I never celebrate Chinese festivals and never adress it to anyone, inluding my mother. I've totally zoned out of it.
I feel too old to be someone else's child because I have my own children to raise, three of them. It's ridiculous to miss your mother when you're 40, 50, or even 60 years old and busy with your own lives. For some people it's never a proper time to grow up and stop being a child. Life is too busy and goes too fast for us to be nalstalgic. Soon we'll be gone too. Who will miss us then? Probably no one.
Another thing is that I am more preoccupied with my sons and daughter than with my mother's well beings. If there's any thing that could strike a string in my heart, it's my five year old son, not my mother whom I haven't seen for years. I worry about my son because he's very young and needs care, because he just entered kindergarten. My mother, however, is living a very healthy, stable life and feels confident to live till 100+. I don't need to put thoughts on her everyday. We do chat once for a while but not very often because I really don't have time or the mood to conduct a conversation with her. I have to count the time after work, when to take kids to Taekwondo, when to remind them to do homework, when to tune up the violin for practice sessions and when to open Zoom meeting for the math and ELA lessons online. And I do have a day job, 8 hours a day, five days a week. There's so much to do that on weekdays I can't get a rest until 10pm, and I have to get up at 6:30 am the next day to get ready to go to work. That's why for an adult like me, his/her own mother fades into the backdrop of life's hustling and buzzlings. Sorry, but not everyday is Christmas day.
