和昨天跟貼比,格律糾正了。第二句還可提高。三四句再讚,大好!
本文內容已被 [ 曲未平 ] 在 2013-08-18 18:59:39 編輯過。如有問題,請報告版主或論壇管理刪除.
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• 再謝曲師點評!偶繼續努力。: ) -阿留- ♂ (0 bytes) () 08/18/2013 postreply 09:12:40
• 再謝曲師點評!偶繼續努力。: ) -阿留- ♂ (0 bytes) () 08/18/2013 postreply 09:12:40
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