在一個地方工作已十多年，由於內部調整，或領導調換，我共有過九個直接領導。有人退休，或換工作，已不在一個辦公樓工作了。象許多人說的那樣：Out of sight, out of mind。我沒有留戀過什麽人，大家一起一個gruop lunch，就各奔東西了。
一個辦公室裏另外一個組的頭mike是個從伊朗來的中年人。因為他高中畢業就來美，語言上沒有任何障礙。他工作認真，肯鑽研，加上有近二十年的工作經驗，上上下下的人都願向他問問題，他無論多忙，總是耐心解答所有人的疑問。在一起工作，難免有人欣賞，有人反感。但他卻是個沒人說出個不字的人。
在我考執照前，他總是鼓勵我認真複習，準備好了肯定過。因那時他不是我的直接領導，我和他交往不多，他跟我透露若我考過，他想調我去他那組工作，因為有了那組的工作經驗對我今後發展有好處。
沒想到在我考過，他調我去他那工作過程中出了差錯，他的領導David認為我的語言不過關，背景不強，去那工作我會壓力太大,我的直接領導和他的領導都不同意。Mike開始了為我調動成功的上下遊說，他對David保證我能幹好這個工作。由於他的堅持不懈，我終於到了他的手下工作，同時有了我職場中最重要的提升。過後他跟我說：因為你不能說perfect english而失去這個機會對你是不公平的。我深深知道，能夠成功，不是因為David相信我能幹好工作，而是Mike的威望和堅持，David 不願得罪Mike,這裏需要Mike。
和Mike工作的那幾個月是在愉快之中度過的，每天去辦公室都願先去跟Mike說Good Morning，然後開始一天的工作，真正體會到幹喜歡的工作是人生一大樂事。
好景不長，一天Mike跟我說他要走了，我大吃一驚，問:Are you serious?他說是的。然後我跟他到了他的辦公室，關上門，他告訴我ABC Tech谘詢公司給了他很好的offer，比他當醫生的太太工資還高，他也喜歡去嚐試一下。他接著跟我說，公司run 一個大尺度模式要xxxxx刀，掌握了大尺度模式和相關的知識，我也會“錢途無量”。想到他馬上要走，還關心著我，我的鼻子有些發酸，嘴上還打著哈哈: “過去是你檢查我的工作，現在該我檢查你的工作了。”
我相信他對所有的手下人員都是愛護有加，我的不同是，我是唯一的中國人，唯一的女性。
他走後，有一次我幹的項目是他手下一個人做的。因有些疑問，我們要開會討論，我一提問，那個瘦瘦高高的美國美眉就向他投去求助的目光。可以想象，他在新地方的威望也不低。
現在因工作有時還會在辦公室碰麵，我總是懷著忐忑不安的心，一是因為我沒有象他所期望的掌握好知識去谘詢公司闖去，二是因為我總認為我也沒象他所期望的成為這裏的“大拿”，還有一些說不出的惆悵......
不知這是不是第四種感情，想到在我人生道路上幫助過我的人，他也是其中之一。他是永遠不會看到這些的，在這個靜靡的夏夜，寫出來同時送去我對他和他家人深深的祝福！
| 所有跟貼: |  | ||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||
| • 先給俺付息一下前三種感情是啥：） -sjmj2a- ♂   (0 bytes) (3 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 墮入那啥啥網。 鑒定完畢：） -老別- ♂  (0 bytes) (3 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 先給俺付息一下前三種感情是啥：） -sjmj2a- ♂ -水兒~- ♀ (0 bytes) (5 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 先頂了再讀 -上學前班了- ♀ (0 bytes) (2 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 是不是劃為第五種感情比較合適？ -南木香- ♂ (174 bytes) (43 reads) 8/27/07 欣賞信任一個人，ta剛好是異性 與第四種相比 曖昧度較低—————————————————— 罪過罪過 在諸人生前輩大師前多嘴了 |
| • 我覺得是第8種。 -heka- ♀ (0 bytes) (3 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 工作中碰上個好領導是你的福！ -桂花雨- ♀ (0 bytes) (3 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • LUCK -新新農民- ♂ (0 bytes) (2 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 對你沒有非分之想而隻肯幫你的男人，難得：D -kwx- (0 bytes) (5 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 對你沒有非分之想而隻肯幫你的男人太多了，：D -水兒~- ♀ (52 bytes) (43 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 功力見長~~ -潛潛潛- ♂ (0 bytes) (1 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 這算知遇之恩吧?雖說在這什麽都淡,可對在關鍵時刻扶持過自己的人還是 -玫瑰也瘋狂- ♀ (13 bytes) (33 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 好人。要是能看到他的內心獨白就更好了~~~ -潛潛潛- ♂ (43 bytes) (14 reads) 8/27/07 估計類似於老別，自己把自己扛上去了，苦笑~~~ |
| • 知遇之恩，這是你的好運... -五味七色- ♀ (0 bytes) (2 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 你是一個知恩又會感恩的人﹐像你這樣的人---前途無量﹗頂你。 -成長- ♀ (0 bytes) (1 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 我咋也覺得我們有過相似地。。。。哈，哈 -青春無限- ♀ (0 bytes) (3 reads) 8/27/07 |
| • 前途無量，你也一定是很出色，不然他能那麽堅持把你調過去 -包子臉- ♀ (0 bytes) (1 reads) 8/27/07 |
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 所有跟貼: | | ||
| |||
| |||
| |||
The Unforgettable "fourth Feeling" *
August 26, 2007
I always thought that I don't have any feeling at work place. That was no gender, only supervisors/administrators (boss) and co-workers; hard working people and trying to kill time guys; people with good personalities and those shortcomings. I like this kind of simple relationship until I heard about the "fourth Feeling". All of sudden, I recognize that we do have feeling at office, no matter it was intentionally or unintentionally.
I have been working at the same office for over ten years. I have total nine supervisors because of the job changes or retirement. Most of them are not working in the same building with me. I did not think about any one, like people said: out of sight, out of mind. There was a group lunch together and every one went to their destines.
Mike, a supervisor working at another branch, was a middle-aged guy who came from
Before I took my license exam, he came to my office several times and encouraged me to prepare thoroughly and it would easy to pass. I did not have many contacts with him since he was not my direct supervisor. He told me that he would like to move me to his group after I past the exam because it would benefit my future if I had the working experience at his group.
I never thought it would be a problem moving to his branch but it happened. His boss, David, thought that it would be too stressful for me to work there since I did not have a strong background and my English was not good enough for the work. Mike stared worked with everyone to make my move success. He promised to David that I would definitely do a good job. Finally, I got the chance to work at Mike's branch and in the mean time, I got the most important promotion in my career. Later, Mike said that it was not fair for me to loss this opportunity just because I could not speak excellent English. I understood totally that the reason I could work with Mike not because David believed I could do a good job, but because of Mike's persistent and good reputation. David did not want to make Mike upset, David needed mike here.
It was the most wonderful time working with Mike. I liked to say "Good Morning" to Mike every morning before I stared a day's work. I absolutely felt that doing something enjoyable is the best thing in our life.
But, good things always past by quickly. One day, Mike told me that he was leaving. I was shocked: are you serious? He said yes. At his office, he told me that ABC Tech Co. gave him a very good offer and he would like to try something new too. He also said that running a large-scale model would cost a company thousands and I would have very good opportunities if I manage large-scale modeling. I was touched and had tears in my eyes since he still thought about my career at the time he was leaving, but I just laughed with him: you used to review my work and I will review your work from now on... haha....
I believe he cared about everyone in his branch. The only difference was that I was the only Chinese and only female.
Once, I was reviewing a project, which was conducted by a girl working in his new office. We had a meeting to discuss about some details of the project. Whenever I asked a question, the tall, pretty girl would like to look at Mike for his help. I could tell that he was very popular at the new job too. There was no surprise because his previous co-workers felt very bad to see him leaving when he started working at our office.
Once a while, I could see him at the office build. I always felt excited and a lit bit uneasy. One reason was because I did not master the work and seeking a better future at consulting firms. I also though that I did not become the expert at work as he expected. And, I felt some what emotionally attached...
I don't know if it is the "fourth feeling". Thinking all the people who helped me during the past, he was one of them. He will never see this. At this quiet summer night, put all of my thoughts into words and in the mean time send my best wished to him and his family!
* The first three feelings are: love between family members, love with lovers, and friendship.
Learning English is as important as Sex Education
Thinking carefully about why this happened, I learned the following reasons:
- Did not know enough slang;
- Did not date before and did not know guys in details. Did not understand the “meaning” of their words;
- Did not know that buys like to joke about it from their deep inside.
Here is the story.
I knew nothing about American slang over ten years ago when I came to U.S. We used to use cork all the time in the lab. But, I couldn’t pronounce cork correctly. Instead, I pronounced it “cock”. In English-Chinese dictionary, cock means male chicken. In American slang, it means Guy’s thing.
All the people in our lab were guys except me. I was 21 and just graduated from college in China. I hadn’t dated and only had a short period of crash. During graduate school, all the young people spent long hours at the lab. Everyone was pretty casual; not like working in the companies, which have very strict rules and everyone is serious.
One day, I needed a vacuum cork and couldn’t find the right sized one. I asked my husband (he was 22 and we were pure lab mates): May I borrow your “cock”?
He smiled, but understood my meaning. He was going to pass it to me and the white guy said: Why don’t you like mine? Mine is bigger.
He smiled to my husband with his eyes winked and throw a big one to me.
I tried and said: Your is too big, doesn’t fit! Then asked my husband: I still want yours. He smiled and gave this to me.
The white guy said: “So you like smaller ones, huh? Usually the bigger, the better!”
I said: That’s not true. It has to fit. If it were not fully vacuumed, the lab results would not be good. It is just because the “cock” it too big or too small. The white guy continued: Then his “cock” just fits well?
My husband stopped him: Shut up!
I said: Still a little bit too big. But it should be fine if I use vacuum grease. The white guy said seriously:”oh, yeh, al-way-s use lubricant! But let him do it, he is very experienced, and it is man’s job.” He pointed my husband to me.
Watching the two guys laughing so hard, I said: ”No. I can do it. I like doing most of things by myself unless I really need help (That ‘s my Mom tough me, do everything yourself).”
Then the white guy moved his blue eyes, said:” hmn, you are a feminist, enjoy dominating the process!”
My husband already laughed and couldn’t stand straight up. He held the counter top, told the white guy: Can you just stop here, P-L-S?
I felt it was a little bit strange and asked him why they laughed.
He said: This is called cork, not cock.
I suppose to stop here. But, I felt a little bit embarrassed and knew my pronunciation was wrong. I said: Actually, I knew the meaning of “cock”. My husband and the white guy were stunted. I should stop, it would be perfect.
But, I kept on going:”Cock means male bird.” I didn’t know the other meanings of cock besides “male bird”. Then the white guy asked: What male bird?
I said: hey, you are so innocent, that’s hen’s husband.
My husband pretended pointing a gun to his head,”bang!!”, meant that he wanted to kill himself after heard what I said. Ding,ding,ding!!!
How horrible, I even hadn’t started dating him yet back then.
• 謝謝! -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (2 reads) 1/4/08
• he has the true leadership -傳真- ♀ (0 bytes) (4 reads) 1/4/08
• 難得的好人！俺運氣不好，他走了.. -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (2 reads) 1/4/08
• 這麽好的工作關係，走了真可惜 -雲耳- ♀ (0 bytes) (2 reads) 1/5/08
• 唉！生活中沒有十全十美吧。 -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (0 reads) 1/5/08
• 寫得很好，職場上也經常可以遇到很好的朋友 -龍坡居士- ♂ (0 bytes) (5 reads) 9/10/07
• 所以讓我念念不忘！不好的也有，隻想好的。 -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (4 reads) 9/10/07
• 回複：所以讓我念念不忘！不好的也有，隻想好的。 -龍坡居士- ♂ (50 bytes) (42 reads) 9/10/07
• 回複：回複：所以讓我念念不忘！不好的也有，隻想好的。 -Mom3- ♀ (34 bytes) (26 reads) 9/10/07
• 同感,所以有時候常會懷念這些人. -七月紅袖- ♀ (0 bytes) (5 reads) 9/10/07
• 應該還是正常的上下級的同事之間的感情吧？何為第4種？ -五味七色- ♀ (0 bytes) (5 reads) 9/10/07
• 親情，友情，愛情，這是友情？ -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (6 reads) 9/10/07
• 不是友情還有啥情？（不是男女之情） -五味七色- ♀ (0 bytes) (5 reads) 9/10/07
• 不來往的，從未有過個人交往。不是男女之情. -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (4 reads) 9/10/07
• 57，我剛在你的根據地奔過。 -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (6 reads) 9/10/07
• 工作上能力見解接近的人惺惺相惜算感情嗎？我倒也經曆過 -無奈雞肋- ♀ (580 bytes) (183 reads) 9/10/07
• 握手！高興我們有相同的感受。 -Mom3- ♀ (0 bytes) (4 reads) 9/10/07
• 好的同事，如沐春風。 -卿- ♀
由於種種原因一直沒跳槽，現在的工作也有一些優點。
新年快樂！
新年好！