如作絕句看,平仄還是有點問題。三句不粘可算折腰體,但結句就應平平仄仄仄平平,現在與和年都出律了。建議末句倒一下
所有跟帖:
• 謝曲師鼓勵,指正!釆納,改了,再謝! -潛東籬- ♂ (0 bytes) () 04/21/2016 postreply 11:55:56
• 謝曲師鼓勵,指正!釆納,改了,再謝! -潛東籬- ♂ (0 bytes) () 04/21/2016 postreply 11:55:56
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