Your daughter graduated already. For comparison, what did Wesley have that the state college could not provide beside the prestige factor? She was a CS major and your state college has a much better ranking.
I would really appreciate the comparisons and real-life analysis of pros and cons. Been there. Done that. Nobody can do better than you in this analysis.
Is it because future spouse of higher caliber? Is it because better networking?
Obviously if you would like to send your son to another private college, you think private college is better than a public one.