偶燈斯陋
random thoughts by 偶燈斯陋
正文
［親子之間］Top 10 Tips for Parents
1. 1. 當孩子有話和你說或者有東西要給你看時，立即停下你手中的工作，把注意力放到孩子身上。與孩子作這樣的經常的，盡管比較短的交流，一起欣賞或者作共同愛好的東西或事情是非常重要的。（When your child wants to show you something, stop what you are doing and pay attention to your child. It is important to spend frequent, small amounts of time with your child doing things that you both enjoy.）
2. 2. 給孩子大量的身體的接觸和撫愛。孩子需要大量的你的擁抱，需要與你依偎，需要和你手牽手。與孩子交談，談他喜歡的東西，也與他分享你一天工作中的各種經驗。（Give your child lots of physical affection—children often like hugs, cuddles, and holding hands。 Talk to your child about things he/she is interested in and share aspects of your day with your child.）
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3. 當孩子把事情作的很好時，給孩子大量 具體的讚揚。告訴她：“謝謝你這麽快就按照我提的要求把事情做好了！“ （Give your child lots of descriptive praise when they do something that you would like to see more of, e.g., “Thank you for doing what I asked straight away”.）
3. 當孩子把事情作的很好時，給孩子大量 具體的讚揚。告訴她：“謝謝你這麽快就按照我提的要求把事情做好了！“ （Give your child lots of descriptive praise when they do something that you would like to see more of, e.g., “Thank you for doing what I asked straight away”.）
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4. 孩子在無所事事的時候容易作壞事。所以盡量給孩子提供進行室內和戶外的活動的條件和材料，比如玩橡皮泥，塗色采的顏料和圖片，硬紙板盒子，換裝裝扮的服裝，雜物房等等。（ Children are more likely to misbehave when they are bored so provide lots of engaging indoor and outdoor activities for your child, e.g., playdough, colouring in, cardboard boxes, dress ups, cubby houses, etc.）
4. 孩子在無所事事的時候容易作壞事。所以盡量給孩子提供進行室內和戶外的活動的條件和材料，比如玩橡皮泥，塗色采的顏料和圖片，硬紙板盒子，換裝裝扮的服裝，雜物房等等。（ Children are more likely to misbehave when they are bored so provide lots of engaging indoor and outdoor activities for your child, e.g., playdough, colouring in, cardboard boxes, dress ups, cubby houses, etc.）
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5. 自己以身作則，帶頭學習新技能，給孩子機會也學習這些新技能。比如在家裏夫妻說話時語氣溫和文雅，再要求孩子說話要有禮貌，比如使用“請” 和“謝謝”的禮貌用語。孩子作出的努力要給予認可和讚揚。（Teach your child new skills by first showing the skill yourself, then giving your child opportunities to learn the new skill. For example, speak politely to each other in the home. Then prompt your child to speak politely (e.g., say “please” or “thank you”), and praise your child for their efforts.）
5. 自己以身作則，帶頭學習新技能，給孩子機會也學習這些新技能。比如在家裏夫妻說話時語氣溫和文雅，再要求孩子說話要有禮貌，比如使用“請” 和“謝謝”的禮貌用語。孩子作出的努力要給予認可和讚揚。（Teach your child new skills by first showing the skill yourself, then giving your child opportunities to learn the new skill. For example, speak politely to each other in the home. Then prompt your child to speak politely (e.g., say “please” or “thank you”), and praise your child for their efforts.）
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6. 為孩子設置明確的行為準則。與孩子坐下，進行家庭討論，讓孩子弄明白規章製度，以及不遵守時有什麽後果。（Set clear limits on your child’s behavior. Sit down and have a family discussion on the rules in the home. Let your child know what the consequences will be if they break the rules.）
6. 為孩子設置明確的行為準則。與孩子坐下，進行家庭討論，讓孩子弄明白規章製度，以及不遵守時有什麽後果。（Set clear limits on your child’s behavior. Sit down and have a family discussion on the rules in the home. Let your child know what the consequences will be if they break the rules.）
8 7. 如果孩子犯錯，父母要保持平靜；要給孩子明確的指令，要他停止錯誤行為，並告訴他你期望他怎麽作，比如：”停止打架，在一起玩要友好。“ 如果孩子聽從勸告，要給他稱讚。如果不聽從，就要讓他承擔適當的後果。（If your child misbehaves, stay calm and give them a clear instruction to stop misbehaving and tell them what you would like them to do instead (e.g., “Stop fighting; play nicely with each other.” Praise your child if they do. If they do not stop, follow through with an appropriate consequence.）
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8. 對孩子保持現實的期望。所有的孩子都會有淘氣的時候，為孩子不聽話而進行紀律約束並為之傷腦筋是為人父母的經曆中不可避免的。（Have realistic expectations. All children misbehave at times and it is inevitable that you will have some discipline hassles. ）
9. 企圖作十全十美的父母肯定會讓你沮喪失望的。（ Trying to be the perfect parent can set you up for frustration and disappointment.）
8. 對孩子保持現實的期望。所有的孩子都會有淘氣的時候，為孩子不聽話而進行紀律約束並為之傷腦筋是為人父母的經曆中不可避免的。（Have realistic expectations. All children misbehave at times and it is inevitable that you will have some discipline hassles. ）
9. 企圖作十全十美的父母肯定會讓你沮喪失望的。（ Trying to be the perfect parent can set you up for frustration and disappointment.）
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10. 好好善待自己。如果你成天處於緊張焦慮和抑鬱中，那麽你很難擔任一個平靜寬鬆的家長。每一周盡量找時間讓自己放鬆，或者作一件令自己愉悅的事情。（Look after yourself. It is difficult to be a calm, relaxed parent if you are stressed, anxious, or depressed. Try to find time every week to let yourself unwind or do something that you enjoy.）
10. 好好善待自己。如果你成天處於緊張焦慮和抑鬱中，那麽你很難擔任一個平靜寬鬆的家長。每一周盡量找時間讓自己放鬆，或者作一件令自己愉悅的事情。（Look after yourself. It is difficult to be a calm, relaxed parent if you are stressed, anxious, or depressed. Try to find time every week to let yourself unwind or do something that you enjoy.）
Prepared by Professor Matt Sanders, founder of the Triple P – Positive Parenting Program, and colleagues at the University of Queensland. For further information email parentinfo@triplep.net or visit our website
相關鏈接：Positive Feelings About Race, Ethnicity Tied to Stronger Development in Minority Youth
相關鏈接：SRCD
謝謝教練的點評！
是啊，孩子想幹什麽是孩子需要自己作決定的事，父母推，推不了！父母不可能代替孩子渡過孩子的人生。父母需要作的是保證孩子安全健康，有好奇心，有自信心，和同情心，就行了。
謝謝花床的喜愛！