I think you are a very smart and well educated lady. You can be

In US, you have to think in American way, you still using Chinese thinking in handling everything, that why you got into trouble.

You should be self-support, try to be independ. Even if you can win the 家暴 case, the cost is too high, not worth it.

You sounded like you know legal system in the US, actually, you are not.  Legal system in the US are very complicated, that why small citizens obey the law, trying to stay out of trouble.