Tim's July 4th

13 has been a magical year so far for Tim. The physical changes seem to come
overnight. He's grown almost as tall as me and probably heavier. Around March, he
did two things that I couldn't: the single leg squat and the 24kg kettlebell press. In
my eyes, he is a little boy no more.

He has his own opinions. When he told me that one BJJ training mate was wearing
Jocko's "Discipline Equals Freedom" T-shirt, I asked why wouldn't he. "I don't
want to broadcast a message." he said "If I can live up to it, I don't need to
wear the shirt. If I cannot, wearing it would mean I'm a fake."

He no longer whines when we hike Mission Peak which we have done weekly for
the past three months. It is still a struggle given his weight and the Xero shoes
but his attitude has changed from fearing what is to come to one-step-at-a-time.
His weight-lifting helps and his confidence grows every week.

Tim's spirit was often uplifted as we came down the summit and he would talk
more. "Not bad at all." he would often say with relief and we would talk about
things happening in our lives. This Sat, we remembered last year's trip to Canada.

"I just love Tim Horton's donuts." he began "Nothing around here can even compare.
The cookies in Starbucks aren't bad but they come in plastic bags and their price is
ridiculous. Chocolate glazed is my favorite, BTW."

"Me too. I just love a nanaimo bar with coffee." That opened the gate of memory:
"You skip breakfast as you have a class at 8:00am. The hardest part is to get out
of the apartment and into the blizzard. After diving in, you trudge for two miles
toward school, passing on your way many houses you wish you had lived in just
to be closer to your destination, and you are starving and numb. After what seems
like forever you arrive at the bright little house under the red roof next
to campus. It shines through the morning darkness and the dancing snowflakes
and it looks so inviting. You wipe your boots, open the door, and walk into the
embrace of the warmth that so fogs up your eyeglasses and for a moment you
can't see anything. Then you proceed slowly to join others, wait for your turn,
order a bracing hot drink at the counter and chat briefly with the chirpy girl,
a student herself, about how bad the weather is, how much worse the east
part of the country is having it, therefore we should be thankful but of course
not gloating, etc."

It suddenly hit me what we were doing was similar. We got up in the morning, ate
nothing, finished a long hike toward noon, and next we were about to have a BBQ
to celebrate the national holiday.

It was all about the contrast, the exertion and relaxation, the yin and the 
yang, with little room for things in-between. Without the cold, coffee wouldn't
have tasted that great. And I shared with Tim what I heard from Taleb:

    The glass is dead. Living things are long volatility. The best way to verify
    if you are alive is by checking if you like variations. Remember that food
    would not have a taste if it weren't for hunger, results are meaningless
    without effort, joy without sadness, convictions without uncertainty, and an
    ethical life isn't so when stripped of personal risks.