This puzzled the groom, since after 12 marriages, he thought that at least one of her hu*****ands would have been able to perform. He asked his new bride to explain the phenomenon. She responded:
My first hu*****and was a Sales Representative who spent the entire marriage telling me, in grandiose terms, how great it was going to be.
My second hu*****and was from Software Services; he was never quite sure how it was supposed to function, but he promised he would send me documentation.
My third hu*****and was from Field Services and repeatedly said that everything was diagnostically OK, but couldn't get the system up.
My fourth hu*****and was from Educational Services, and you know the old saying-'Those who CAN, DO; those who can't, teach.'
My fifth hu*****and was from the Telemarketing Department. He knew he had the order, but he wasn't quite sure when he was going to be able to deliver.
My sixth hu*****and was an Engineer. He told me that he understood the basic process but needed three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
My seventh hu*****and was from Finance and Administration. He knew how, but he just wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
My eighth hu*****and was from Standards and Regulations, and he told me that he met the minimum standards but regulations weren't clear on how to do it.
My ninth hu*****and was a Marketing Manager. Even though he had the product. he just wasn't sure how to position it.
My tenth hu*****and was a psychiatrist. All he ever wanted to do was talk about it.
My eleventh hu*****and was a gynecologist, and all he ever wanted to do was look at it.
My twelfth hu*****and was a stamp collector, and all he ever wanted to do was . . .-God I miss him!
So now I've married you, and I'm really excited."
"Why is that," asked the lawyer.
"Well, it should be obvious! You're a lawyer!! I just know I'm going to get screwed this time!