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The Long Road Home

(2007-05-02 14:06:41) 下一個



The Long Road Home Author: Lia Gay

     I find myself packing again.  This time is different; this isn't the same nostalgic trip down memory lane as when I packed before college.  So now that I'm packed, I have a minute to examine my emotions about my first trip home.  I'm excited.  My best friend, Matt, picks me up. My expectations are that I am going home to what I left: my parents, home-cooked meals, friends with whom I shared distinctive bonds and my long-distance boyfriend, whom I have been dying to see.  I am happy at college, but a trip home, to my family and friends, sounds like just the thing I need to prepare me for the prefinals crunch.

     A few hours later, I'm back at the airport, waiting for my boyfriend's arrival home.  He steps off the plane.  We drive over to see my dad. I ask to see my room, expecting to find my shrine, my old pompoms, prom pictures, candid photos of friends and dolls scattered about.  To my surprise, everything is gone; there's not even a trace I had ever lived in the room. It's as if the second I became a "college" student, I had ceased to exist.

     I run into two of my best friends from high school; we stare blankly at each other.  We ask the simple questions and give simple, abrupt answers.  It's as if we have nothing to say to each other.  I wonder how things have changed so much in such a small amount of time.  We used to laugh and promise that no matter how far away we were, our love for each other would never change.  Their interests don't interest me anymore, and I find myself unable to relate my life to theirs.

     I had been so excited to come home, but now I just look at it all and wonder: Is it me? Why hadn't the world stood still here while I was gone?  My room isn't the same, my friends and I don't share the same bond.

     I get back to school feeling half-fulfilled, but not disappointed.  I sit up in my bed in my dorm room, surrounded by my pictures, dolls and mementos.  As I wonder what has happened, I realize that I can't expect the world to stand still and move forward at the same time.  I can't change and expect that things at home will stay the same.  I have to find comfort in what has changed and what is new; keep the memories, but live in the present. I have come home accepting the changes, not only in my surroundings, but most of all in me.







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林貝卡 回複 悄悄話 Onlooker77,

My pleasure.

Have a nice weekend,

Rebecca
Onlooker77 回複 悄悄話 This article made me feel nostalgic. About "change" part, I think the same way. Thank you, rebecca!
林貝卡 回複 悄悄話 靜謐海灣,

That is my favorite part, too.

Good night.
靜謐海灣 回複 悄悄話 "I can't expect the world to stand still and move forward at the same time.

I can't change and expect that things at home will stay the same.

I have to find comfort in what has changed and what is new; keep the memories, but live in the present."

Like this article. We are changing, hometown is changing, friends are changing eventhough it make us feel a bit sad.

Read and listened "Lover" again. It is my favorite as well.
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