seaborn的博客
飲馬橋
體驗無家可歸者
Developing Empathy, Sleeping like a homeless person
大兒子今年13歲小學畢業，考入了本地一所大公校的IB預備班。從上中學的第一天起就忙的不亦樂乎， 每天做不完的作業，還天天必需寫博客。
萬聖節之夜他 Party 歸來，洗淨臉上油彩後宣布，從當晚開始體驗無家可歸者的生活。這是學校給他們這個班的project。第一晚要求整夜不蓋被子，不開暖氣，開窗睡覺，不能洗漱。第二天和第三天隻能吃Food Bank(加拿大為無家可歸者提供食物救濟的慈善機構)的食物，於是他兩天中吃的都是最便宜的罐頭食品。 這兩天隻能睡在屋裏的地上，可以墊硬紙板，不能蓋被子。這期間他還繼續作為主力前鋒參加了一場正規足球比賽，一比一戰平。
第四天和第五天，要求最苛刻，他們隻能吃乞討來的食物(beg for food), 並且晚上要在戶外不蓋被子，不用睡袋，隻能墊紙板睡覺。孩子白天要上學, 乞討食物隻能在學校裏進行。他一大早就去了學校,下午回家時高興的告訴我他中午要到了足夠的食物,多餘的夠他當晚飯吃的了。晚飯都有些什麽呢？幾塊糖，一小包爆米花，和一小罐酸奶。這些真是不夠他這個大個子男孩吃的，他趁天黑前出去挖了一些蒲公英葉子充饑。加西的深秋雨驟風急，當晚室外氣溫六度。媽媽問他:"真的要睡在外麵嗎？" 他說是, 不能放棄.他穿好冬裝，在門外陽台上睡了一晚。
第五天，也就是最後一天，下學回來，兒子很高興，再堅持一晚就成功了。他說今天在學校乞討食物比昨天容易，因為班裏其他同學都放棄了，好像隻有他一個人了。但食物還是少的可憐，幾塊兒糖，一小罐兒酸奶，但居然要到一個蘋果，他特別珍惜，舍不得吃要留到睡前最後一刻吃。 我說你幾天都沒吃水果了，趁早吃了吧，太晚吃身體都休息不吸收營養了，他這才吃了。又是一個風雨之夜， 大概是攝入熱量不足，淩晨時發生了短暫小腿抽筋的情況，大約一兩分鍾。
第六天早上，開門迎進來幾天沒有洗臉刷牙的孩子，洗了熱水澡，吃了一頓安心的早飯。全家都很開心，孩子真是長大了。
觀察和交流中我覺得他心理上最大的挑戰是張口向別人要飯，他的同學們也有把擅長的樂器拿到學校裏演奏然後前麵擺個罐要錢的。不洗漱在頭一兩天非常不習慣，但幾天後這根本就不算回事了。以前跟孩子們說過可以吃蒲公英的葉子，也在過去挖過給他們嚐過， 他嫌苦一直看不上，這次主動去挖來吃，還夠靈活。昨天他去洗牙的時候發現了一顆蛀牙，他已經幾年沒蛀牙了，估計是和近期靠吃討來的糖果為生又不刷牙有關。
這個Project是學校給這個班開的傳統小灶。基於習慣和理念的不同，校方不強製學生參加，一般大部分學生都會有選擇地參加，每年完全按照要求做下來的就兩三個人。也有的同學在博客裏激昂文字把這個試驗批駁一番不參加，這都是可以的。但兒子認定他應該也能堅持到底，我們全家都支持。能夠嚐試些艱苦在我們看來是好事，盡管也得勸孩子的媽媽，姥姥等收起關愛，不要給他食物，讓他獨立完成作業。
上周第一次參加了孩子中學的家長會，見到班主任，說起為什麽要在Applied Skill這門課裏安排孩子們體驗無家可歸者， 他是這樣說的， 他們的IB預備班選拔嚴格，跨學區招收全麵發展的好學生，按本地每所小學最多能招兩到三人設置的。這些孩子們將來遲早會在不同崗位成為領導。所以一定要在很小的時候就培養他們感同身受的能力，這樣將來他們到了位置後才能不忘社會，承擔責任。
孩子乞討的那兩天網上有個新聞，國內一個六品官家裏被紀委搜出上億的現金，據說點鈔機當場都燒壞了幾台。 我隨口把這個新聞告訴兒子， 他完全不能理解怎麽一個正常人會幹出在家裏放相當於幾千萬加元贓款這種事，我跟他調侃說這個官員當初一定也是個好學生，但可能沒有體驗過無家可歸的滋味。現在想來我可能應該在他結束這個項目後再告訴他這個新聞。 在他要飯的時候談這個，過於刺激了，不健康。
很多家長們可能都想知道孩子自己是怎麽看無家可歸這個經曆的，征得他同意，我把他那幾天的博客和學校的要求貼在下麵作個參考，希望能對家長們有助。他說他寫的很匆忙也沒時間修改，不太好請大家見諒。
11/10/2014
November 4, 2014
My seven days of "homelessness" is almost over! I'm about 9 hours away from success! According to many people only I have pushed through all seven days with the proper regulations. I can't wait to have good food tomorow. Last night I slept outside in all my winter cloths. Extra pants, socks and sweaters were put on the line with a heavy winter jacket. I actually slept better than I did when sleeping on the ground inside. I didn't wake up at all and the extra cloths that I wore proved to be very useful as extra padding. Tomorrow, I might make a short slideshow of everything I've been through that I've caught on camera. I must say these seven days were far better then I had expected it to be. Begging wasn't all that bad because many people have very generous hearts. After this whole experience, I figured out that we should all appreciate our food and shelter that we have accessible. This experiment really got me into the idea of thinking what it is like to do this all day everyday. I now have a soft spot for the homeless in my heart...
November 3, 2014
I had to beg for food today, all went well and I didn't have to starve. Many people gave me bits and pieces of their lunches and I am very grateful. I am lucky enough to be doing this experiment after Halloween when many people have candy to spare. For breakfast, I had a load of candy that I consumed fairly quickly. For lunch I got a small sandwich from a friend called emma, a few forkful of spaghetti and some small bags of chips and popcorn which I saved for dinner. I didn't feel much hunger but I am constantly taunted by what my friends are eating. When I got back from school, I went out into my neighbourhood in search for dandelion leaves. The leaves are bitter, but they are as close as I can get to vegetables. Tonight I was supposed to have a soccer practice, but it was cancelled because of the rain. I was delighted at first when I heard the news because that would mean I didn't have to sleep wet. Then I realized I still need to sleep outside in the rain tonight... I hope everything goes well today and tomorrow night and I'll be able to reward myself with a good meal Wednesday.
November 2, 2014
When I woke up this morning, I felt really weird. Usually when I wake up im still really tired and want to go back to sleep, but when I woke up on the ground today, I felt really energetic. The cardboard on the ground did nothing it still felt really hard and uncomfterble. Apparently it's supposed to suck in the humidity from the ground so it won't be too cold. For breakfast I had a can of chili. I don't know why, but now that I've had a few cans of perishable food, they all start to taste the same to me. The canned food that I've had were mostly soups. The funny thing is they are not the usual soups we may buy like chicken noodle soup or tomato soup, the ones that I had were quite different. What I had was fast food added with water and somehow got the name "soup". There were "chili soup", " shepards pie soup", " smokin bacon cheese sliders soup" and many other so called soups, they basically all tasted the same to me.
November 1, 2014
Last night was day two of the homeless experience for me. Sleeping without covers did not prove to be a big deal to me, but it felt awkward lying there without anything covering me. I woke up 5 times in the night. Even though I put on three layers of cloths, I still felt a bit cold. This morning I had canned beans and olives. They did however taste better then I thought they would. Before soccer today, I had a meal of spam meat with pasta. That tasted better then the breakfast. My soccer game didn't go as well, we could have won our game but instead we tied it. I personally had so many chances to score, but I didn't. For the few falters we've made, the other team immediately got the ball and got a break away. After the game I went home and had leftover beans form breakfast and a shepards pie soup.
