南山鬆
陽光明媚清風起，微波蕩漾碧藍天。
正文
1 Digital Life 數碼硯聽
The air hostess was in the small kitchen at the back of the airplane preparing the trays for lunch when a little old lady came and spoke to her.
空姐正在飛機後部的小廚房內準備午餐的托盤，一位小個子老太太走過來對她說。
A: Could you please tell me where the ladies' lavatory is in this plane?
請問你能告訴我飛機上的女衛生間在什麽地方嗎?
B: Yes, madam. It is right at the other end of the airplane at the front.
哦，夫人，就在飛機的那一頭—在前邊。
(The little old lady went too far. She walked all the way to the front of the airplane, opened the door in front of her, and the captain of the airplane and the other officers. They were all busy at their work and did not see her. She went out again, shut the door and returned to the air hostess.
小個子老太太走過了頭，她一直朝飛機的前部走去了。拉開麵前的門，看見機長和其他機務人員。他們都忙於自己的工作，沒有看見她。她又走了出來，關上門，回到空姐那裏。)
A: Oh, didn't you find it, madam?
噢，你沒有找到衛生間，夫人?
B: Yes, I did. But there four men in the ladies' lavatory watching television.
我找到了，但是衛生間那兒有四個男人在看電視。
2 Hi-technology 高新科技
Sam is at the airport waiting for his flight which leaves at 6:00. He has forgotten wear his watch，so he looks for someone to ask the time. He spots one man walking past carrying 2 suitcases and sporting a fabulous hi-tech watch，so he approaches that man.
山姆正在機場等候6點的班機。他忘記戴手表，所以要找個人問一下時間。他看到一個人提著兩隻大箱子從身邊走過，手腕上戴的高科技手表，十分惹人注目。於是，山姆走向他。
A: Excuse me, could you tell me what the time is by your watch?
對不起，您可以告訴我現在的時間嗎?
B: Sure, which country?
當然可以，您要問哪個國家的時間?
A: How many countries have you got?
您有多少個國家的時間?
B: All the countries in the world.
世界上所有國家的時間!
A: Wow! That's a pretty cool watch you've got there.
喔!您的表簡直妙極了。
B: That's nothing. This watch also has a GPS facility. It can even send and receive fax and e-mail. Besides it can receive NTSC television channel s and display them on its miniature active color pixel！LCI screen!
這不算什麽。這塊表還有一個全球定位係統裝置。它甚至能收發傳真和電子郵件。還有，它能接收N製的彩電頻道並在其袖珍液晶顯示屏上顯示!
A: Boy, that's incredible. I wish I had a watch like that one. You wouldn't consider selling it by any chance?
好家夥，這簡直不可思議。我也想有一塊像這樣的表。您不會想要賣掉它吧?
B: Well，actually the novelty has worn off by now，so for $ 900，if you want it，it's yours!
實際上，這已經不新奇了，所以如果您想要，給我900美元，它就是您的了!
(Dam can hardly whip out his checkbook fast enough and hands over a check for $900. The seller takes the watch and gives it to him.
山姆匆忙開了一張900美元的支票，遞給那人。那人摘下手表交給山姆。)
B: Congratulations，here is your new hi-tech watch! (handing the 2 suitcases over as well) And here are the batteries!
祝賀您，這是您新的高科技手表!(然後把兩隻箱子也遞給山姆。)給您，這些是電池。
3 Exam考試
Professor is handing out the examination papers to a roomful of students.
教授正在給全班學生發考卷。
A: You will have exactly two hours. Under no circumstances will I accept a paper given to me after the deadline has passed. Do you understand?
你們有整整兩個小時的時間，超過規定時間交上來的考卷，不管什麽原因，我絕對不收，明白嗎?
B: Yes.
是。
(After two hours.兩小時以後。)
A: Time is up.
時間到。
B: Wait.
等一下。
(About 15 minutes later. A students come to the platform and give his paper to the professor.
大約15分鍾以後，一個學生走向講台，並把卷子給了教授。)
A: Didn’t you hear what I said?
你難道沒聽到我說的話嗎?
B: Yes，I did. But do you know who I am! Professor?
不，我聽到了，但你知道我是誰嗎，教授?
A: No.
不知道。
B: Terrific.
太好了。
Then he stuffed his paper into the middle of the pile.
然後他把他的考卷塞進整堆考卷中。
4 Doctors’ hunting醫生們打獵
This story is about another five doctor who went duck hunting one day. The five doctors were a general practice physician，a pediatrician, a psychiatrist，a surgeon and a pathologist.
這個故事是關於另外5個醫生的故事，一天他們去打野鴨，這五個醫生包括一個全科醫生、一個兒科醫生、一個精神病醫生、一個外科醫生和病理學家。
A: Look，a bird is coming winging overhead.
看，一隻鳥在頭頂飛過。
B: Why did you raise your shotgun and then hesitate?
你為什麽舉起槍又猶豫了呢?
A: I am not quite sure it's a duck，I think that I will have to get a second opinion，but the bird was long gone.
我不敢肯定那是不是鴨子，我想我必須聽聽另一醫生的診斷意見。但這時鳥飛走了。
B: Look! Another duck.
看!另一隻鴨子。
C: Why don't you shoot at it?
你為什麽不打它?
B: (Muttering) I am also unsure if it is really a duck in my sight and besides，it might have babies，I'll have to do some more investigations.
(喃喃自語)我也不能肯定那是不是鴨子。並且那隻鳥可能還懷著小鳥，我必須作進一步調查。
C: But the creature make good its escape.
但是那家夥從容不迫地逃脫了。
(Next to spy a bird flying was the sharp-eyed psychiatrist. Shotgun shouldered，he was more certain of his intended prey's identity.
然後，是眼尖的精神病醫生看到了飛鳥。用肩頂住槍托，他比其他人更清楚自己瞄準的獵物是什麽。)
D: Why do you hesitate since you know it is a duck?
既然你知道那是隻鴨子你還猶豫什麽?
C: Now，I know it's a duck，but does it know it's a duck?
是啊，現在我知道那是隻鴨子，可它自己知道嗎?
(Finally，a fourth foul sped past and this time the surgeon's weapon pointed sky wards. BOOM! The surgeon lowered his smoking gun and turned nonchalantly to the pathologist beside him.
最後，第四隻鴨子快速地飛過。這次是外科醫生把獵槍對準了天空。“嘣”一聲槍響，外科醫生放下槍口還在冒煙的獵槍，扭過頭，麵無表情地對身邊的病理學家說。)
D: Good to see if that was a duck，will you?
去看看那是不是一隻野鴨，可以嗎?
5 The Storm of Movies 電影風暴
Mr. and Mrs. Jones seldom go out in the evening. But last Saturday, Mrs. Jones want to go to the cinema.
瓊斯夫婦晚上很少出去。可上星期六，瓊斯太太想去看電影。
A: There is a good film at the cinema tonight. Shall we go and see it?
今晚電影院有場好電影，我們去看嗎?
(Mr. Jones was quite happy about it. So they went and both of them enjoyed the film very much! When they came out of the cinema, it was al-ready 11 o'clock. They got into their car and began driving home. It was quite dark.
瓊斯先生對此感到非常高興。於是他們便去了，他倆兒都喜愛這部影片。當他們從電影院出來時已經11點鍾了。他們趕緊上了車，開始朝家開去，天色很黑。)
A: Look，Bill. A woman is running along the road very fast, and a man is running after her. Can you see them?
快看，比爾!有個女人正沿著公路飛快地奔跑，後麵還有一個男人在追她，你看見了嗎?
B: Yes, I can.(Driving the car slowly near the woman) Can I help you?
是的，我看見了。(把車慢慢地開到女人身旁)我能幫助你嗎?
C: No, thanks. My husband and I always run home after the film because whoever gets home late will wash the dishes.
不，謝謝。我和我丈夫每次看完電影之後總是跑著回家，因為誰最後到家，誰就要洗盤子。
6 Birthday Party 生日派對
On a special Teacher's Day, a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. First, the florist's son handed her a gift.
在教師節裏，一位幼兒園教師正在接受孩子們送給她的禮物，首先花匠的兒子遞上他的禮物。
A:I bet I know what it is...some flowers.
我敢打賭我知道裏麵是什麽……是一些花。
B: That is right, but how did you know?
是的，可是你是怎麽知道的呢？
A: Just a wild guess.
瞎猜的。
(The second pupil is the candy store owner's daughter. The teacher hands her gift over head.
第二個學生是糖果店老板的女兒。老師把她送的禮物舉起來。)
A: I bet I can guess what it is...a box of candy.
我敢打賭我知道裏麵是什麽，是一盒糖果。
C: That's right. But how did you know?
對了，但你怎麽知道的?
A: Just a lucky guess.
碰巧猜出來的。
(The third gift is from the liquor store owner's son. The teacher holds it over head but it is leaking. She touches a drop of the leakage with her finger and tastes it.
第三份禮物來自於酒店老板的兒子，老師把它舉起來，但有液體漏了出來，她用手蘸了一滴漏出來的液體，嚐了一下味道。)
A: Is it wine?
是果酒嗎?
D: No.
不是。
(The teacher repeated the process touching another drop of leakage to her tongue.
老師又用舌頭嚐了一滴漏出來的東西。)
A: Is it champagne?
是香檳嗎?
D: No.
不是。
A: Now, I give up. What is it?
好吧，我猜不著了，裏麵到底是什麽呢?
D: A puppy.
是一隻小狗。
點點好！很高興你開心：）
周末快樂！
哈哈，never try to taste something that you don't know:)
Yanyan, have a nice weekend!
嗯，雪花，you never know what's inside~~~
雪花，周末快樂！
Yes, it is too cool~~~
Rebecca, have a nice weekend!
問好小小，周末快樂！