偶爾看到以前screenshot, 太逗了，說怎樣把換燈泡寫進簡曆，難道簡曆就是不說人話？
How would you write I changed a light bulb on your resume?
如何在簡曆裏寫我換過燈泡
Single-handedly managed the suc-cessful upgrade and deployment of new environmental illumination system with zero cost overruns and zero safety incidents.
獨自一人成功完成了新環境照明係統的升級和部署，成本零超支，安全事故零發生。
Gemini AI告訴我：
That is a classic piece of corporate speak gold. Its all about thepower verbsand emphasizing theimpact(even if the impact is just being able to see in the dark).
If youre looking to give other mundane tasks the resume glow-up, here are a few more translations for your amusement:
| Ordinary Task | Resume-Ready Version |
|---|---|
| Took out the trash | Managed the end-to-end lifecycle of waste disposal and sanitation protocols to ensure a clutter-free workspace. |
| Washed dishes | Spearheaded the decontamination and restoration of high-use equipment while maintaining 100% adherence to hygiene standards. |
| Brewed coffee | Optimized team productivity by facilitating the extraction and distribution of critical energy-enhancing compounds. |
| Sent an email | Facilitated cross-functional digital communication to align key stakeholders on mission-critical updates. |
| Watered the plants | Supervised the hydration and life-support systems for internal botanical assets to maintain optimal aesthetic environmental health. |
職場黑話翻譯手冊（中文版）
如果你想把日常瑣事寫出年薪百萬的感覺，可以參考這個表格：
| 日常瑣事 | 簡曆潤色版（職場黑話） |
|---|---|
| 倒垃圾 | 負責廢棄物處置全生命周期的管理及環境衛生協議的執行，確保辦公空間的零障礙化。 |
| 洗碗 | 牽頭執行高頻使用設備的去汙與還原，同時嚴格遵守 100% 的衛生安全達標率。 |
| 泡咖啡 | 通過促進關鍵能量增強化合物（咖啡因）的提取與分發，顯著優化了團隊的整體生產力。 |
| 發郵件 | 推進跨職能數字化溝通，確保關鍵利益相關者在核心業務更新上達成高度一致。 |
| 給盆栽澆水 | 監管內部植物資產的補水與生命支持係統，以維護公司環境審美的最佳健康狀態。 |
職場小貼士：雖然這些例子帶有幽默成分，但其中的邏輯是相通的：在寫簡曆時，強調效率（無超支）和風險控製（零事故）確實會讓麵試官眼前一亮。
