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1．Which woman? 哪一位女人？
One evening l drove my husband's car to the shopping mall. On my return, I noticed how dusty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a bit. When I finally entered the house, I called out. "The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."
一天晚上我開著丈夫的車去購物，回來後發現車身沾滿灰塵，於是擦洗了一陣。最後我走進屋裏時大聲喊道：“世界上最愛你的女人剛擦洗了你的車燈和擋風玻璃。”
My husband looked up and said, "Mom's here?"
我丈夫抬頭看了看，說，“媽媽來了？”
2．Get the kid讓小的幹吧
A bit of advice for those about to retire. lf you are only 65, never move to ansrUrement community. Everybody else is in their 71s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell, "Get the kid．"
這裏想對將要退休的人提一點忠告。如果你隻有65歲的話，千萬別進退休社區。因為那裏的人都七八十歲或者八九十歲了。每當要搬東西，抬東西或者裝東西時，他們會喊，“讓小的幹吧。”
3．Honey, We've got a little car trouble 咱們的車出了點“小問題”
A wife said to her husband, "We've got trouble with the car; it has water in the carburetor." The husband exclaimed, "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous!" The wife repeated, "I tell you, the car has water in the carburetor. The husband said, "But you don't even know what a carburetor is Where's the car? And the wife replied, "In the swimming pool"
有位太太對先生說：“我們的車子出問題了！化油器進水了。”先生說：“化油器進水？真是荒謬！”太太重複道：“我告訴你，車子的化油墨進水了！”先生說：“可是你連化油器是什麽都搞不清楚啊l車子在哪兒？”太太回答：“遊泳池裏！”
4．The same service 同樣的服務
A man who had been married for ten years was consulting a marriage counselor.
有位結婚十年的男人，正向婚姻顧問請教。
"When I was first married, I was very happy. l'd come home from a hard day down at the shop, and my little dog would race around barking, and my wife would bring me my slippers. Now everything's changed. When I come home, my dog brings me my slippers, and my wife barks at me."
"新婚時我非常幸福。在市區的商店裏累了一天，回到家裏，小狗圍著我又跑又叫，妻子忙給我拿來拖鞋。現在一切都變了。小狗給我叼來拖鞋，妻子對我又喊又叫。”
"I don't know what you're complaining about, "said the counselor, "You're still getting the same service."
“我不知道你有什麽可抱怨的，”顧問說，“你得到的服務還是同樣的嘛。”
5．Anxious著急
The wife says to the neighbor: “My husband has not returned all the night: I do not know where he went .It really gives me a hang up!"
妻子對鄰居說：“丈夫一晚上都沒回家，也不知道他幹什麽去了，真叫我著急！”
An insider says: "Let it be. Would you know where he went, l dare to say that you would be more anxious."
一個知情人說：“算了，你要知道他幹什麽去了，我敢說你會更著急。
6．A Pledge誓約
Grandpa was celebrating his l00th birthday, and everyone was complimenting him on how well he looked.” I‘ll tell you the secret, "he said. "My wife and I were married seventy-five years ago. On our wedding night we made a pledge that whenever we had a fight, the one who proved wrong would go out and take a walk. I have been in the open air continuously for the past seventy-five years."
爺爺過一百歲生日，大家都祝賀他，說他看上去很健康。"我來告訴你們這裏麵的秘密，"他說.”我和妻子結婚七十五年了。在新婚之夜我們訂了一個誓約，那就是無論我們什麽時候發生爭吵，誰被證明錯了，誰就到外麵去散一圈步，我已經在外麵一待了七十五年了。”
幽夢言簡意賅：）
就喜歡桐兒笑：）
問好含嫣！ 可憐的妻子，自以為最愛~
含嫣，新周快樂！
老公沒錯，哪一位女人最好，當然是媽媽最好。
謝謝燕燕鼓勵，問好並祝周末快樂！
嗯，離開是非地，走路散散心，養生之道也~
特高興，周末快樂！
哈哈，就是，又想起婆婆和媳婦同時落水，丈夫先救誰的問題了~~~
貝卡，周末快樂！
問好小婷，祝小婷天天快樂！
是啊，點點，有些妻子們自認為深愛丈夫，卻不知道在丈夫心中，母親是第一位的。
點點，周末快樂！
嗯，是，網上的英語幽默，想快樂地學學人家的幽默~~~
丁莊，周末快樂！
絕對有效的健身法！
問好晴！剛上了兩個菜：）
晴，周末快樂！
哈哈，姍姍的評語還合轍押韻頗有詩意，你指望幼兒園的小朋友幫你幹活~~~
姍姍，周末快樂！
問好小和尚妹妹：）
心情不好出去走的確可以讓心情好起來~
小和尚妹妹，周末快樂！
哦，我知道了，等我65歲時，一定搬到幼兒園附近去住，嗬嗬
鬆鬆好，周末快樂~~~
Open air真是對人身體健康有益的喲。：）怪不得都７５年了，太太還很性福地呆在這個婚姻裏麵。
鬆鬆周末快樂～
問好雪花，好象是同樣的服務哎~~~
雪花，周末快樂！
問好花甲老翁，周末快樂！