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Wives and Husbands

(2007-05-28 07:32:25) 下一個
Wife: Honey..... What are You Looking for ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing...?? You've been reading our marriage certificate
for an hour ??
Husband : I was just looking for the expiration date.

                 **********

Q - What is the Difference Between Mother & Wife ?
A - One Woman Brings you into this world crying... & the other
ensures you continue to do so.
                **********
Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choi ces?
Wife : Yes and no.

                **********
Wife: You always carry my photo in your briefcase to the office.   Why?
Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other
problem can there be greater than this one?"
                 **********

Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries,
troubles and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries
or troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.
                 **********
Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But Mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
               **********

A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"

               **********
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a
millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: " A Billionaire"

             **********

Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever.
The guy replies: Thanks for the warning .

            **********

A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me my pretty
face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense
of humor."
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jerryus 回複 悄悄話 哈哈,沒想到北美農民農忙之餘生活還匝末有樂趣,應該把北美農民邀請回中國給我們的農民兄弟傳經送寶....
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