悠悠寸草心
慈母手中線，遊子身上衣。臨行密密縫，意恐遲遲歸。誰言寸草心, 報得三春暉。
正文
真愛這個詞是在這幾年婚外戀當道，第三者漸漸被世俗所寬容的背景下最常被使用的。因為正常戀愛的男女，順理成章的步入婚姻殿堂是不需要對別人表白他們之間是真愛的。
真愛可以有兩種解釋，一種是真心的相愛，就是陷入愛情中的雙方都付出了真心，純粹被對方的人格魅力所吸引，沒有任何的功利因素。而另一種解釋就是真正的愛情，這是人類社會最美好的情感之一，應該是陽光的，健康的，互相平等的，負責任的，不傷害別人的，是道德的。
可是，婚外戀情可以暴露在陽光之下嗎？它的存在或多或少都會影響到無辜的人，至少在最初，是見不得光的。不能否認，在有一種婚外戀情中，在激情燃燒的那一刻，出軌者和第三者的確是真心的相愛，他們不圖名，不圖利，隻求心靈相通，相互擁有。但是當他們要求的更多，想要以一個家庭的毀滅為代價換取另一個新的家庭的誕生的時候，他們之間的愛情就已經是錯愛，因為他們無法再給愛情賦予道德的色彩，這樣的愛情已經不是真正的愛情。所以說，不管婚外戀情多麽美好，都不是真正的愛情。隻有戀愛的雙方都是自由身的情況下，才可能有真正的愛情發生。
愛情不是犯錯的借口和理由，但很多出軌者和第三者混淆了，或者故意偷換了真愛的含義，他們堅持真愛無罪，事實上是把他們心中真心的相愛誤讀成真正的愛情，而簡單的用一個真愛代替。這就是很多第三者高舉真愛大旗，也要把錯愛進行到底的原因吧。
這種時候，他們之間的愛隻能叫做愚愛了。
真正的愛情是要放到
時間與金錢的
煉獄中去檢驗的 ........
真愛一定要擁有嗎？
其實真愛的含義有很多的，並不是你所說的隻有這兩種。
你犯了概念性的錯誤。
You are so wonderful. You really have a big heart. And, you open my view.
Thank you. Take care, my dear.
說實話，在自己沒有經曆這場變故之前，我沒有花很多精力去考慮什麽是愛，或怎樣去經營婚姻的問題。日子隨心所欲的過著，總是很忙碌，雖然平淡但也不乏生趣。
應該感謝上天給了我這樣一個審視自己婚姻的機會，一個重新認識愛的機會。
是不是真正的愛情是要放到時間的長河中去檢驗的。戀愛時的愛情是激情，陷入其中的雙方都是付出真心的。而在漫長的婚姻裏的愛情是生活中的點滴關懷，是為對方無怨無悔的付出，事實上，之前我們彼此都做到了，而且在事情發生後仍然是這樣做的。隻是在這之前彼此的方式方法不對路，現在正在改善中。。。
我相信這樣真正的愛情才是戰勝一切的法寶。
Thank you to allow me share the view with you.
Yes, 不被他們的想法所左右, not only for this thing, this shall be applied all the things you deal with in your daily personal life, in your professional career.
With the open mind and open view, you have your principles and make judgment on you own.
I can tell the golden value you have, I do hope your husband to figure it out soon.
Please also allow me to say below:
After reviewing the event you and your husband experienced, you should take a good and real look of your husband and yourself (who he is, who you are) and educate your husband and yourself at the same time.
Regarding to the 3rd person, she has nothing to do with you. Your husband should handle all the her issues and not let any of those issues bug you, your kids and your family life if you are a good educator and he is a good "student". He shall have all actions and reactions to protect the family.
In another words, if your husband fails to handle those issues as you expect, you shall think more and ......
Take care, my dear.
也許是中文英文表達思想的差異，但我完全明白你想要跟我說的是什麽。我知道你不是在跟我爭論，事實上你的觀點對我啟發很大。我不應該被他們的想法所左右。
非常感謝你的討論。
Yes, I know that you not only have 同情心, but also know 愛. You are a such wonderful girl. You have my full respect from my heart.
I agree that 真愛在每個人心中的定義是不一樣的，當局者和旁觀者的看法也不一樣. You may have your own explanation and definition of "true love". Mine is a little bit different. In my view, there is only one true love, which is (only) with 真心, 陽光，健康，責任,人格, 道德, and in day and day your life (生活) .
If 他們生活在一起了，"真愛" becomes "後悔", for me, this is not a true love. No matter what the explanation people can have.
OK, I am not arguing here, my heart is going out to you. I try to let you see a different point and open a wider view. Maybe, I am a "旁觀者", it is easy to say 'anything'. Please don't take me wrong.
However, I still try to pass this point to you: don't take their words, no matter what they said to you about the true love they have. They don't know what they are talking about.
I do hope that it would not take too long for your husband to recognize the gold value you have.
Take care.
祝福你！
我可能是太有同情心了吧。他們那樣說，我也相信。當然，真愛在每個人心中的定義是不一樣的，當局者和旁觀者的看法也不一樣。但真正涉及到我和孩子的切身利益，我是不會讓步的。
有句老話說“妻不如妾，妾不如偷，偷不如偷不著。”你是對的，他們的愛是因為得不到而想象出來的，真的讓他們生活在一起了，未必就是真愛。隻是如果那時再後悔，對孩子的傷害又該怎樣算？
謝謝你的祝福，我會努力做好我自己，為自己，為孩子，為我們的未來。
"他們曾經都是這樣跟我說的，他們之間是真愛。而且到目前為止還是她堅持下去的理由"
I don't think that they know what they are talking about. They just make up their imagination and dream as it is "他們之間是真愛". And, you shall not take what they saying too.
Life is life, never say “真愛”until you really know what 真愛 means to your in your day and day life.
Please don’t take what they told you. Without 人格, they are nothing. Whatever they mean about “愛” is nothing too.
For you, please don't think too much. Drop down your bottom line as a person with your 人格, be a better yourself. You will have the ture love.
Take care.
是的，你解讀的一點沒錯。他們曾經都是這樣跟我說的，他們之間是真愛。而且到目前為止還是她堅持下去的理由。
這就是我要說明“真心的相愛”不等同於“真正的愛情”的原因，雖然都可以用“真愛”來代替。沒有闡述清楚，讓你見笑了。
What is real love? The real love includes all you stated: 真心, 沒有功利, 陽光，健康，責任的。This is a real love of a person with人格魅力 and 道德的.
If I did not mistake you, you tried to indicate that there is ‘love’ between your husband and that lady and both of them told you that is a real love. They do 真心的相愛.
If you mean that, then I have to say you are wrong.
They may think that they really love each other. But, they don’t. That is just their imagination. If you really let them be together, see what happened. Life is life. There is only one real love. To have a real love, you have to understand what it means to your real daily life.
I wish you understand what I am trying to say here.
Take care.
這正是我在這裏想闡明的，誰也不能保證一輩子隻愛一個人。如果想一直生活在愛情裏，請認認真真結束每一段戀情，回到起點再重新開始。真心相愛沒有錯，但是妨礙了別人，傷害了孩子就是錯。
What is wrong with this world?