mind wandering

I woke up at 6:00 am. The woke-up is so sudden that I can not fall sleep again. I wanted to make a call, however, I replace it with writing down this diary. I will keep the time of writing in 30 minutes.
There are so much to write. I do not know how to start now. Every word is just flowing through my mind. I feel sometime that I am vulnerable. If a person's routine is broken up, there will be so much emptyness. Almost two years has passed with endless calling, however, I must stop now. I have to find another way to fill up this emptiness. I will not induldge myself in anything which is harmful to my mind, my body and my friend.
Actually, after my wife left me and my kids three years ago, I undergoes a transformation. I feel very happy with my kids. I will learn from the mom that write down their stories in the blog. However, I am not a good writer. I have the mind to think, however, when I wanted to put into paper, my mind just went black. I will do my best to record my kid's fun stories. There are so many fun stories of my little daubhter. She is five years old and started to go to kindergaten last week. I also send her to the Chinese school and spend the whole afternoon in her class. The teacher is a good teacher and she had taught knidergarten in China for more than twenty year and in the US for more than 10 years. She has her own textbook instead of the standard book.
My little daughter, Amy, is very active. She is a very good learner. I am taking care of her by myself for more three years. Her mom went away about three years ago with her boss, a rubish Russian man. Now Amy is most the happy, gifted, able girl in her age. She has so many friends and activities. Yesterday, she told me that she is the busiest. She has four classes. :kindergarten, Violin, Chinese and swimming. Now she can read a lot by herself. I am wondering how she could learn reading so quickly. She could read poems, picture books. I think she might be learning from me that I am reading aloud a lot.  I have read do many books to her since she was two. She can recite little books completely with the picture after I read to her a couple of times.
Time is over for this morning. I should stop here. The story will continue. I will go out for exercis and training now. I will be back in about one hour later. I will describe this almighty traning and almighty goal later. There would be a miracle. I truly beleive that I will succeed.