首先父母要冷靜.我的情況比你更糟.而且是糟糕透了.

長話短說. 小兒子四年的時候(去年). 在學校碰到事情, 摔東西, 踢東西. 跟人吵的時候說要殺人,強奸人(I want to kill you, rape you);跟人打架,在學校課桌上刻F>>K.

你知道在美國意味著什麽. 學校讓他停一個星期課. 強製我們帶他去看精神病院. CITY裏專門的兒童心理機構...總之弄得焦頭爛額.

 

此時做父母的一定要冷靜. 不能軟了方寸. 在中國小孩子這種表現其實算不了什麽,可在美國不一樣.

 

事實上我們自己也知道小孩子無非就是頑皮一點(我自己讀小學,初中何嚐不是如此). 做父母的此時既不能緊張, 又不能放縱. 應該心平氣和跟小孩子講這樣做引起的麻紡.商量的口氣跟他好好說. 不要罵他.傷害小孩子的天性.孩子的日子來日方長,不要傷了他的自信,天性.另外跟小學溝通,讓他們知道你是通情達理的, 也在努力.讓他們覺得父母是有學識教養的. 做父母的一定不要讓小孩子覺得他是不正常的. 其實男孩子這樣挺正常.不正常的是現在矯枉過正的美國學校. 入鄉隨俗, 我們又不得不按他們的方式做事情.

孩子半年就不一樣. 不要用成年人的思維要求小孩. 要耐心.他現在招惹的麻煩逐漸少了.無論如何,父母不要傷害小孩子的自尊心和自信.

兒子讀五年級的時候老師要父母描述一下自己對小孩的看法要對老師的要求. 我這裏付我寫的給你看看.這世界上話都是人說的, 有時候替兒子說說好話多少有點效果.

 

XXX is, in a word, mischievous.

Which sounds like a particularly negative thing until you consider its implications for his education and interactions; first, that it makes him enormously creative and curious. He's always getting into things to find how they work and finding inventive ways to amuse himself. For example, we've caught him more than once trying to figure out the innermost workings of our downstairs toilet (but only after Mom got suspicious that the house had gone too quiet for too long-- and began wondering why there were so many flushing noises coming from the bathroom). Truly, a real-life Denice the Menace.


Secondly, XXX is always and unabashedly blunt and honest; never the one to nitpick or fuss over the little things, he gets over daily squabbles with his brother and the sundry inconveniences of being the youngest child quickly and without holding grudges. And he is most always cheerful and willing to help-- and despite sometimes managing to learn his way into trouble, he unerringly means well and is just generally a sweet, excitable boy.

My hope for XXX this year is that he grows in what he knows but doesn't lose his childish air or imagination; I'd love to see that his dreams remain boundary-less, but at the same time, his age and the world mandates that he become more aware of the world.

But truly, to this end, I have few concerns-- and complete faith that my son is a good-hearted child and that he is in good hands this year.

 

 

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• 你有你的point，保護自己孩子的自尊自信，也沒有錯。可是，想想別的孩子 -??qiguai??- ♀ (485 bytes) () 12/27/2010 postreply 22:57:17