正文
[I like this article after reading it on wenxuecity homepage. People may nurture these skills unconciously. However, sometimes, they might forget or ignore. Posted here to remind me.]
眾所周知，教育係統並不能教導我們孩子基本的閱讀、寫作、算術與科學的技能，而這些恰恰是他們在即將來臨的高科技時代獲得競爭優勢的必備技能（至少，這是一種普遍看法，在此我們不展開討論）。
然而，生活中所需的知識遠遠超出學校的基本科目，除非你有幸碰見一位打破常規的老師，否則，你的小孩將無法學到生活中所至關重要的事情。
回顧你的切身經驗，當你高中畢業時，你了解生活中的所需知識麽？更不用說如何取得成功了。幸運的話，你也許知道如何閱讀，並且有一些基本的曆史和數學技能，甚至你還可能擁有良好的學習習慣，這將使你在大學中受益。
但是，你真的準備好進入現實生活了麽？也許未必，除非你的父母已經為你準備好一切。事實上，我們大部分人的早期成年生活都是一團糟，因為我們不了解所需的技能，而我們正在承受相應的後果。
你也許會說，這是生活的一部分——從經驗教訓中學習。但仍可能在你的孩子獨立生活之前，讓他準備得充分一些。如果我們無法讓學校教授那些技能，就讓我們自己來負責吧。
以下是一張基本課程表，孩子在邁入成年生活之前都應該掌握它。也許你認為還有其他技能需要加入其中，但至少這是一個起步要求。
如何教導這些事情：這些課程無法通過講課和課本來掌握，隻能通過實例、言傳身教來教導，並且要允許小孩獨自去嚐試（剛剛開始可以在監督下進行）。一旦你進行言傳身教，並且監督他們嚐試幾次後，就應該給予你的孩子信任，讓他自己去完成，從自身的錯誤中學習；另外要不時和你的孩子討論他的學習成果。
眾所周知，教育係統並不能教導我們孩子基本的閱讀、寫作、算術與科學的技能，而這些恰恰是他們在即將來臨的高科技時代獲得競爭優勢的必備技能（至少，這是一種普遍看法，在此我們不展開討論）。
然而，生活中所需的知識遠遠超出學校的基本科目，除非你有幸碰見一位打破常規的老師，否則，你的小孩將無法學到生活中所至關重要的事情。
回顧你的切身經驗，當你高中畢業時，你了解生活中的所需知識麽？更不用說如何取得成功了。幸運的話，你也許知道如何閱讀，並且有一些基本的曆史和數學技能，甚至你還可能擁有良好的學習習慣，這將使你在大學中受益。
但是，你真的準備好進入現實生活了麽？也許未必，除非你的父母已經為你準備好一切。事實上，我們大部分人的早期成年生活都是一團糟，因為我們不了解所需的技能，而我們正在承受相應的後果。
你也許會說，這是生活的一部分——從經驗教訓中學習。但仍可能在你的孩子獨立生活之前，讓他準備得充分一些。如果我們無法讓學校教授那些技能，就讓我們自己來負責吧。
以下是一張基本課程表，孩子在邁入成年生活之前都應該掌握它。也許你認為還有其他技能需要加入其中，但至少這是一個起步要求。
如何教導這些事情：這些課程無法通過講課和課本來掌握，隻能通過實例、言傳身教來教導，並且要允許小孩獨自去嚐試（剛剛開始可以在監督下進行）。一旦你進行言傳身教，並且監督他們嚐試幾次後，就應該給予你的孩子信任，讓他自己去完成，從自身的錯誤中學習；另外要不時和你的孩子討論他的學習成果。
財務
- 儲蓄：量入為出是一句簡樸的格言，然而隻有極少數的青年人理解並知道如何遵循它。從小就讓孩子將他的一部分零花錢存入銀行，教導他如何設定儲蓄目標，如何達成該目標，然後便可購買他想要的物品。
- 預算：許多成年人害怕做預算，並為此飽受折磨，這是因為我們缺乏做預算所需的知識和技能。教導孩子簡單的預算技能，以及相關的知識，讓他們成年後不在麵臨預算的煩惱。你可以等到孩子十幾歲再教他們這些知識，這是一個很好的機會來展示為什麽他們需要了解數學基礎知識。
- 支付：讓孩子們支付賬單，並確保他們按時支付，不論是在線支付還是實地完成。讓他們學習如何寫支票，包括紙張支票和在線支票；確保不會延誤賬單——可以通過馬上支付或者自動支付來完成。
- 投資：什麽是投資，為什麽必須進行投資？你是如何進行投資的，有哪些不同的投資手段？你是如何研究投資項目？複利如何發揮時間威力。這些都是和你孩子交談的極佳話題。
- 節省：這是從小就應該教會他們的事情。如何去貨比三家，比較不同的價格和質量，對物品重複利用、減少浪費，在家煮食而不過多在外就餐，控製購物衝動。當我們外出瘋狂購物，即便是聖誕節前，也會為孩子樹立了一個壞榜樣。
- 債務：許多成年人都麵臨債務問題。要教導孩子借貸的責任，如何避免不必要的債務，如何避免過多舉債，如何可靠地使用信用卡。
- 退休：努力工作到退休年齡，還是“迷你退休”（即工作一段時間，享受一段時間），哪種更好？這是見仁見智的問題，但是你的孩子應該知曉有這些選擇，它們的利弊所在，以及如何具體實施。告訴你的孩子年輕時候就開始投資的重要性，複利所帶來的巨大差別，以及如何讓投資自動化。
- 慈善：告訴孩子從事慈善的重要性，以及如何養成做慈善的習慣。這不僅僅是一個財務問題，也是一種社會活動。你應示範如何將時間與精力投入到慈善活動中。
思考
- 批判性思維：這是學校沒有教導的最重要的技能之一。目前，我們被馴化成機器人，聽從老師而不做提問，聽從教導而不動腦筋，成為不敢有異議的老實員工。如果你是一位雇主，也許你會喜歡這樣的員工；如果你是一名政客，你也許希望你的市民就是如此。但是你希望自己的孩子成為這樣的人麽——不問是非，幼稚無知的市民/雇員 /學生？如果不是的話，馬上開始培養他們提出“為什麽”的習慣，學習如何找尋答案，如何去質疑權威——沒有放之四海而皆準的永恒答案。對話是學習這種技能的良好途徑。
- 閱讀：當然，學校有教導我們進行閱讀，但學校的教育方式往往讓人厭倦閱讀。帶著你的孩子遊覽書中那天馬行空的想象世界，指導他們通過互聯網找到相應的信息，以及如何評價閱讀材料的可信度、邏輯性和真實性。
成功
- 積極：上麵提到批判性思維是一項重要的技能，而對生活有著積極的態度也是相當重要的。當然，事情可能會變得很糟，但是塞翁失馬焉知非福，所以應該停止抱怨，尋求解決方案，最重要的是，要堅信自我，擺脫負麵思維。
- 動力：要知道達到目標的關鍵不是紀律，而是動力。如何采用不同的方式激勵自己，並體驗完成目標的喜悅心情。一開始，先設定一些較小的，容易達到的目標，從而逐漸鍛煉這種技巧。
- 拖拉：這是成年人的常見毛病（甚至小孩也如此）。我同意在某些時候，人們應當悠遊度日，享受慵懶的時光。但是，當我們必須做某些事情的時候，怎麽保證我們能夠按時完成呢？教導孩子要吸取拖拉的教訓，找出他們拖拉的習慣，並且研究如何克服它。
- 激情：成功的一個重要途徑，就是找到使你激情洋溢的事物，並全情投入。你的孩子還無法在年幼時找到這個答案，但是你應該指導他們發現自己的激情所在並且對其不懈追求，讓他們了解這樣做的重要性。
社交
- 合作：從小，我們就被灌輸競爭主義，這也是成人世界的寫照。結果呢，卑鄙陷害、互相拆台、忿恨抱怨充滿了我們的生活。相反，請教導你的孩子，人們是可以達到共贏的，幫助他人成功，將使你自己更加成功。告訴孩子結交朋友勝於製造敵人，在競爭之前先學會團隊合作。
- 同情：這是被學校完全忽略的主題。事實上，孩子在學校學到的往往不是同情並幫助他人，而是增加別人的難處。應該教導孩子設身處地地了解別人，並去幫助別人擺脫痛楚。
- 愛心：愛心和同情是雙胞胎，同情著重於減輕別人的痛楚，而愛心則是希望他人幸福。這兩者都是至關重要的。
- 傾聽：我們的孩子在學校學習到如何傾聽了麽？或者如何與人交談麽？也許這就是為什麽許多成年人都不具備傾聽這個重要能力的原因。要孩子學會如何真正地傾聽他人，從而能夠理解和感覺他人。
- 交談：交談與傾聽是緊密關聯的，而學校並沒有教導孩子交談的藝術。事實上，學校告訴孩子在大部分情況下交談是不對的，然而我們往往需要的是互相交談，而不是教導。這是非常重要的社交技巧，從小就應該在家裏實踐。請學會與你的孩子交談，而不是隻要他聽話。
實務
- 汽車：告訴孩子為什麽我們需要汽車（並不是為了耍酷），如何買到合適的汽車，如何保養汽車。了解發動機的工作原理，哪些地方會發生損壞，又該如何修理。這是男孩女孩都應該學習的技能（這是顯而易見的，但我還是要強調）。
- 家務：如何保養和維修房屋的各種物件，包括管道、電器、冷暖設備、油漆、蓋屋頂、剪草等等。掌握進行基礎維護的工作和方法，並且知道什麽時候該叫專家來幫忙。
- 清潔：太多的成年人沒有學會如何送洗衣物，如何清潔房間，如何使房子井井有條，如何進行每周、每月的大掃除。不要隻是讓孩子做這做那，而要他們真的學會這些事情。
- 組織：讓孩子學會如何擺放文件，如何讓事物各就各位，如何建立待辦事宜，如何建立工作流程，以及如何集中精力在重要工作上。
快樂
- 著眼現在：基於某些原因，我們小時候從未學到這個重要的技能。事實上，我們越年輕，就越能享受現在。當我們慢慢長大，開始擔心將來，回顧過去，而“現在”則離我們而去。“活在現在”的技巧對我們是大有幫助的。
- 享受生活：孩子們都在享受生活，但隻有一部分意識到這個技能的重要性，並且應該如何進行。即使對於成年人，享受生活的技能依然大有益處，為你的孩子做好榜樣，他們自然會模仿你的。
- 尋找目標：擁有一個目標對於生活而是是極為重要的，無論是崇高的宗教目標，或者是為了讓家庭幸福，又或者是你的職業目標。讓孩子認識到目標的重要性，並且如何為自己找到目標。
- 發展親密關係：教導這個技能的最佳方式，就是和你的孩子建立親密關係，並且以你和配偶（或其他適當的人）為範例。教會他們發展這種關係的技能，討論它的重要性，並且學習如何克服衝突。生活中總會出現不和，但是通過交流、理解和妥協，我們就能言歸於好。
Adults do not have every aspect not to mention kids.
I like several items including thinking, finance, success and happiness.
Welcome back. Thanks for the English version. I will learn it seriously. :))
27 Skills Your Child Needs to Know
Source: Finance & Family Day
What follows is a basic curriculum in life that a child should know before reaching adulthood. There will probably be other skills you can add to this list, but at least it’s a starting point.
A note on how to teach these things: These subjects should be taught by setting examples, by conversation, by showing, and by allowing the child (or teenager) to do these things on their own (with supervision at first). Once you’ve talked about the skill, showed your child how to do it, and let them do it under supervision a few times, give your child the trust to do it on his own, and to learn from his own mistakes. Check back every now and then to talk about what he’s learned.
Financial
Saving. Spend less than you earn. It’s such a simple maxim, and yet very few young adults understand it or know how to follow it. Teach your child from a young age to put part of money he receives or earns in the bank. Teach him how to set a savings goal, and save for it, and then purchase whatever it is he was saving for.
Budgeting. Many of us dread this task as adults, and suffer because of it, because we lack the understanding and skills necessary to make budgeting a breeze. Teach them simple budgeting skills, and what’s involved, and they won’t have problems as an adult. You could wait until teenage years to do something like this — but it’s a good thing because this shows them why basic math is necessary.
Paying bills. Give them bills to pay and have them pay it on time, online or in the real world. Learn how to write a check, paper and online, and how to make sure that you’re never late with bills again — either pay them immediately or automatically.
Investing. What is investing and why is it necessary? How do you do it and what are different ways of doing it? How do you research an investment? How does it compound over time? This is a good conversation to have with your teen.
Frugality. This is something to teach them from an early age. How to shop around to get a good deal, to compare between products of different prices and quality, to make things last and not waste, to cook at home instead of eating out too much, to control impulse buying. When we go out and do a shopping spree, including before Christmas, we are teaching them just the opposite.
Credit. This is a major problem for many adults. Teach them the responsible use for credit, and how to avoid it when it’s not necessary, and how to avoid getting into too much debt, and how to use a credit card responsibly.
Retirement. Is it better to work hard and retire or to take mini-retirements throughout life? That’s a personal question, but your child should be aware of the options and the pros and cons of each, and how to do each. Why it’s important to start investing in retirement when you’re young, and how much of a difference that can make through compound interest. How to do it automatically.
Charity. Why this is an important use of your money, and how to make it a regular habit. This should be not only a financial issue, but a social one. Show them how to volunteer their time and effort as well.
Thinking
Critical thinking. Introduce the habit of questioning why? And the skill of find out the answer. And how to question authority — there is no one right answer. Conversation is a good way to accomplish this skill.
Reading. Show your child the wonderful imaginative worlds there are out there. And show them how to find out about stuff in the world through the Internet, and how to evaluate what they read for credibility, logic, factualness.
Success
Positive thinking. While critical thinking is an important skill, it’s also important to have a positive outlook on life. Sure, things may be screwed up, but they can be changed for the better. Find solutions instead of complaints. And most of all, learn to believe in yourself, and to block out negative self-thinking.
Motivation. Learn that discipline isn’t the key to achieving a goal, but motivation. How to motivate yourself, different strategies, and how great it feels to achieve a goal. Start them with small, easily achievable goals, and let them develop this skill.
Procrastination. It’s a problem we all deal with as adults (and even as kids). Now, I believe that there should be a time for goofing off, being lazy, and having fun. But when there’s something to do that we really need to do, how do we get ourselves to do it? Learn the reasons behind procrastination, and how to address them. How to beat procrastination.
Passion. One of the most important ways to be successful is to find something you’re passionate about, and do that for a living. Your child won’t know the answer at a young age, but you should show her how to find her passion and how to pursue it, and why that’s important.
Social
Anti-competition. As kids, we’re taught how to be competitive. In the adult world, that’s how we behave. And that results in back-stabbing, undercutting, feelings of resentment, and other life-affirming things like that. Instead, teach your child how there is room for many people to be successful, and how you’re more likely to be successful if you help others to be successful, and how they’ll help you in return. Learn that making friends and allies is better than making enemies, and how to do that. Learn cooperation and teamwork before competition.
Compassion. Learn to put yourself in the shoes of others, to try to understand them, and to help them end their suffering.
Love. Compassion’s twin brother, love differs only in that instead of wanting to ease the suffering of others, you want their happiness. Both are crucial.
Listening. Learn how to truly listen to someone, to understand what they’re saying, to empathize.
Conversation. Goes hand-in-hand with listening. A conversation is what is needed, not a lecture. This is an extremely important social skill that should start in the home. Learn to converse with your child instead of talk at him.
Practical
Auto. Why cars are needed (no, not to look cool), how to buy a practical car, how to take care of it. How the engine works, what might break down, and how it’s fixed. Should be taught to both boys and girls (that should be obvious, but I had to say it).
Household. How to fix things around the house and keep things maintained. Plumbing, electricity, heating and cooling, painting, roofing, lawn, all that good stuff. The tools and skills necessary to do just the basic maintenance and repairs. And how to know when to call a professional.
Cleaning. Too many adults grow up without knowing how to do laundry, to clean a house properly, to keep the house clean and uncluttered, to have a weekly and monthly cleaning routine. Teach your child all these things instead of just telling her what to do.
Organization. How to keep paperwork organized, how to keep things in their place, to to keep a to-do list, how to set routines, how to focus on the important tasks.
Happiness
Be present. For some reason, this extremely important skill is never taught to us when we’re kids. In truth, the younger we are, the more natural this skill is. As we get older, we start thinking about the future and the past, and the present seems to slip away from us. Some skills for living in the present would go a long way.
Enjoy life. Kids don’t have much of a problem with this, but some awareness of its importance and how to do it, even as an adult, would be helpful. Set a good example of this, and your kids will follow.
Find purpose. Whether this is a higher religious purpose, or the purpose of making your family happy, or the purpose of finding your calling, having a purpose in life is extremely important. Teach your children the importance of this and show how to do it yourself.
Develop intimate relationships. The best way to teach this is to develop an intimate relationship with your child, and model it with your spouse or other significant other (within appropriateness). Teach them the skills for developing these types of relationships, talk about the importance of it, and how to get through the bumpy parts as well. There are bad times in every relationship, but with the right skills of communication, empathy and compromise, they can get through them.