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Why I have a husband

(2009-02-03 17:35:38) 下一個
Sometimes ppl think we get marrried for security. I got married when I was still young and ambitious, "security" was simply not in my dictionary yet. But I have to admit I am much more secure with him now.

Being secure, that is, I can sit back assuredly and say, "Yes, I'm a workaholic, but I have a life too."

There's someone who upsets because I tell him I have to work 70 hours a week for the next month, but drive by and drop a dinner box at my workplace for me. There's someone with him I can just be myself. Dancing like a kid when I got a payrise or throwing things around when I lost a promotion. There's someone who spends a day sittting miserably in a corner of various shops wating for me choosing a birthday gift for myself. There's someone for whom, one day I will grudgingly give up my job and be a stay-at-home mum. I will complain about it time to time. I'm quite sure about that. But at the same time, I know at the back of my heart that I'm giving up one thing I love for a man I love better.

Being secure, that is, I can sit back and smile, " No, I'm not as confused as before." A job sharpens our abilities, but a marriage, a marriage presents us an opportunity to mature.

In this two person's world, I expect, I disappoint, I look deeper into my heart, then I see what I really want. I disagree, I argue, I confront, then I know where I stand. I feel, I understand, I reason, I compromise, I admit this world is not all about me. then I'm an adult.

Being secure, that is, after all these years' happiness and sadness, I realise I don't have A husband, I have THE husband. The one for whom I changed from thinking "If you love me, you would do this for me." to " If I love him as what he is, why I push him this much." Maybe one day he will change, and my feeling for him would be different. But everything in our life changes. Do we ever consider stop living just because things we have at this moment will change the next moment?

To me, marriage is like life. You live it, but it's not completely in your control, and it doesn't run as you plan. So as long as you're happy now, it's worthwhile.
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hl1108 回複 悄悄話 澳壇結識,跑來逛逛,發現一才女,哈哈哈。
你的中文俏皮,英文工整,多多潑墨,分享分享呦。
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