A Worthy Career Choice for Men - 值得考慮的職業選擇
A few day ago, I was chatting with my mom on the phone. In the mid of normal lecturing, my mother asked me, " Do you still remember little Dr. Tang?"
"Of course, how could I forget about her? What happens to her? “I answered my mom's question with a worried follow-up question. Nowadays, we heard so many tragic stories about young and middle aged people dying unexpectedly all the time in China.
"She is alright,and she wondered if you have any suggestions for son's major when going to America this fall, her son does not like to study engineering or medicine or law "
"He can try to study fashion design." without thinking, I slipped my tongue.
"Be serious, he is a 16 years old young boy." My mom made her complaint.
"Mom, I am serious.A successful fashion designer can have almost everything- fame, fortune, and lots of other good stuffs" I stopped short to mention other great benefits.,"Please just tell her what I recommended, and let her son to make the decision." I rebutted with a plea to my mom.
I do remember little Dr. Tang very well. In 80s, one of favorable sports that my mom enjoyed was that she would , at her day off , dressed me up and bring me to her hospital. When other doctors, male and females, praised me with "ohs" and 'ahs", my mom's beautiful face would light up with radiance and contents as if she won a "trophy".
Comparing with other seasoned doctors in the maternity ward, Dr. Tang was a young graduate just freshened out from Shanghai First Medical College. She was a pretty but shy lady. While other doctors were busy to"abuse" me by pinching my cheeks or other body parts or attempting me with candies or other snacks with some preset conditions, she just stood next to my mom and smiled, and was ready to rescue me, from those "craze old ladies" who time to time would bite me without any justifications, by offering to buy me my favorite snakes - 娃娃頭雪糕 or chocolate-flavored candy which shaped like golden coins.
If she happened to buy herself own snacks at the stores, she would let me take a bite and then ask me how I thought about it as if my opinion would matter to her. Before she returned me to my mom, she would gave me a tight hug and kissed me on my face. The strange thing I remember was that her face would turn red without an apparent reason. But, as a little boy surrounded by a group of "Giants" in white gowns in those "career days" in hospital, I liked little Dr.Tang's humane treatment, and her sweet and soft "bribery".
Through my mom, I know Dr. Tang was promoted to a high position in the hospital and married quite late. Now, I can't believe that now Dr.Tang's son is ready for the college, and she is willing to listen to the little boy whom she held, many years ago, his little hands, walking on the tree-covered path of the hospital and sharing snacks. The scary thing is that my detailed memories are still fresh as if it were yesterday.
I double that Dr. Tang would take my advice seriously to permit her only son to study fashion design as a way to make a living even I think if she is willing to give it a try, she and her son may thank me for my suggestion years later.
Chinese parents are very special "breeds" on the earth. On one hand, they could be very protective and willing to scarify themselves; on the other hand, they are eager to push their kids into the system of formal education early without mercy. It's no surprise the some zealous Chinese parents would begin to teach their kids as early as their kids are still in deciduous teeth. If it's possible, Chinese parents would prefer their kids to skip grades and get into the famous Name Brand University. Furthermore, they would often use their influences to advise their kids to choose college majors that have the potential to be professors, doctors, attorneys, investment bankers,engineers ... In other words, they'd want their children to make them to be respectful, noble and prestige as they were advised by their parents years ago.
I think that there is nothing wrong by Chinese parents’ assumption, in which a time-tested and reputable careers such as professors, doctors, attorneys, investment bankers and engineers may bring stable financial foundation, let alone to find a marriage suitor easier. Nevertheless, they forget one thing - the world has become much flatter now than ever before, globalization has modified the social and economic landscapes to a degree that almost any career, even the ones that were shunned away by our parents now are becoming very prestige and profitable. For instance, fashion designer would be one.
Here is a thing, if I could turn back clock, let's say 15 years, I might want to study fashion design. Yes, I may make less money but at the same time, I will have less stress and more fun, plus tons of benefits that men could not get in other occupations.
Speaking of benefits as fashion designers, it's definitely worth of consideration from a man's point of view. Let me use some simple words to paint a picture for people would think I am crazy, otherwise.
If a guy is a successful fashion designer, he would be highly admired across all walks of life; in particular, hundreds and thousands ladies/fans around the globe, from celebrities such as the first lady and Hollywood movie stars to ordinary people.(Unlike us, the streeters, often are given no credits whatsoever even we worked more than 12 hrs per day and still are called nasty names from congressmen to average Joes), then there are glamour, lime-light, travel-around-the-world, party-til-death, oh yeah, the huge pile of money which soon follows if the name brand takes off. Do I mention anther huge unique perk - working with these stunningly beautiful young female models descended from every corner of the planet all the time.
I am not sure how many of you ever went to the back stages of the major fashion shows, I am lucky enough to visit her few times when she was working. I am telling you guys, the views were just marvelous. She "instructed" me before I went. "Just keep eye contact with the girls and keep smiling." That is easy for her to say, when I standing next to these practically naked and beautiful girls in such close distance, I was the first one to be embarrassed, not to mention I have to deal with my male body function. However, supposing you are a male fashion designer, you might get used to it. :))
Are there any objections? If you are men, I think that I could just make my convincing case to you.
Note:
1)Put one video clip of Shiatzy Chen's work from Paris Fashion Week of last week. I kind of like her work which leverages many traditional Chinese culture and heritage. Last year, I bought a couple of her designed piece for my mom's birthday, my mom like them because they are so wearable.
People often mistaken the west for fashion inspirations, but the fact is that even the country like France, fashion became popular since 1670s, yet the Chinese stylish fashion trend might start around 600s in Tang Dynasty. Go figure!
2) The photo comes from Internet.
AJ,你對囡囡頭職業選擇的寬容心態，真是難能可貴。 想一想， 一個青年人要用可觀的時間去麵對工作，如果不喜歡自己職業， 還要苦撐，那麽成功的可能大概是可想而知了。
也祝福你不但能過把癮， 而且讓你大有斬獲，彌補過去無法選擇的缺失。
我想我最大的遺憾就是那個時代沒有什麽選擇，能有機會選擇大家都看好的職業已經很幸運了。希望在這個年紀還能趕個末班車，過過癮頭。
也因為如此，我對女兒沒有任何限製，在加拿大謀生比較容易，我也不要求她成功，隻要衣食無憂，開開心心就好
完全支持你提出的成功兩個基本條件 - 才華與興趣。我覺得， 一個人才華蠻重要，但智商畢竟和先天有不少關連，父母能左右的空間可以說是相對不很大。 可是興趣這一項就不同了，它是一個彈性比較寬廣的區域，家人，朋友和環境的影響都可以起凸顯甚至厄殺的功能。 譬如說，中國的父母一般會不會讓孩子“沉迷”畫漫通，或者注意服裝的款式， 他們會有意無意地把這些興趣歸納為旁門左道。同時，他們會鼓勵並誘導他們去專精奧數，物理，化學，語言等有關幫助進一流大學的項目。 所以，在某種程度上，父母的影響和態度有關鍵的推、阻力。 由於西方的父母與東方父母在尊重和培養孩子的興趣這樣的欄目的表現不一樣， 所以，結果也形成孩子在職業選擇上的鮮明對比。
我這樣講，不是反對專精數理化和寫作，我僅僅是希望中國這樣一個文明古國可以減少偏見，父母可以更主動地資助子女自身的興趣發展。 我們的社會也不要動不動就用偽娘，陰柔，二貨這樣negative的語言去攻擊青年男人，難道真正男人的正確標準就隻能是定格在出口成髒，熱衷肉欲，傾向暴力，鄙視人文，衣冠拉遝，異味飄香的大丈夫上嗎？試想一下，像李安這樣男人是不是屬於偽娘呢？像他的父母和他的太太那樣支持和尊重他的興趣的事例，可不可以給我們一個參考和反思的元素。
我覺得，男人的成功，和選擇什麽樣職業的並沒有決定的因素，卻和興趣所在有不可分割得源淵，如果我們享受工作的樂趣 我們就比較可能可把工作做得出色。順便提一下，我從小就喜歡賺錢，也不懼怕挑戰和風險，我記得， 我13歲的時候就從一個港商手中掙到我第一桶金，可是， 我家人卻不以為然。大學裏，常常被同學嘰笑為小孔方兄一枚。我父母一直都希望我步他們的後塵-教書或救人，但我最後還是決定讓我的興趣做主打，今天雖然我不算成功，但至少我比較快樂。 阿Q一下。:）
看我身邊的中國父母，我覺得真正鼓勵孩子發展個人興趣的不多。我們中國人好象是特別務實的民族，特別看中自己那碗“飯”。移民父母尤甚，可能是因為自己不容易。
理想的選擇，我覺得應該是做自己喜愛的事情養活自己，充分享受生活的種種樂趣，而不是活著隻為了掙錢吃飯。不是務實不好，而是過於功利地生活就容易喪失一些趣味。
我想，AJ對顏色和線條有如此好的感覺和應用，如果你是一位服裝設計師的話，設計的能量一點不會弱。你大概不知道，夏姿陳品牌的創始人及設計師並沒有正宗學習過服裝設計，但她卻可以成功地把一個neo-Chinese chic的理念推進國際服裝設計舞台，讓名家側目並讓她的設計受到推崇。