我給小兒洗腦—我是誰

不久前，女兒kinder garden 的 student star week 輪到我家小女了。老師要求做一個POSTER， 掛在教室門口。另外鼓勵該生家長到孩子班上讀一次書。Poster好辦，有的是照片。我和女兒選了幾個主題的照片貼上，題為：Angelina's wonderful life, 後來貼不下，又做了一張 Angelina's interesting activity.主題１：Silk Worm life Cycle. 有女兒養蠶，從caterpillar , cocoon 到　moth 的過程，桑樹桑葉等。主題２：孵雞養雞。主題３：愛好。畫畫，手工，爬樹，彈琴拉琴等。主題４：旅遊。海裏淺灘遊泳，海邊堆沙，壯觀的 Niagara Falls　, Capital Hill 等。貼完後，讓小女解釋了每一張照片在做什麽，因為她要 給全班同學show她的poster 的。 家長讀書的事怎麽辦呢？我這業餘英格理事要班門弄斧了嗎？忽然想起一個笑話，說是找乒乓冠軍下棋，找象棋冠軍打乒乓。Yeah. 於是想了幾個象形字：大，小，口，網，田，木，林，森。每個字底下注上英文意思，用一張紙能裝下的最大號字打印了２０份。女兒似乎覺得字不夠大，呼呼的把每張紙隻寫一個碩大的字。　我說Angelina，你不是在浪費紙嘛，媽媽已經都打印好了。女兒也不理會，寫好就把她的一摞紙塞到書包裏了。跟老師約好時間，懷裏揣著這幾個漢字和小女喜歡的一本英漢對照的書［神農鞭藥］就英勇赴約去了。我其實心裏沒底，從沒教過小學生，又非常希望在女兒的同學麵前顯擺最光輝的形象。 我 是這樣開場的：Hey people, we all live in America, speak English. Do you know there are people live in other country who speak totally different language? the language could be so different just like the birds talk to each other and we don't know what they talk about, and the birds don't understand our talk. The language could be so different that if two people talk about killing you in front of you, you wouldn't know. 有點過哈：-）。接著我說了句中文，問孩子聽懂了沒有。雖不懂，看得出孩子們都很新奇。I am from China, so I am Chinese. 我接著說。I see in your class, some people have white skin, some darker. Some have blue eyes, some are brown. Some have blonde hair, and Angelina has black hair. Everybody looks different. Could anybody tell me that what we have in common? 大眼瞪小眼，孩子不知說什麽好。終於有一個卻生生的聲音從一個小女孩那兒發 出：person. YES, 我很誇張的大聲喊道。You are so smart. We are all human being. Do you know what is the difference between monkey and human being? See their face look quite like us. Do you know if a monkey daddy marry with human mommy, they can have kids or not? 有幾個孩子猶豫了一下肯定的說 Yes. Noooo, 我說。But why can't human have kids with monkey? There is a secret code called chromosome in our body, human has 23 pairs chromosome, and monkey has 24 pairs. Kids take one set of each pair from daddy and mommy. 23 from human does not match with 24 from monkey, so we can't have kids. But, as human being, no matter how different we look, we have same number set of Chromosome, THAT, keep us human pure. " Oh Wow, I learned something new". 老師發言了。 Before I read this book, 我揮了揮手中的書，I would like to introduce you several Chinese letters. 女兒一聽要教字了，忽地從老師安排的前排中央竄到我跟前，把２０份打印好的漢字發給每一個人，包括老師。手 上拿著她自己寫的每頁一個的大字。Look, this letter means big. 女兒張開雙臂做出大的樣子，同時顯示她寫的那個大字。　至此，我終於明白了女兒為什麽要浪費我的紙。This letter means little, 女兒搭下雙臂，表現出很小，time out 的神情。This letter means mouth. 沒等我解釋，小朋友們一個個張大了嘴。Isn't this letter look like a net? I asked. Yeah, 老師非常認同。This last three letters are related. 木，wood. more wood put together make it woods. many wood put together make the letter forest. Do you think Chinese letters look cool? they look and sound totally different right? 看得出孩子們非常參與和有興趣． Can I take the paper home? 剛認完字幾個孩子等不及的問道。Yes please, bring it home and show your daddy and mommy how Chinese letters look like. 隻見個個孩子都把中國字收了起來。小小孩是很貪的，哈哈。接著，我坐到了孩子們的同側，把我的寶貝女兒摟在懷裏，week star　似乎是有這個特權的。我把書舉的高高的，所以後麵的孩子也能看到書上的畫。神農鞭藥這本書編得挺好的，故事情節性比較強，比如頭上長角的孩子，采藥被猛獸圍攻，老虎身上的道道就是神農們在與野獸搏鬥中用鞭子抽的，以及神農幾次起死回生等。讀書的過程中常被孩子要求用中文讀，呼聲高的時候，我就用中文讀一段。孩子雖然聽不懂，卻感到很新鮮。當老師了解到五千年的本草綱目的草藥仍在現代中國應用時，非常驚訝。　老師問怎麽認中文呢？有音標嗎？我說，不象英文，你會說，基本就能認識；中國字隻能一個一個的學，記住每一個字。Oh Wow, 老師可能覺得那個比較難。最後，我提議把書留給他們，贏得師生一片歡呼。隻有我女兒著急了。媽媽這是我還要讀的書。沒事乖乖，我再給你買本新的。哪會隻買一本呢， 當然是三本。接著忽悠到三年級沒問題，反正老師學生每年重新洗牌。懶媽，哈哈。 接 著是孩子們自由活動時間。隻聽幾個孩子跑到女兒麵前說：Angelina, can I play with you? Angelina I want to play with you. 小女馬上成了true star. 看來附炎趨勢是人類的天性嗬。 我最近還經常思考這種天性在進化過程中的意義呢。