willow

很小的時候，就聽人說過：世界上最寂寞的植物就是柳，在明媚的春天裏，它抱著滿懷白色的心事，抖落在空氣裏，隨著風飄，一點一點寂寞了一地的白。

我想也許我的前世是一棵柳，站在山崗上，在風中開出大團大團白色的寂寞。

我天生就是喜歡寂寞的人，但隻是在晚上我才寂寞。白天的時候我是個快樂，明朗的人。我聽到大人們常常教育我的話就是：你不要瘋得像個小孩子。

大多數人總是認為我是個沒有憂傷的孩子，手中握著大把大把的幸福，甚至有時候不懂得珍惜而肆意的揮霍。他們看到的是我明朗的一麵。當然，我也希望自己明朗的一麵被人看到，畢竟快樂是可以共享的東西，而憂傷則不。有時那個鑲嵌在心裏的不可名狀的灼熱，不可言說。

When I was a kid I heard people saying that the loneliest plant in the whole world is willow. In a sunny Spring, abreasting its white thought, shedding off its dry flowers in the air and let them flown. And finally the ground becomes white and lonliness with the fallen flowers.

I think perhaps my past life is a wilow standing on a hill. And the wilow would emit white clouds of loneliness.

I was born to enjoy loneliness. However, I get the loneliness during nights only, since am a happy person during the day. That's why sometimes my parents would say "stop being a wild boy".

Most people would say I am care-free with abundance of happiness which I squander at will.  They see me in my daytime.

我一直認為能說出來的就不叫憂傷了。有時候我試圖告訴別人我內心的恐慌，可往往是張開口卻不知道怎麽講，最後，隻好擺擺手，說句“你不明白”收場。

有些東西注定要單槍匹馬的，不能說，一說就錯，然後還要用語言去糾正因語言犯下的錯誤，太麻煩。於是，我學會了安靜。算算我的八字，看看我的掌紋，我想我的寂寞是在劫難逃的，所以，我隻好心安理得的來享受它了。

我總是對一些非主流電影中的人物有著細膩得驚人的感觸，就像細小的衝擊對含羞草的都是雷霆萬鈞一樣。 我看過很多不為人知的電影，那些電影中的人物總是寂寞的。我清楚地記得有個女人每晚都給自己買一束玫瑰，第二天早上看也不看就扔掉了。直到有一天終於有人送了她一束玫瑰，當她第二天早上看到玫瑰凋謝卻無能為力時，她是怎樣留了一地的淚。

我看書也很極端，要麽如許佳的安靜恰淡，要麽就是如蘇童的冷豔張揚。或許我天生就是一個極端的人吧。如果碰到一本我喜歡的書，我會毫無怨言的捧著它一直的看，直看到日月無光看到山無棱天地合。

我還是個非常喜歡破壞溫馨氛圍的人，我常常會因為聽聽歌，看看書，寫寫字就哭了，很冰冷的眼淚，所以，周圍的人經常會被我弄得不知所措。我也不喜歡自己這樣悶悶的，心事重重，一副不開心的樣子，可是，沒辦法，我傷心的時候，控製不住。

你一定聽到過這樣一個寓言故事，如果一隻野獸受了傷，它可以找一個山洞躲起來一邊舔舐自己的傷口，一邊咬牙堅持，可是一旦被噓寒問暖，它就受不了了。

如果一個小孩摔倒了，沒人看見，他會自己站起來拍拍膝蓋。可是一旦心疼自己的人來了，眼淚就會大顆大顆地掉下來。

我每天都在笑，一直笑到每個人都羨慕的對我說，你看你多快樂。

直到有一天，一個人對我說：你不快樂。於是，我的眼淚就掉下來了。

好多時候，我也分不清自己到底是一個陽光中樂天的人，還是一個習慣在黑夜裏疼痛的人。忘了在哪裏看到過這樣一句話：沒有歡笑的青春不完整，沒有眼淚的青春更是一種殘缺。既然注定了要笑要哭要憂傷，那麽就讓它來吧，我願隨風歌唱。

誰的寂寞   衣我華裳   誰的華裳   蓋住我傷痕累累的肩膀

誰的明月   照我黑色的鬆崗   誰的孤獨   挫疼山間呼嘯的滄江

那是誰家寂寞的小孩    頭插茱萸   夜夜夜夜   縱情歌唱 

如此遼闊   如此蒼涼

When I was a child I heard people saying that loneliest plant in the whole world is willow.

 beautiful in the spring, holding it full of white in

mind, Doula in the air, with Fengpiao, 1.1 points a

lonely The white.

I think perhaps my past life is an Liu, from the hills,

in the wind and big corporations out of the big

corporations and white lonely.

I was born like lonely people, but only at night

before I lonely. During the day when I was a

happy, the people of uncertainty. I heard the

people of my education so often is: Do not crazy

like a child.

Most people always think that I was not sad child,

holding the hands of huge lot of happiness, and

even sometimes do not know how to cherish and

wanton spending. They see a side of my

uncertainty. Of course, I also hope that their side

was clear to see, after all, is happy to share

things, but not sad. Sometimes embedded in his

heart that the Bukemingzhuang the hot,

Bukeyanshuo.

I have always thought that's not to say it is a sad.

Sometimes I try to tell others about my inner panic,

often do not know how open-speaking, the final

and had to Bai Baishou, say, "you do not

understand the" end.

Some things are doomed to single-handedly, and

can not be said that on the wrong one, and then to

use language to correct the mistakes committed

by language, too troublesome. So, I learned how

to quiet. Suansuan my character, I look at the

palm prints, I think I can not escape the loneliness

in the robbery, so I have a clear conscience to

enjoy it.

I always some non-mainstream films in the

staggering figure of a delicate feeling, like a small

impact on Mimosa Leitingwanjun are the same. I

have read a lot of unknown films, the characters in

those films are always lonely. I clearly remember

that a woman gave themselves every night to buy

a bouquet of roses, on the next morning

Kanyebukan discarded. Until finally one day

someone sent her a bouquet of roses, the next

morning when she saw Rose withers is

powerless, what she is a stay of tears.

I read very extreme, either as a quiet and short Jia

Xu, either as Su Tong is the Lengyan publicity.

Perhaps I was born an extreme one bar. If I like to

encounter a book, I will Haowuyuanyan the

Pengzhao it has been speaking, the straight-to

see the sun and the moon matt see a world

without edge.

I still like to destroy a very warm atmosphere of

the people, I often because Tingting Ge, look at

the books, write and write Jiuku, very cold tears,

so often the people around me will be made at a

loss. I do not like themselves Men Men,

Xinshichongchong, an unhappy way, but no way, I

feel sad when Kongzhibuzhu.

You have heard of such a fable, if an animal was

injured, it can find a cave hiding Shi side licking

their wounds, while Yaoya adhere to, but once

they are being, it can not stand by.

If a child falls, Moren Kan see that he would stand

up and patted his knee. But once pained by their

own people, tears will be big stars and big stars

fall.

I laugh every day, every laugh has been the envy

of people said to me, you see you more happy.

Until one day, one person said to me: you are not

happy. Thus, my tears fell on the.

Many times, I also own confusion in the end is a

Lotte in the sun, or a habit of darkness, the pain of

people. Forget where seen this sentence: There

is no laughter of youth are incomplete, no more

tears of youth is a deterioration. Since the need to

laugh Yaoku doomed to sadness, then let it

come, I would like to wind singing.

Who's lonely clothing, I Sang Sang, who is the

cover I witness on the shoulder

Who the moon as far as I Songgang who is black

pain of loneliness down the mountain roar

Cangjiang

Who is the lonely child into the first song released

onto Zhuyu Yeyeyeye

So that the vast desolation