Tim Loves Mom

After nearly six months of waiting, Tim was elated when the news came late Fri 

afternoon that he was accepted at B, a prep school. "I never saw mom this

happy." he told me on our weekly hike the next morning. "Well. That's what this 

is all about, isn't it?" I said.

 

I don't know if this applies to others but three generations of boys in our

family have all worked hard to please their moms. In spite of a late start and a

couple of setbacks, my dad went to college and made his folks (mom and sister)

proud. When I went to university, it was more of mom's dream than mine that was

fulfilled. Today, it looks like the same theme is replaying in Tim.

 

I recognized this force early in school where one's future and worth and how he  

was judged by others depended solely on his grades. But for me, the real 

strength was mom. Her smile was the best award, her praise the highest honor,

her silence the unbearable torture, and her sadness the eternal punishment. My 

mom never needed to scold me or help me. She simply suffered and loved.

 

I was asked by a mom once on how to help her kid achieve in school. "Let him know

that you love him and that you suffer to make his future brighter. He will do 

anything to love you back." Why is this so? It could be evolution--those who

didn't follow the rule died out. Regardless, maternal visions seem to determine

where we go, at least in the first stage of life.

 

Tim was bubbly all the time. "I'm getting better at math, Dad." "I hope you are

not bragging." "Oh. No. My grades went up when mom finally couldn't help with my

homework and had to leave me alone." Yes. He is on the same track.

[7grizzly]

回複 '暖冬cool夏' 的評論 : Thank you, 暖冬, for reading and your kind comments. To shape a boy, mom beats dad hands down. Of course, mom's vision can end, which for me was college. Afterwards, the kid has to (or finally has the chance to) make his own sense of the world...

[暖冬cool夏]

So in this sense, love is both the carrot and the stick:))
You are exactly right that parents' visions determine the future of kids-- their life choices, and how far they can go.
"Her smile was the best award, her praise the highest honor, her silence the unbearable torture, and her sadness the eternal punishment."
+1, a very good sentence, and you were a good boy who felt your mom's feelings.