。不過最樂的估計還是她爹媽。

美好時光，S說了人家是基因突變，瑞寶寶說是祖上的慧根，我覺得咱可以帶著紫鴨梨到陌生地方找路，一定就看得出來她遺傳誰了。

5憂，可不是，這後浪勁頭真大。我很喜歡下一代更強，有希望啊。

大家周末愉快！

[阿小餅]

回複小豐滿的評論:
我蘭花指頭翹
尖尖的食指
指向了
你
“呸！丫頭你想得美！
等我加滿了八個
才輪的到你
呢（長音，注意這個一定要長音，老長老長的啦）”

[小豐滿]

哇，不愧叫紫鴨梨，寫的博客都跟梨花體詩似的。還苯哲理，讚。

我也東施效顰(不笑娼)一個：

如果世界由我說了算
我隻要
零
八個零
加到我名下資產數值
的後麵
其他的一切
都
照舊
因為
有了那些零
這個世界已經
足夠美好

[我是幸運兒]

哈哈哈哈,向APP總統致敬; 寫得真是太好了,和明小亮阿姨的文一樣的條理清晰,惹人開心 :))

"First, Next, Third, Fourth, Last..." 叫我寫就是 and then, and then, and then...了

[花朵]

Purple Pear sounds awesome! Cheers!

還不到９歲？這麽小就這麽有才！唉。。。我們老了。。。：）

既然當爸爸的那麽震驚，估計紫鴨梨的文才隨媽媽，哈哈：）

明亮周末愉快！這個周末你又要去哪兒腐敗啊？：）

[花朵]

回複5憂的評論:

向５憂致敬！分珍珠啦：）

[阿小餅]

瓦賽，真的是不得了，未來的作家
看來小朋友們都不喜歡吃蔬菜，喜歡睡在其他小朋友家，哈哈
那個發明很厲害阿
雞窩裏的大象啊：）

[小泥山]

haha, front row!

"公雞看見雞蛋裏孵出一隻大象來" - LOL !!!

A.P.P. is amazing :)

[美好時光]

紫鴨梨寫的真不錯啊，太好玩了，這是遺傳了爹還是遺傳了媽？哈哈哈。

[5憂]

真是長江後浪推前浪，一浪把父母拍在了沙灘上！

[5憂]

花朵兒，搶到珍珠！