翻譯2
(2015-04-19 21:30:08)
下一個
我想你一定可以感覺得到,當一個人在夜晚的時候,孤零零地站在浩瀚無垠的沙漠上仰望著天上那一輪清澈的月亮時,那種感覺是多麽的孤獨。可是你覺不覺得當你站在喧嘩的人群中卻茫然不知所措的時候,那種感覺會更加的孤獨呢?這種孤獨真的是痛徹心扉。
I think that you would be easy to feel that how loneliness when you was standing at vast expanse of desert and looking up to the moon on night by yourself. But do you feel when you are standing into the noisy crowd and at a loss what to do , the feeling of loneliness would getting stronger? That feeling used to give me lot's of complex painful.
我至今也無法猜測媽媽是懷著一種怎樣的心情把我送入學校的。7歲那年,我跟同齡的孩子一樣,穿著好看的衣服,背著漂亮的新書包,心中歡快的唱著:小鳥在前麵帶路,風兒吹向我們,我們像小鳥一樣,來到花園裏,來到草地上。。。對很少走出家門的我來說,心情更是歡快的不可言說。
Even now, I stil could not guess that what was a kind of mood with my mother had sent to me to school when I was seven. That year, I was wearing beautiful clothes and carrying a new back bag, the cheerful singing in my heart like same age chirdren.
媽媽每天小心翼翼的把我送進教室之後,總是要站在門外跟老師叮嚀幾句。在轉身離開的時候,也總是不忘給我一個溫暖的笑。
Every day, My mother had sent to me into classrom and then had standed out side of the class door to talk to my teacher some few words, after that she had never forgotten to give me a warm smilling when she left.
於是從老師那裏我得到了別的同學得不到的待遇:學校打掃衛生的時候,老師會搬一張椅子在走廊盡頭,要我安靜的坐在那裏;課間廣播體操的時候,我可以留在教室裏做自己喜歡的事情;體育課時,我則被老師安置在操場上最溫暖的地方一動不動的坐著。。。
So by the way, I had gotten a diffrent treatment with other students from my teachers.- Teacher put a chair on the end of the corridor and let me to sit when other students were doing clean our classrom. I could stay at the room when others were going out side to do excise at break time. When we learn sport outside in sport class, I had always placed a warmest place by teacher to sit and to see other students how happy they were playing and running at front of me.
我就那樣一個人靜靜的托著下巴,無聲無息的坐在陽光的角落裏,看著同學們在我麵前開心的跑、歡快的笑。就那樣孤獨的坐在長滿青草、開滿鮮花的操場上看著草長鶯飛、花開花謝;聆聽著明媚的風在我耳邊竊竊的低語;細數著樹葉一片一片地紛亂下墜,然後掉在我腳邊悄悄的死去;懷抱著寂寞等待著季節年複一年的走過我兒時的青青草場。
久而久之,每個同學都開始睜大眼睛用好奇的目光上上下下的打量著那個麵色蒼白,瘦弱無骨的我,像是發現了一個新奇的怪物。每個老師看到我也都是微笑的搖搖頭,雖然那是很微妙的動作, 卻足以令我萬分難過了。
於是,我開始嚐試著讓每一個同學都接受我:我把好吃的糖果分給他們吃,要知道這些糖果連我的姐姐弟弟都吃不到的;我把聞起來香香的橡皮給他們用;還討好得幫那些學習不好的同學寫作業。。。可是後來我發現我根本無法做到堅持,因為他們並沒有因此對我露出絲毫的微笑。所以,當我做到一半的時候我就發現自己已經累得精疲力盡了。從那時起,我開始學會了隱藏溫柔。。。
想到這些我就想掉眼淚。
我是多早就學會了一個人寂寞啊,我的臉上越來越多的呈現出不敢讓人接近的冷漠。 我多希望會有明媚的風兒向我吹過來,將我身體的每個縫隙都填滿溫暖的味道,融盡我所有開始結冰的骨骼。
這種不可名狀的孤獨,注定搖晃著我的一生,並在我的生命裏站成了無法消磨的永恒。