He needs more attention from her. She needs to pay more attention to him. Her priority should be him, not the younger one. His behavior indicates imbalance in term of care paid by her. Her tendency toward the younger one is understandable. But he senses the shift and feels the loss. First-born child has a special place in a family. If you swap the order, dysfunctions ensure. A smart (and sane) mother cuddles the oldest, the rest will fall in place naturally.
There is a difference between he does things to please his mother in order to get attention and he does things to please his own sense of self-worth. A false self or a genuine self stems from here, its ramifications are life long.
For a six-year-old, you started at the right time.
Give all he needs for his chess pursuit, books, tornies, etc..
You are lucky he likes to read. He needs a wider variety.
Children's version of the Bible. Find one that fits his reading level. He needs a wider view of the world in time and space. (Jewish kids have advantages by reading the Torah at an early age, remembering the figures and events aids brain developement.)
If in the US, the Framers biographies, the histories, the ideas debated during the Founding. There are books for his age.
With the above, no one can intimidated him when he grows up because he knows what is right and what is wrong, and if anyone wants to dismiss him, he has the fortitude because he identifies with an idea.
Get all the books by Larry Gonick, his Cartoon History books. He can develope interests by reading them.
Magazines from cricketmedia.com. He can develope ideas for his writing.
Soccer is good team sport.
Ask him to keep a diary. Encourage him to think about his feelings and write them down. If he can only come up with laundry lists, you should find out the reason.
Ask about his ideas. Give him time to decide, and then follow through. Do not insist that he cleans his plate, just eat as much or as little as he wants.
Life is defined by choices, and you cannot have it all. When you force a lot stuff onto him, you should not expect him grown up to be his own man.
