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周末一笑: 我已習慣了(轉載)

(2016-06-10 17:22:23) 下一個

1 我已習慣了/I'm used to it

As a hair stylist in a salon, I was giving a client a shampoo. The hose I was using to rinse his hair slipped out of my hand and sprayed him right in the face.

I couldn't apologize enough, but he was nice about the mishap.” That's okay，” he said. “I'm a plumber. I'm used to it. "

作為一個發廊的發型師，一次當我正給一位顧客用香波時，我手中用來洗頭的水管從我手裏滑了出去，水正噴在了那位顧客的臉上。

我怎麽道歉都覺得不夠，而那位顧客對這次閃失卻很寬容。他說:“沒關係，我是個水暖工，這種事我已經習慣了。”

2 妻子的欲望/Wife's desire

A woman and her husband were out shopping when she realized that she needed to purchase some hair color for her graying hair.

"When are you going to stop buying that expensive stuff, “complained the husband. "and let your hair go gray like Barbara Bush?"

"The day that you're inaugurated," the wife replied.

一位女士在與他的丈夫購物時，她意識到她該為她變灰白的頭發買些染發劑了。

“你什麽時候才能停止買那些昂貴的東西,”她丈夫抱怨說: “讓你的頭發自然變白就像芭芭拉.布什(總統夫人)那樣?”

“在你宣誓就職的那一天。”妻子說。

3 經驗/Experience

The manager of a fast-food franchise was approached by a teenager looking for a job. "Have you had any experience with fast food?" the manager asked.

The young man paused for a moment. “Well,” he replied,“ I’ve eaten a lot of it.”

一位少年找到一家快餐連鎖店的經理要找工作，經理問他:“你有在快餐店工作的經驗嗎?"

年輕人想了想說:“這麽說吧，我吃過很多快餐。”

4 再嫩一點兒!/More rare!

Like most colleges, the food at St. Mary's College of Maryland scores low marks for both quality and variety. One exception is our annual steak-and-shrimp night; but even this can’t escape the critics.

"This steak could be a little more rare, " I overheard a fellow student say.

"Pipe down," whispered her companion. "Once a year is rare enough!”

像大多數學院一樣，馬裏蘭的聖·瑪麗學院的夥食無論從花樣上，還是從質量上評分都很低。唯一的例外是我們每年的牛排大蝦之夜。但即使這次也難逃批評。我無意中聽到一個學生說:“這塊牛排應燒得再嫩一點兒。”

她的同伴低聲說:“小聲點兒，一年一次就夠稀有的了。” (注:英語中，嫩和稀有都是rare。)

5 給予與提取/Give and take

My friend's preparations for a visit from her children included a trip to the bank. Waiting in line at the teller's window, she lamented to the middle-aged man behind her, "My children are in their 20's，and I'm still giving them money. When does it end?"

"I'm not sure, "the man replied while glancing uncomfortably at a paper in his hand, "but I’m not the one to ask. I’m here to deposit a check my mother gave me."

我的朋友為其子女的光臨做一些準備包括去一趟銀行。當她在出納員窗口排隊等候時，她對她身後的一位中年男子訴苦:“我的孩子們都20多歲了，可我仍然得給他們錢。這種事什麽時候才算完呢?”

“我不能確定。”那位男子邊回答邊不安地看著手裏拿的那張紙。“我不是你該問的人，我到這兒是來存我媽媽給我的支票的。”

6 隻是提醒而已!/It's a reminder

Trying to cut down on expenses, I decided to bring a sack lunch to work. Unfortunately, I kept forgetting my sandwiches in my morning rush. One night I left myself a note near the front door.

Next morning, I spotted the message and went to the refrigerator, but my lunch wasn't there. I retraced my steps and took a closer look at the note. Underneath "Don't forget your lunch" my roommate had scrawled, "Thanks!”

為了減少開支，我決定自帶袋裝午餐去上班。不幸的是，在早上的忙亂中我總是忘了帶三明治。一天晚上，我在前門附近給自己貼了個紙條。

第二天早上，我看見了條子，來到了冰箱前，卻發現我的午飯不見了。我順著原路，到那張紙條前仔細一看，在“不要忘記你的午飯”的下麵，我的室友潦草地寫著“謝謝”。

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