A letter to the class of 25 from an ivy league dropout
Dear Class of 25 and onward,
As many decisions roll out and many people here decide where they will spend the next four years of their lives, I want to share an important lesson I learned. To introduce myself, I'm currently a freshman at a nearby community college in Southern California (LA), a high school class of 2024. I come from a lower middle class income family and a strictly Asian(Japanese) background where many of my relatives went to "elite" universities in the US and Japan.
Last year around this time, I got into Princeton, which was my dream school. I cried out of joy when I opened the decision, and my parents also teared up because I got a full ride. I was the salutatorian of my high school, and I had pretty much all A's with a 4.7 GPA and 1580 SAT and 31 ACT. At the time, I felt like I was on top of the world, and to this day I cannot explain how happy I was when I opened my decision. I had other choices such as Berkeley, UCLA, Duke, USC, Boston University, Dartmouth, and a few other schools with a lot of recognition. As Princeton was the number one school on many college ranking websites and the brand had incredible recognition worldwide wide plus the full ride, it was a no-brainer for me to pick Princeton.
When I arrived at Princeton, all my expectations were different. I failed almost all my classes I was taking, I was not able to make any friends, and all the academic pressure and prestige crushed my mental health. I lied to my parents about doing well and about having a lot of friends at Princeton because they had a lot of expectations of me and did not want them to worry about my academics as well as my social life there. As my mental health got worse and worse, I had thoughts about killing myself and just ending it all. This, combined with my failing relationship, which I was putting too much time, money, and thoughts into, completely destroyed my mental health, and I was at the point where my friends from home called an ambulance for me, and I was hospitalized. Because of the combination of a failed relationship (breakup) and my poor academic and mental health during my stay at Princeton, I dropped out after 1 semester without my parents' approval or anyone's approval but mine.
**What can other people learn from my experience?**
If I were to go back in time, I would tell myself to pick a school where I actually felt comfortable instead of picking prestige and reputation over anything, and I would tell anyone in the world that's trying to decide what school they should go to the same thing. Because I prioritized the "wrong" requirements for me to pick a school, I now struggle with depression from my experience at Princeton, a failed relationship with my now ex, and a sour relationship with my parents that formed after I dropped out of Princeton.
My main advice to the class of 25 and forward is that I want them to know that these schools are extremely selective for a reason. There is a reason why many students with 4.0 GPAs get rejected. Not just Princeton but the Ivy League and many other selective schools are like that because they require a certain type of people with unique goals and personalities to succeed at those schools. I mainly attended Princeton because of the name brand and the networking opportunity, but a lot of people I interacted with were entrepreneurs, world leaders, and had incredible talents. These people are trying to change the world for the better and compared to that, my reason for attending Princeton sounds like nothing. If you want to attend, you should have a REAL reason, not just because of the Ivy League brand name.
Picking a school is super easy, it's just putting a deposit and a single click, but that decision can cost you everything. I currently have depression, and other lifelong scars on my heart. If I could go back in time, I 100% would. *I don't want anyone to go through the same experience as me and suffer like what I am going through* right now, which is why I decided to post this, and I'm just trying to find people to hangout together near my area if they are willing to because my wish for myself is to heal as soon as possible from my wound and make new friends.
Thank you,
KN
